The Energon Pub

Dear Hasbro,

To put it bluntly, we're breaking up. We've had a good run, but I've left you for the 3rd parties. You just haven't been doing much to keep me excited about our relationship. You seduced me when I was just a little kid, with your wonderful your G1 Transformers, and I stuck with you, all the way through growing into a man who could afford to be a true toy aficionado. G1 was wonderful, Beast Wars was wonderful, but around the time that you released RID, I started yearning for a recreation of my beloved G1 characters with full blown modern toy technology. Since that time, you have teased me, but failed to deliver in a way that satisfies my needs and desires.

How many god-damned Optimus Prime figures have I purchased over the years? Yet I can't look at a single one and say "I never need to buy another Optimus figure again." You got close with the Masterpiece versions, but they're too big to interact with my "CHUG" figures. And do you remember the incident with that giant Powerglide figure? I bought the ugly gray thing, but then you turned around and released a repaint that more closely invoked the original, so I bought that too. Then you released the tiny Dark of the Moon version so I bought that too, and you know what? Looking at all three figures, I can't think to myself "I never need to buy another Powerglide."

Ok, I will admit that we did have some good times. I can look at my Battle In Space Cyclonus and think "I never need to buy another Cyclonus again." The same goes for my Generations Kup and Jazz. But those are flukes, and for each success story, there are so many others characters whom I've purchased 8 different and expensive versions of, that just end up sitting in a box sucking in silence.

I tried to make it work Hasbro, I really did. I learned how to paint, sculpt, dremel, and dye, but I'm just not the artist that I hoped I would be and I'm not a factory machine. My paints peel and flake, my sculpting is uneven, and my dremeling has resulted in more than one injury. Don't even get me started on the dyes. The boiling water burns, the acetone melts everything, and the dye is so strong that it seeps through the details I painstakingly paint after the job is done.

Last night an envelope arrived at my door. Inside that envelope I found I-Gear's versions of Huffer and Seaspray. I stuck some Repro-Labels autobot insignias on their chests and took a good long look. These wonderfully articulated little beauties, who actually resemble their G1 cartoon counterparts, made me squee aloud for the first time in a long time. I immediately knew I'd never have to buy another Seaspray or Huffer. While not perfect, these were good enough versions to represent those characters on my shelf forever. I squeed man...I really squeed.

You rarely make me squee Hasbro, you rarely do, but some Asian guys with too much time on their hands managed to make me do it for $20. You might try to tell me how much cheaper your product is, dear Hasbro, but the bottom line is that buying 19 different versions of your characters and having to paint, dremel, and sculpt, only to achieve mediocre results makes you much more expensive and much less satisfying in the long run.

In closing, we've had our fun Hasbro, and I'm sure that we'll meet again from time to time, but I've become a whore for the 3rd parties and there's nothing that you can do to change that. You didn't hold up our end of the relationship. I've made up my mind to move on. If you need me, you can find me in a hotel room with I-Gear, Fansproject, Headrobots, Junkion Blacksmith, and whoever else I damned well feel like being entertained by.

All the best,

Mr. Creative Name

In fairness, not all 3rd party companies and products are made the same.

Impossibletoy's products tend to be unsatisfying (which is sad for me to say since I like their Quint line). iGear's early works are equally unsatisfying and some of their stuff are just KOs of Hasbro's products.

And Hercules, while amazing, is plagued with QC issues. I've heard of issues with one of FP's Insecticons too. For such pricey figs, these issues are a detriment. I'm just glad they're being addressed. But it wasn't so with iGear's early stuff.

And hobody has made a decent replacement head for City Commander (reserving judgement on Wu's set) and he, Protector, and the Crossfire sets all need Hasbro products to actually work. I mean I love FP's stuff, but credit where it's due. Many of their most amazing works would not have been possible if not or Hasbro's already released products.

PE is also great at making TFs, but ... they're tiny and EXPENSIVE. I have Scouting force and the size is a serious detriment. For about $100 they ought to be good.

And expense is really a big thing. The average deluxe is about $14 and most of the ones I've bought I've been very satisfied with. I do not want to spend $100 on each and every figure I buy. I mean ... even Dr. Wu's faces cost $20. The 3rd arty products are great, but pricey.

