The Energon Pub

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 4:33 pm**

What with the hairy oik, love him's birthday coming up I thought I'd share a few musings I had on my good friend.

Further to Bill Hick's point that Jesus probably wouldn't want to see a crucifix, just as Jackie Kennedy wouldn't want to see a sniper pendent. My friend Brian Cohen (seriously, real name and yes He Is Not The Messiah) concluded that should Jesus ever return wouldn't he be more inclined to be a little naughtier than he was before seeing as he was awefully nice and alledgedly died for it?

Brian further concluded that surely that would mean he could plausibly end up playing the Antichrist if St. John was ever right?

I personally feel Jesus would giggle off all that darkly voodooed tripped out shift and freely don the Armor of Christ and go to battle against Satan!

I'm not hate raving or baiting honestly. I've taken a more than Gnostic interested in Jesus, and grown to love and accept him into my life.

I'm so alluding to being a little anointed that I'm so bold as to state that; as Genesis said:

Jesus he knows me and he knows I'm right...

I can also only further conclude, this thread will be locked and I'll be banned from Heaven/Valhalla/Seibertron forever and amore.

If so?

Happy Jesus Birthday everyone!

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 4:39 pm**

PHFT! Thor could beat Jesus any day of the week.

He's a real man's kind of God, one that doesn't take any guff from the other deities. Then goes home, has sex with his hot wife, gets drunk off his ass, then goes to punch people he doesn't like in the face.

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 4:41 pm**

Primus C-00 wrote:I personally feel Jesus would giggle off all that darkly voodooed tripped out shift and freely don the Armor of Christ and go to battle against Satan!

With something like this?

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 5:10 pm**

Shadowman wrote:PHFT! Thor could beat Jesus any day of the week.

He's a real man's kind of God, one that doesn't take any guff from the other deities. Then goes home, has sex with his hot wife, gets drunk off his ass, then goes to punch people he doesn't like in the face.

See if Jesus had done that first time around the Bible would've been a lot cooler...

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 5:54 pm**

Jesus Christ is my Lord and savior!

and my homeboy.

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 6:00 pm**

Counterpunch wrote:Jesus Christ is my Lord and savior!

and my homeboy.

Amen to that brother!

:grin:

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 6:03 pm**

http://www.hempbc.com/backissues/cc11/christ.html

:-B

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 6:49 pm**

Sorta reminds me of my easter speech, the reason why we hide colored eggs and the whole sort.

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 7:09 pm**

Something I find interesting is that no one bothers with zombie Balder, robot Huitzilopochtli or ninja Zeus but there's a million and three different kinds of Jesus Christ.

I'm guessing that it's because Christianity is mainstream and thus needs to be spiced up a little to be properly amusing.

Senor Hugo wrote:Sorta reminds me of my easter speech, the reason why we hide colored eggs and the whole sort.

The potential racial subtext for this has me snickering. Just so you know.

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 7:13 pm**

Kjell wrote:Something I find interesting is that no one bothers with zombie Balder, robot Huitzilopochtli or ninja Zeus but there's a million and three different kinds of Jesus Christ.

I'm guessing that it's because Christianity is mainstream and thus needs to be spiced up a little to be properly amusing.

Senor Hugo wrote:Sorta reminds me of my easter speech, the reason why we hide colored eggs and the whole sort.

The potential racial subtext for this has me snickering. Just so you know.

Raptor Jesus!

Sorry, err, RAPTOR JESUS!

Omega Lulz!

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 7:40 pm**

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 7:49 pm**

Kjell wrote:Something I find interesting is that no one bothers with zombie Balder, robot Huitzilopochtli or ninja Zeus but there's a million and three different kinds of Jesus Christ.

I'm guessing that it's because Christianity is mainstream and thus needs to be spiced up a little to be properly amusing.

Senor Hugo wrote:Sorta reminds me of my easter speech, the reason why we hide colored eggs and the whole sort.

The potential racial subtext for this has me snickering. Just so you know.

Nah, nothing racial. It was way more creative and offensive.

I can't find the original but it went along the lines of after rising from the grave Zombie Jesus hungered for the Egg of Power in order to take over the world. This Egg of Power was hidden, and several fakes were hidden in villages just in case Zombie Jesus showed up looking for the real Egg of Power.

So, it has been tradition every easter, when Zombie Jesus rises from the grave once more in everlasting hunger for the Egg of Power, that we hide colored eggs in order to throw him off and hopefully calm his hunger for another year.

