Hi everyone! I hope that you enjoy this; I know that I'm having fun writing it! Please feel free to comment on the story; positively or negatively. Anyway, onto the story...
?Shrek vs. the Transformers? Chapter 2: ?Shall we say 7:00??:
Inside a darkened room of Shrek's house, a pair of glowing optics move quietly through the darkness. Sounds of clinging metal fill the air as a faint silhouette of a robot holding something in front of him is visible. He outstretches the object and closes his optics, ?Light our darkest hour!!!?
?RATTRAP! Cut the dramatics and just light the lantern already!? Silverbolt calls out as the room lights up. Rattrap quickly tosses down the match as it burns his fingers.
Silverbolt shakes his head as he looks out the window and sighs, ?Too bad Optimus is too big to fit through Shrek?s front door?? Cheetor joins him next to the window ledge, ?How ya holdin? out Bigbot?? Outside in the rain Optimus sits on a rock, using his arm shields to protect himself. Optimus sighs, ?In a word?prime.?
Elsewhere, Megatron and Waspinator walk through the rain inside DuLoc. ?Megatron?Wazpinator has question.? Waspinator begins. Megatron stops and turns to face him. ?What is it?? he sneers. ?How did Megatron come back? Wazpinator remembers Megatron leaving Earth.? Waspinator asks him. Megatron look at him in confusion. ?Didn?t you get the memo?? ?No, Wazpinator did not get memo.? ?You must have received it.? ?No, Wazpinator did not get memo!!? ?Well then, if you could get it, that would be great?.yessss.? Megatron smiles and continues walking towards the main tower.
Back at the swamp, Optimus decides to lie down in the rain and enjoy the rain when a noise startles him. ?What was that?? Cheetor asks from inside the house. ?It sounded like it came from over there?? Silverbolt points towards some trees, and a shadowy figure darts through the trees. Optimus stands to his feet and aims his chest cannons towards the tress, and waits for any movement. Suddenly, the figure appears and the form of a massive dragon rears up as lightning cracks from behind.
?MEGATRON!!!? They all shout as the others draw their weapons. Just as their about to shoot, they hear something approaching from behind. ?BABY!!? A voice calls out, and Optimus and the others watch in confusion as Donkey runs towards the dragon. ?Megatron and Donkey are?eewwww!? Cheetor mutters in disgust. ?Hey everybody; I?d like you to meet my wife-to-be, Dragon!?
?Dragon?!? Optimus asks in confusion as the rain lets up a little. ?Yeah! You see Shrek and I rescued Princess Fiona from a castle, and Dragon here was guarding the castle. But through my animal magnetism, we fell in love and now we?re dating!? Donkey explains happily. Dragon steps closer and finally they see her completely. ?Whew, that was a close one!? Cheetor wipes his brow. ?Eh, if ya ask me, I?ve seen enough dragons for one lifetime.? Rattrap mutters quietly to himself.
Back in DuLoc, the rain has stopped and a little sunlight peeks through the clouds as the two Predacons walk up to the entrance of the main tower of DuLoc. A simple sign hangs on the door, ?Do not disturb?that means YOU!!?
?Well Waspinator, it would appear that we are not welcome here as robots, but perhaps we?ll be welcomed as beasts?? Megatron smiles at Waspinator as they both transform into beast mode. Megatron studies the door and lightly scratches at it with his claw. ?Hmm, no reaction. Surely they must know we?re here.? He looks around and notices a button. ?Perhaps this is what I need to press in order to open the door...yesss.? He presses the doorbell and the door slowly creeks open. ?Ah yes, my theory proves true. The quantum surge which has altered my body has made me?? He turns to see Waspinator looking at him stupidly, ??Nevermind. Let?s go in.?
They walk inside and are greeted by a man in a fine suit. "Hello, who are you?" Megatron asks him. His eyes are closed and his head is held high. ?I'm the butler." He replies smugly. "What do you do?" Megatron inquires. The man merely laughs a little, "I buttle."
The man walks off down one of the halls, leaving Megatron and Waspinator with confused looks on their faces. Megatron dismisses it finally and they begin walking again. As they walk through the hollow corridors of the massive foyer entrance, they hear singing near the end of the corridors. They proceed towards the sound, and make their way to a closed door at the far end. Megatron puts his head next to the door and listens?
