Que & Ironhide's Exchange
Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2011 8:30 pm
I'm a fan of the films, but I'm also a bit of an amateur writer...So like many of you, I'm finding faults with dialogue that either don't flow or make sense...
I direct you to this moment in Dark of the Moon:
QUE: This gun is the perfect invention, Ironhide!
IRONHIDE: Right!
To me, this is probably the most annoying exchange in DOTM (I know, it's not the only one and it's insignificant BUT...) because it absolutely makes no contextual sense and it sounds like Ehren rushed it at 3:00am or something thinking 'Argh! I need some robot dialogue...! Sod it, I'm finishing this page now or never...' and just shoved it in at the last/tired second.
As far as I can see, there is only one way this exchange can make sense (which means a reference to the game) and I'm imagining something like this;
IRONHIDE: Que, there's something wrong with this Second Heavy Iron upgrade! It's not even *half* the punch I need it to be!
QUE: Oh, you're just not usin' it right!
IRONHIDE: Sorry, I'll just consult the instruction manual next time...!
QUE: Oh yes, I forgot to put one in, didn't I...Anyway, look here, see this lever?
IRONHIDE: Yeah.
QUE: That's your power setting. It's only halfway down, y'see! The more power you put into each shot, the less you can fire, so that's why I set it in the middle...All you have to do is kick it down and activate the stabilizing rings inside the barrel...
IRONHIDE: How?
QUE: The switch underneath the lever...
IRONHIDE: And that makes it more accurate?
QUE: Well, it depends how good a shot you are! But you see? There's nothing wrong with it at all! This gun is the perfect invention, Ironhide!
IRONHIDE: Right...
Now, I don't claim to be a great writer, but it's something...! Gives a bit for character and an attempt to sound naturalistic! (Yeah, I know...Robots...But they know our languages!)
Just needed to get that off my chest!
Now, to tackle that 'we've seen that and it is not that...' line...
I direct you to this moment in Dark of the Moon:
QUE: This gun is the perfect invention, Ironhide!
IRONHIDE: Right!
To me, this is probably the most annoying exchange in DOTM (I know, it's not the only one and it's insignificant BUT...) because it absolutely makes no contextual sense and it sounds like Ehren rushed it at 3:00am or something thinking 'Argh! I need some robot dialogue...! Sod it, I'm finishing this page now or never...' and just shoved it in at the last/tired second.
As far as I can see, there is only one way this exchange can make sense (which means a reference to the game) and I'm imagining something like this;
IRONHIDE: Que, there's something wrong with this Second Heavy Iron upgrade! It's not even *half* the punch I need it to be!
QUE: Oh, you're just not usin' it right!
IRONHIDE: Sorry, I'll just consult the instruction manual next time...!
QUE: Oh yes, I forgot to put one in, didn't I...Anyway, look here, see this lever?
IRONHIDE: Yeah.
QUE: That's your power setting. It's only halfway down, y'see! The more power you put into each shot, the less you can fire, so that's why I set it in the middle...All you have to do is kick it down and activate the stabilizing rings inside the barrel...
IRONHIDE: How?
QUE: The switch underneath the lever...
IRONHIDE: And that makes it more accurate?
QUE: Well, it depends how good a shot you are! But you see? There's nothing wrong with it at all! This gun is the perfect invention, Ironhide!
IRONHIDE: Right...
Now, I don't claim to be a great writer, but it's something...! Gives a bit for character and an attempt to sound naturalistic! (Yeah, I know...Robots...But they know our languages!)
Just needed to get that off my chest!
Now, to tackle that 'we've seen that and it is not that...' line...