I'll write up the whole thing again on Easter Day.

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 8:06 pm**

Senor Hugo wrote:
Kjell wrote:Something I find interesting is that no one bothers with zombie Balder, robot Huitzilopochtli or ninja Zeus but there's a million and three different kinds of Jesus Christ.

I'm guessing that it's because Christianity is mainstream and thus needs to be spiced up a little to be properly amusing.

Senor Hugo wrote:Sorta reminds me of my easter speech, the reason why we hide colored eggs and the whole sort.

The potential racial subtext for this has me snickering. Just so you know.

Nah, nothing racial. It was way more creative and offensive.

I can't find the original but it went along the lines of after rising from the grave Zombie Jesus hungered for the Egg of Power in order to take over the world. This Egg of Power was hidden, and several fakes were hidden in villages just in case Zombie Jesus showed up looking for the real Egg of Power.

So, it has been tradition every easter, when Zombie Jesus rises from the grave once more in everlasting hunger for the Egg of Power, that we hide colored eggs in order to throw him off and hopefully calm his hunger for another year.

I'll write up the whole thing again on Easter Day.

that gets one big LOL. might even better than the south park version

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 10:32 pm**

I honestly don't get why people care that Jesus died for them. I mean, he CAME BACK three days later. Martin Luther King died for people, stayed dead, and doesn't get nearly the respect that this Jesus fellow gets. That's even more strange as we have conclusive evidence that shows that Martin Luther King actually existed. Unlike a certain false messiah I could mention.

Posted: **Tue Oct 30, 2007 11:11 pm**

Professor Smooth wrote:I honestly don't get why people care that Jesus died for them. I mean, he CAME BACK three days later. Martin Luther King died for people, stayed dead, and doesn't get nearly the respect that this Jesus fellow gets. That's even more strange as we have conclusive evidence that shows that Martin Luther King actually existed. Unlike a certain false messiah I could mention.

You know what I don't get? Why, at every turn, and every chance, you harp on about how "Christianity is wrong."

I mean seriously. Why is it, that because you don't believe in a certain religion, you have to point out how it's wrong, all the time.

It can't be for discussion purposes. You know what people are going to say, then you just bring something else up to refute what they post.

It's the same old story, the same old song and dance my friend.

Is it just to remind people how you don't believe in a higher power?

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 12:50 am**

Senor Hugo wrote:
Professor Smooth wrote:I honestly don't get why people care that Jesus died for them. I mean, he CAME BACK three days later. Martin Luther King died for people, stayed dead, and doesn't get nearly the respect that this Jesus fellow gets. That's even more strange as we have conclusive evidence that shows that Martin Luther King actually existed. Unlike a certain false messiah I could mention.

You know what I don't get? Why, at every turn, and every chance, you harp on about how "Christianity is wrong."

You have an odd definition of "harping." It seems to me that your definition consists entirely of "saying something I don't agree with."

Senor Hugo wrote:
I mean seriously. Why is it, that because you don't believe in a certain religion, you have to point out how it's wrong, all the time.

Why do the people who hate Masterpiece Megatron feel the need to point out its flaws in every topic about the figure? Because it's their right to share their opinion on things on this message board.

Senor Hugo wrote:
It can't be for discussion purposes. You know what people are going to say, then you just bring something else up to refute what they post.

It's entirely for discussion purposes. Though, I must admit, having anything resembling a civilized discussion about anything religious is very difficult. I assume somebody has already complained to the site mods about this thread. I do tend to refute the claims of Muslims, Jews, and Christians, though. Often with little effort. I'm not sure that says much about the credibility of their beliefs if they're so easily refuted.

Senor Hugo wrote:It's the same old story, the same old song and dance my friend.

Is it just to remind people how you don't believe in a higher power?

Who says I don't believe in a higher power?

What I don't get is why, every time I put forth my opinion in a thread, I get people like you completely sidestepping my points, to say nothing of forgetting that everyone is entitled to their own opinion. If you disagree with me or my points, then, by all means, do so. Do not, however politely, try to tell me to keep them to myself. You don't pop into the Toy Discussion Forum and tell the six people who didn't like the Classics line to keep quiet because they're in the minority. You won't go into the Pro Wrestling thread in GD and tell the John Cena supporters to cram it. I doubt you'd go into the Movie Forum and tell people who thought the new movie was the best action movie ever to STFU.

Yes, I view (what I assume is your) religion as fiction. I see it as no different from any other fiction and I will discuss it as such.