So I'll stay with Hasbro when I want to. But they should know that this is an open relationship.

I actually completely agree with you on all points, I was just having a bit of fun by writing Hasbro a Dear John letter.

mrcreativename wrote:I actually completely agree with you on all points, I was just having a bit of fun by writing Hasbro a Dear John book.

Fixed

I gotta tell you mrcreativename, as I read your plight I was thinking of the song "Through the years" by Kenny Rogers with a type of grin while reading your break up with Hasbro. Don't know Kenny Rogers then at least Google the lyrics and see. I guess all I can offer to you is if you feel the need to reconcile your relationship with Hasbro consider an open relationship or perhaps a simple FWB if you will.

I've been scared many times by that bitch Hasbro but that's cuz I confused lust for love. But now I choose who I want some luv'n from Hasbro or 3rd party, and never stay chained to one or the other for too long. Well there is my 2 cents with no sense to you and as the great Jerry Springer says, "take care of yourself and each other".

Don't let the door hit your butt on the way out! Hasbro's got enough other lovers; they won't even notice you're gone.



Speaking of Kenny Rogers, your rant reminds me of the Kenny Rogers Roasters episode of Seinfeld, when Kramer got pissed at the restaurant because their sign was annoying him, so he vowed to never eat there again. When the store closed down, he realized how much he missed their delicious chicken, and came crawling on his knees, begging them to come back. That'll be you soon.

In case my second point didn't make things clear enough, I was just having a bit of fun by writing a break up letter to Hasbro because I thought the I-Gear mini-bots were so very cool. Obviously Hasbro and I will continue seeing each other, as my parents would expect me to bring Hasbro to Christmas dinner. I'm just saying the third parties I've been cavorting with are way more fun to play around with.

First, welcome aboard.

Second, in this case, maybe you shouldn't even post that first post just for fun. It's your choice and nobody force you to buy anything.

paul053 wrote:First, welcome aboard.

Second, in this case, maybe you shouldn't even post that first post just for fun. It's your choice and nobody force you to buy anything.

First, your customs are awesome.

Second, I've been on the Allspark since Beast Wars and am just sick and tired of their take everything way too seriously and not let anyone have any fun attitude. I suppose it's just a symptom of the message board hive mentality sadly. Did no one find my letter amusing at all? Was it that hard to relate to? What do you do with your 50 lesser Optimus Prime toys?

I enjoyed your Dear John letter very much and am in a similar boat. My friend Froy just dropped off my Rager & Spray yesterday (they were late Christmas/birthday gifts) and I put them up with with my Classics Autobots and they fit great! I dug out my DOTM Powerglide to put with them on the shelf and thought "that will work until I can get a third party one" like just about everyone else. Since I didnt really need anything from DOTM, the only things I've gotten in 6 months from Hasbro are Junkheap and Black Shadow. There are other Classicverse figures I need to get but nothing new. This years so far, all that has me interested are TF:Prime Bulkhead and 3 figures from Botcon.

I'm not breaking up with Hasbro, we're just on a break!

This year though, I'm looking forward to getting Maketoys Tanker & Giant, the other two notInsecticons I need from Fansproject, iGears Cosmos (and whatever the hell MW-03 turns out to be), and maybe a couple of things from Headrobots. This year is projected to be very light but very expensive!

I have tosay, though, that I have to temper myself with these 3rd party guys.

Like most people I bought grey Powerglide. Then we had two red versions come out. Now there's 2 legends sized versions and one deluxe version based off the seemingly-awsome Jazitoys mold. It was so tempting when it came out.

But then I have to stop myself. It's POWERGLIDE. I don't care too much about PG. Sometimes really great figs are very tempting, but I gotta stop myself and focus and guys I really care about.

As for the humerous tone ... yeah I guess it was lost on me too. There's too much Hasbro/Takara bitching around here at times, you know?

GuyIncognito wrote:Don't let the door hit your butt on the way out! Hasbro's got enough other lovers; they won't even notice you're gone.