?I?m too sexy for my shirt; too sexy for my shirt; so sexy it hu-urts!? The voice sings, and Megatron winces in pain, ?Note to self: Never listen to anyone to sing again.? He grabs the door handle and opens it quickly, and they see someone rush behind a cloth curtain inside a bathtub.
?Who dares disturb the great and powerful Prince Charming?!? he calls out from behind the curtain. ?Wazpinator thought he was going to say something else.? Waspinator buzzes. Megatron gives him a quick look of annoyance, and proceeds to walk towards the bathtub. ?Are you in charge around here?? Megatron demands as he walks up to the edge of the curtain. ?And whom may I inquire is asking?? Charming asks as he sinks into the bubble bath. Megatron rips back the curtain, ?I AM!?
?AAAHHHHHH!!!!!? Charming screams and reaches for the curtain, but it?s too far away. ?A dragon!! How did you get in here?!? he demands. ?The butler was too busy buttling to stop us?? Megatron sneers as he looks Charming directly in the face, ?You never did answer my question?? ?I do not address dragons, I slay them!? Charming reaches down for his sword on the floor near the tub; but Waspinator grabs it and gives it to Megatron. ?So human, you want to play games, yesssss?? Megatron snarls as he peers directly into Charming?s eyes. A staring match ensues, and Charming stares up at the fiercesome dragon with equal contempt.
Just then, something in the tub catches Megatron?s eye, ?By the pit!! You have a rubber ducky?!? Charming looks at Megatron in shock, and then reaches down and grabs the toy. ?Why yes I do?his name is Mr. Bigglesworth. Isn?t he cuuuuttte?!? He rubs the ducky against his face with a smile. Megatron leans back and rubs his chin, ?Hmm?perhaps this fleshling Human isn?t so bad after all?? he leans back down to eye-level with Charming, ?What was your name again Human?? ?Prince Charming, and yours?? he asks as he sets the ducky down back in the water. ?My name is Megatron?and this buffoon is Waspinator.? He points to his right and Waspinator shakes his head in agreement. ?That aside, I need to speak with you about a certain matter,? Megatron looks a clock on the wall, ?Shall we say 7:00?? ?It would be my pleasure!? Prince Charming announces as he stands out of the tub and shakes Megatron?s hand. All of a sudden, he realizes that he?s naked. Megatron stares in horror, ?It?s so...small.? Prince Charming quickly covers his privates and grabs the curtain with his other hand, ?7:00 sounds great?? he pulls the curtains shut quickly. Megatron turns around to see Waspinator covering his eyes. ?NOOOOOO!!!!! Wazpinator iz scarred for LIFE!!!? he cries in horror.
In the meantime back at Shrek?s house, the rain has stopped. ?So, is anyone going to wake up Rhinox?? Optimus asks, pointing towards the house. ?Nah, let him snooze,? Rattrap begins as he looks at Rhinox sleeping on the floor inside, ?He looks happy right now; and when he finds out where we are; he ain?t gonna be too happy!? Optimus laughs, ?Maybe you?re right.?
?So, Optimum Primus is it?? Shrek asks. ?It?s Optimus Primal...? Optimus mutters quietly, ?But as you were saying?? ?Yeah, just how long were you and your men planning on staying here?? Shrek inquires, raising an eyebrow. ?Why?? Optimus asks. ?Oh, no reason?I just like my privacy, and?? ?Say no more; we?ll leave!? Rattrap buts in. ?Really?? Shrek asks. ?Nah. I was just kidding.? Rattrap laughs. ?Shut up Rattrap!? Optimus yells.
?Mister Shrek has a point however; we are not supposed to be here. The quicker we leave, the sooner he and his family can get back to their normal lives.? Optimus tells everyone. ?Yeah, but I hope ya were plannin? on takin? the Yellow Submarine?? Rattrap points at the almost fully submerged shuttle. Optimus sighs, ?Well, it appears that we might have to find another way then.?
?Well, you?re welcome to stay here as long as you?d like,? Fiona begins and gives Shrek a dirty look, ??Right?? ?Oh yeah sure?no problem.? Shrek grins innocently and puts his hand behind his head. ?Hey guys?I see someone coming!? Blackarachnia shouts from the top of the hill. ?Who is it?? Everyone asks simultaneously. Donkey hops onto Dragon?s head, and Dragon peers over the top of the hill, ?It?s Puss!?