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 2:47 am**

Senor Hugo wrote:
Professor Smooth wrote:I honestly don't get why people care that Jesus died for them. I mean, he CAME BACK three days later. Martin Luther King died for people, stayed dead, and doesn't get nearly the respect that this Jesus fellow gets. That's even more strange as we have conclusive evidence that shows that Martin Luther King actually existed. Unlike a certain false messiah I could mention.

You know what I don't get? Why, at every turn, and every chance, you harp on about how "Christianity is wrong."

I mean seriously. Why is it, that because you don't believe in a certain religion, you have to point out how it's wrong, all the time.

It can't be for discussion purposes. You know what people are going to say, then you just bring something else up to refute what they post.

It's the same old story, the same old song and dance my friend.

Is it just to remind people how you don't believe in a higher power?

Smooth you are just being pathetic now (well, not just now. Pretty much every time of the year) GTFO already.

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 6:45 am**

Professor Smooth wrote:I do tend to refute the claims of Muslims, Jews, and Christians, though. Often with little effort. I'm not sure that says much about the credibility of their beliefs if they're so easily refuted.

I think it's more statements like this that people feel the need to comment about you every time you put forth your case ad nauseum. No, you haven't singlehandedly disproven a religion that has been around for thousands of years and, no, you don't speak for its followers and their beliefs. I don't know why you think you have a window into their thoughts.

Senor Hugo wrote:Who says I don't believe in a higher power?

At this point, you have everyone saying you don't believe in a higher power. What else would you have us think?

But if we're not to assume things about you, don't assume things about others.

Smooth, you have to accept at this point, especially after so many posts, that people are just tired of your tone about this sort of thing. Do you really think people want to read your posts when all you do is berate and insult them for their beliefs?

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 7:12 am**

Senor Hugo wrote:
Professor Smooth wrote:I honestly don't get why people care that Jesus died for them. I mean, he CAME BACK three days later. Martin Luther King died for people, stayed dead, and doesn't get nearly the respect that this Jesus fellow gets. That's even more strange as we have conclusive evidence that shows that Martin Luther King actually existed. Unlike a certain false messiah I could mention.

You know what I don't get? Why, at every turn, and every chance, you harp on about how "Christianity is wrong."

I mean seriously. Why is it, that because you don't believe in a certain religion, you have to point out how it's wrong, all the time.

It can't be for discussion purposes. You know what people are going to say, then you just bring something else up to refute what they post.

It's the same old story, the same old song and dance my friend.

Is it just to remind people how you don't believe in a higher power?

For the atheist, the argument is easy. The standards for argument and evidence (by what we recognize as the scientific method) clearly side with the stance that 'there's no reason to believe in a higher power.

Faith is at a disadvantage in that it asks you to do something, which by all accounts is contrary to behavior you might otherwise support, in this case, a detailed line of proof and evidence.

The truth of the matter, and what really rains on the parade of those like Smooth, who attempt to 'disprove' a faith (when from the beginning, faith does not ask to be 'proven' to begin with) is that the standards for argument are entirely different and irreconsilable.

Demanding that faith be supported by evidence of fact, undermines the basic concept of faith and in the same way, faith attempting to justify itself by presenting 'evidence' only undermines its basic principals.

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 9:30 am**

This is why we can't have nice things
Also why that other discussion forum was closed.

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 10:17 am**

Professor Smooth wrote:You have an odd definition of "harping." It seems to me that your definition consists entirely of "saying something I don't agree with."

It's not that I agree or disagree with it. It's that, whenever I see any sort of discussion on religion. Boom, there you are saying "Christianity is wrong" in one form or another.

Professor Smooth wrote:
Why do the people who hate Masterpiece Megatron feel the need to point out its flaws in every topic about the figure? Because it's their right to share their opinion on things on this message board.

Sure, of course it's their and your right to voice an opinion about something. But then when that opinion is heard constantly, over and over. Well, it just gets annoying.

Professor Smooth wrote:
It's entirely for discussion purposes. Though, I must admit, having anything resembling a civilized discussion about anything religious is very difficult. I assume somebody has already complained to the site mods about this thread. I do tend to refute the claims of Muslims, Jews, and Christians, though. Often with little effort. I'm not sure that says much about the credibility of their beliefs if they're so easily refuted.

