The Energon Pub

Posted: **Mon Sep 28, 2009 10:56 am**

Since my StarWars tread has kinda dried up I thought I'd try this with StarTrek...

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Worf: Commander, we've recieved a message from StarFleet.

Riker takes PADD from Worf and reads: "Go directly to jail. Do not pass "Go." Do not collect 200 dollars!"

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Kirk: Open...hailing frequencies.

Uhura: Hailing frequencies open Captain.

Kirk: I'm Captain James T. Kirk representing the United Earth Space Agency...NO! SPOCK, who do we work for?

Spock sighs: You are such a douchbag!

Kirk: I'm Captain Kirk of the "You are such a douchbag!"

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Picard: Number One, I require your assistance in dropping a captain's log.

Riker: Yes sir!

Posted: **Mon Sep 28, 2009 11:09 am**

Picard: Number One, you have the bridge, I need to do a Number Two.

Posted: **Thu Oct 01, 2009 7:36 pm**

Editor wrote:Picard: Number One, you have the bridge, I need to do a Number Two.

LOL; thanks for contributing

Posted: **Sat Oct 03, 2009 4:11 pm**

Worf: I'm all out of toilet paper.

Posted: **Sun Oct 04, 2009 5:52 pm**

Data: F*ck y'all! Being an android is better than being a human.

Worf: You're right, Captain. My head does look like a fanny.

Spock: Shut the hell up, Bones. You die now! (Vulcan Neck Pinch)

Posted: **Sun Oct 04, 2009 5:53 pm**

Picard: Mr. Worf, fire at will!

*Worf takes out his phaser and blows Commander Riker away*

Posted: **Sun Oct 04, 2009 10:25 pm**

Jean-Luc: Beverly, I haven't exactly been forward with you. Before his departure from this ship, Wesley and I... got to know each other. Deeply. It was a bittersweet melange of Deliverance and Summer of 69, except with a lot more caca involved.

Posted: **Mon Oct 05, 2009 12:46 pm**

Scotty: I'm givin' all she's go... ah you know what, &^&$ it, If you haven't figured it out by now I always do what it takes than, screw it, I can'a be bothered anymore.

Posted: **Tue Oct 06, 2009 4:58 am**

Kirk: Spock I think you're being entirely illogical.
Bones: Jim are you feeling ok?
Spock: *raises eyebrow* your illogical statement as to the extent of my logic is not logical
Kirk: Oh can it goblin!
Spock: I loathe you...
Bones: Well at least we agree on something

Posted: **Wed Oct 07, 2009 11:57 am**

Captain Jean-Luc Picard: "Captain's log, star date ...................... Damn! Where has my Bondage Babes calendar gone?"

Posted: **Thu Oct 08, 2009 7:52 pm**

Tekka wrote:Picard: Mr. Worf, fire at will!

*Worf takes out his phaser and blows Commander Riker away*

Oh man, why didn't I use this one? #-o

I think of this everytime I watch "Best of Both Worlds" Part 1!

Posted: **Thu Oct 08, 2009 7:55 pm**

Neelix: Here's the list of races we'll be encountering over the next few weeks.

Janeway: Yes! Now, how can I piss these people off?

Posted: **Fri Oct 09, 2009 5:17 am**

SentinelA wrote:
Tekka wrote:Picard: Mr. Worf, fire at will!

*Worf takes out his phaser and blows Commander Riker away*

Oh man, why didn't I use this one? I think of this everytime I watch "Best of Both Worlds" Part 1!

Me too...

Kirk: There's somthing on the wing!! Some.... thing!!!

Posted: **Sun Oct 11, 2009 1:59 pm**

Kirk: There's somthing on the wing!! Some.... thing!!![/quote]

Bones: No doubt it came from your crotch, you man-whore!

Posted: **Thu Nov 26, 2009 3:58 pm**

Q: d'oh!

Picard (to Counselor Troi): Say hello to your mother for me.

Worf: Sorry I'm late, but I had to take my son to his ballet class.

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:33 pm**

Sisko: Station log supplemental. Before meeting with the Cardassian representative I must confer with Admiral Ackbar.

Ackbar: Be sure to take extra precautions Captain Sisko, just in case IT'S A TRAP.

Sisko cuts off view screen: One line in that damn movie and we have to hear it all the freaking time!

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:38 pm**

SentinelA wrote:Sisko: Station log supplemental. Before meeting with the Cardassian representative I must confer with Admiral Ackbar.

Ackbar: Be sure to take extra precautions Captain Sisko, just in case IT'S A TRAP.

Sisko cuts off view screen: One line in that damn movie and we have to hear it all the freaking time!

LOL.

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:46 pm**

*********************WARNING: COULD BE OFFENSIVE TO FRENCH PEOPLE**************************************

ENCOUNTER AT FARPOINT.

Worf: Sir, with all due respect our only option IS to fight.

Yar: Fight, or try to escape.

Picard: I am a Frenchman! We're going to run!

HIDE AND Q

Worf: Sir their uniforms may appear human but they are infact pig-people.

Riker: So they ARE French!
****************************If you are French and offended by this just remember that I'm a stupid American and I'm sorry!

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:50 pm**

ENCOUNTER AT FARPOINT: Q just put up the barrier infront of the Enterprise

Picard: Why do I all of the sudden feel like a Mexican at the American border?

*************If you are Mexican and are offended by this joke...ah the hell with it!****Sorry!

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:55 pm**

SentinelA wrote:ENCOUNTER AT FARPOINT: Q just put up the barrier infront of the Enterprise

Picard: Why do I all of the sudden feel like a Mexican at the American border?

*************If you are Mexican and are offended by this joke...ah the hell with it!****Sorry!

Wouldn't that mean he can easily get through the barrier?

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 7:59 pm**

*Ghost Kirk to Picard* Use the Force, Jean-Luc.

Sisko. "I feel a disturbance in the Celestial Temple."

Dukat. "Powaah! Unwimited powahh!"

Female Changeling. "Fear will keep the Alpha Quadrant in line. Fear of the Dominion."

Posted: **Tue Jan 12, 2010 9:42 pm**

Kirk: My diaper is stinky! ;;)

Spock:

Posted: **Wed Jan 13, 2010 4:06 pm**

May the Force be with you

Posted: **Thu Jan 14, 2010 2:05 am**

Picard, "Riker....did you tape Gossip Girl this week?"

Posted: **Thu Jan 14, 2010 2:11 am**

Kira, "Emissary? I seriously doubt Hawk from Spencer for Hire is our Emissary."

The Energon Pub

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