A few moments later, Puss comes running over the hill followed by Blackarachnia and into the swamp. ?Hey, what?s shakin? fellow cat?? Cheetor asks as he greets Puss. Puss looks down at himself, ?Nothing; hopefully.?
?And just where have you been?? Shrek asks him. ?Se?or, you?ll never believe this?but I was in DuLoc, and I seen giant robots?? He looks around at the Maximals, ?kind-of like you, heh.? Shrek looks down at Puss, ?Right now Puss; I?d believe anything you told me.?
?What were you doing in DuLoc anyway?? Shrek asks him. ?Well, there was this kitty was having a fiesta at her caba?a and?? he looks away shyly, ??maybe I have said too much.?
?Argh! Optimus, I can?t get this scanner to work!? Silverbolt states in frustration as he holds a piece of scanning equipment. ?Hmm?so luck finding energon then I take it?? Optimus asks as he walks over to Silverbolt. ?No?? Silverbolt begins as he sees something on the scanner. ?Whoa. D?j? vu.? Optimus freezes in his tracks. ?What did you just say?? Optimus asks. ?Nothing. Just had a little d?j? vu.? Silverbolt reassures him. ?What did you see?? Optimus asks him, concerned. ?What happened?? Shrek asks, walking over towards them. ?A white blip went past on the screen, and then another that looked just like it.? Silverbolt explains. ?How much like it? Was it the same blip?? Optimus asks. ?It might have been. I'm not sure.? Silverbolt admits with a shoulder shrug. ?Rattrap! Get Rhinox!? Optimus calls out. ?What is it?? Silverbolt looks around in confusion. ?A d?j? vu like that is usually a glitch in the scanner. It happens when it?s broken.? Optimus explains with a smile, ?But don?t worry; Rhinox can fix it.?
?So, what did these other bots look like?? Optimus asks Puss. ?You see Se?or; there were two, one large red one and a smaller green one.? ?Three guesses who the red one is; and the first two don?t count.? Blackarachnia states. ?Megatron.? Optimus states as he clenches his fist. ?But who?s the green one?? Blackarachnia asks. ?Could it be?Waspinator?? Silverbolt says, and the Maximals look at each other, and all reply at the same moment, ?NAH!?
Back in DuLoc?Megatron and Waspinator exit the main tower and walk out into the empty streets. Megatron looks around and notices something, ?Hmm?I really hate to do this Waspinator but it appears that I have no choice since I can?t find any energon around here?? ?Waz that Megatron?? Waspinator asks him in wonder as they walk up to a building.
?Well, hi there! Welcome to the DuLoc Friar Fat Boy. May I take your order?? the friendly drive-thru order taker asks. ?Wait?you?re a dragon?? The guy suddenly realizes what Megatron is. ?So? Is that a problem?? Megatron snarls at him. ?Uh?no sir?what I can get for you?? He asks hesitantly. ?Ah yes?I?ll have the #2 without tomatoes but with extra ketchup and mustard, and a jug of milk as the drink.? He turns to face Waspinator, ?and what do you want?? ?Wazpinator wants Medieval Meal!? Waspinator buzzes and laughs happily. ?The idiot?ll have a Medieval Meal?and that?ll be it.? Megatron tells him. ?O.K., that?ll be $13.26 please.? The order taker says. ?But Megatron?we have no money!? Waspinator proclaims. ?This is why I am in charge imbecile?? he produces a wallet and hands the order taker some cash, ??I am the wise tyrant after all??
At that exact moment back in the main tower? ?Dear, I have a problem.? Prince Charming, now fully dressed, tells the ugly stepsister. ?What?s dat?? she asks him. He extends out the pockets of his pants, ?I seem to have lost my wallet??
Megatron and Waspinator have been spotted in DuLoc! Whatever are the Maximals going to do?! And what of Megatron?s plans to meet with Prince Charming?! Will Shrek be able to keep his sanity as he waits for the Maximals to leave his swamp?!
Watch for the answers to these and many more exciting questions in the coming chapters!