It isn't that hard to have a civilized discussion about religion, it really isn't. I do it all the time. The key is, not to attack the beliefs of a religion. Which, while you may be wanting to discuss everything, the continual asking why, getting a reason, then pointing out something else that "proves" a reason wrong or what not, comes off as an attack.

Professor Smooth wrote:
Who says I don't believe in a higher power?

What I don't get is why, every time I put forth my opinion in a thread, I get people like you completely sidestepping my points, to say nothing of forgetting that everyone is entitled to their own opinion. If you disagree with me or my points, then, by all means, do so. Do not, however politely, try to tell me to keep them to myself. You don't pop into the Toy Discussion Forum and tell the six people who didn't like the Classics line to keep quiet because they're in the minority. You won't go into the Pro Wrestling thread in GD and tell the John Cena supporters to cram it. I doubt you'd go into the Movie Forum and tell people who thought the new movie was the best action movie ever to STFU.

Yes, I view (what I assume is your) religion as fiction. I see it as no different from any other fiction and I will discuss it as such.

Hell, from what I remember, you were a Satanist(For those who don't know, that isn't devil worshipping.) And if thats still true, they don't believe in a higher power, just the power of the self.

And no, I personally don't go through and tell the people ranting on about the same thing, copy and pasting the same posts in the movie, toy or TFGD forums to STFU. I don't need to, other people do that.

However, I will do that in a philosophical discussion, if I view a religion as being attacked. Which in this case the first thing you did in the post was say "False Messiah," thats an attack.

Lastly, I'm not a Christian, God and JEsus don't sit right with me. I'm a Shaman, nature spirits, vision quests, animal totems, all that good stuff is what I'm about.

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 2:04 pm**

"This prayer the Holy Saurian didst impart upon his loyal followers, the seventh hour of the fourth day of the eleventh month, during the festival of loli-worship."

Our Raptor,
Who art in /h/eaven,
shopped be Thy face;
Thy donations come,
Thy posts be done
in /b/ as it is in /h/eaven.
Give us this day our daily Bridget;
and forgive us our trolling
as we forgive those who troll against us,
and lead us not into faggotry,
but deliver us from /fur/ry.
In the name of the Moot, the Raptor, and the Holy Server,
Amen.

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 2:10 pm**

Primus C-00 wrote:"This prayer the Holy Saurian didst impart upon his loyal followers, the seventh hour of the fourth day of the eleventh month, during the festival of loli-worship."

Our Raptor,
Who art in /h/eaven,
shopped be Thy face;
Thy donations come,
Thy posts be done
in /b/ as it is in /h/eaven.
Give us this day our daily Bridget;
and forgive us our trolling
as we forgive those who troll against us,
and lead us not into faggotry,
but deliver us from /fur/ry.
In the name of the Moot, the Raptor, and the Holy Server,
Amen.

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 3:56 pm**

Senor Hugo wrote:
Professor Smooth wrote:
Why do the people who hate Masterpiece Megatron feel the need to point out its flaws in every topic about the figure? Because it's their right to share their opinion on things on this message board.

Sure, of course it's their and your right to voice an opinion about something. But then when that opinion is heard constantly, over and over. Well, it just gets annoying.

Not taking Smooth's side here (because as far as i'm concerned this thread looked fun until he chimed in) but just the other day I was lectured by a Mod about picking on some new member about an age old topic popping up again.

I believe the lecture was along the lines of "you've been here so long everything's been discussed, new people haven't so they will want to discuss something that's been discussed many times before"

So while Smooth may be like a broken record, his opinions may be fresh to some new person. :-(

Posted: **Wed Oct 31, 2007 3:59 pm**

Burn wrote:
Senor Hugo wrote:
Professor Smooth wrote:
Why do the people who hate Masterpiece Megatron feel the need to point out its flaws in every topic about the figure? Because it's their right to share their opinion on things on this message board.

Sure, of course it's their and your right to voice an opinion about something. But then when that opinion is heard constantly, over and over. Well, it just gets annoying.

Not taking Smooth's side here (because as far as i'm concerned this thread looked fun until he chimed in) but just the other day I was lectured by a Mod about picking on some new member about an age old topic popping up again.

I believe the lecture was along the lines of "you've been here so long everything's been discussed, new people haven't so they will want to discuss something that's been discussed many times before"

So while Smooth may be like a broken record, his opinions may be fresh to some new person.

True, but isn't it also a rule not to bash other people's beliefs? Calling Christianity "Fiction" is a good example of that.

The Energon Pub

Jesus

Jesus

Re: Jesus