Speaking of Kenny Rogers, your rant reminds me of the Kenny Rogers Roasters episode of Seinfeld, when Kramer got pissed at the restaurant because their sign was annoying him, so he vowed to never eat there again. When the store closed down, he realized how much he missed their delicious chicken, and came crawling on his knees, begging them to come back. That'll be you soon.

I love that episode of Seinfeld! Especially when Jerry starts acting more like Kramer and Kramer more like Jerry as a result of the restaurant... C'mon man the letter was amusing I thought and most of the souls here are pretty easy going so let the bitching about Hasbro go on!

The funny thing is I'm kinda feeling the opposite and am tempted to break up with 3rd Parties. I mean, 3P is hot as hell, but damn she's a gold diggin' beyotch!

These guys are doing a lot of things right, but I can't begin to tell you how tired I am of everything costing around $100 or more. When something comes along like the iGear Minibots for $15 shipped, that's pretty awesome...but that's also not the norm.

mrcreativename wrote:First, your customs are awesome.

Second, I've been on the Allspark since Beast Wars and am just sick and tired of their take everything way too seriously and not let anyone have any fun attitude. I suppose it's just a symptom of the message board hive mentality sadly. Did no one find my letter amusing at all? Was it that hard to relate to? What do you do with your 50 lesser Optimus Prime toys?

First, thanks.

Second, it did make me giggle at several points. I do agree with you at many points. But considering ultimately this is a toy line for kids, not aiming at us adults, I most of the time swallow what they have offered. I don't have much extra money to put on 3rd party stuffs, so I'm very selective on their products. Well, I'm also very selective on Hasbro's.

Kibble wrote:The funny thing is I'm kinda feeling the opposite and am tempted to break up with 3rd Parties. I mean, 3P is hot as hell, but damn she's a gold diggin' beyotch!

These guys are doing a lot of things right, but I can't begin to tell you how tired I am of everything costing around $100 or more. When something comes along like the iGear Minibots for $15 shipped, that's pretty awesome...but that's also not the norm.

I keep telling myself there are worse things I could do with that money... and there are definitely BETTER things I can do with that money. I still spend the money as I see fit, and try to curb other spending habits to afford.

Mr Creative Name: You may not be able to obtain your pinnacle Optimus Prime, but after RTS, do you ever need to buy a new Jazz?

Has/Tak proves they can do some things right, and 3P picks up when they can't... at least 50% of the time.

Right,
So I think everyone understands that Hasbro have to market for the kids these days, it's quite well understood. But to defend them and say that their products are in anyway quality is a joke! No paint and that tell-tale opague grey plastic parading itself as metal. Please. The last figure I bought from Hasbro was the 25th Anniversary Unicron. I bought it on a wimb as I don't collect Hasbro transformers. Maybe it's 'cause I live closer to Japan than The States but I've never had much of a strong relationship with Hasbro. Just Takara and third parties. But as for the figure, I never took it out of it's box. It was bundled up and put back on ebay. It just looked cheap. I've since bought the Takara version of Unicron and what a difference. The last of the Hasbro greats, for me, was the RID series. And it was all downhill from there (give or take a few) Could you imagine how awesome some of these movie figures would be with full paint and die-cast? I'd be broke!
But alas, we see amazing molds turned into toys made for a few cents...I can't say we should grow all up, we collect transformers! But we should at least leave Hasbro for the children, it seems that's where they wanna be anyway.

And there we have it, my current buying experience and this site all rolled into one handy-dandy bite sized thread.

Those of you that don't like posts of more than a few lines can just skip right over......

I've been buying Hasbro since 84, stuck with the Generation break, bought Beast Wars (which for the most part I loved as a show, and about 40% of the toys were great) went through the Vehicle rebirth and ended up with a bunch of crappy, ugly movies that made me want to burn everything Hasbro and Dreamworks to the floor - and still stuck with it because I was getting Masterpieces and Classics - the toys I realy wanted from the first time around being made with today's tech and production methods.

And MP1 Prime is STILL probably the greatest Toy I'm likely to buy, the Star Wars Big Mil Falcon pushes it close but it's still my favourite. MP Grimlock comes in third.

But since the Movieverse came and camped out on TRU shelves with near endless Bumblebee tedium there has been a shrinking amount of Hasbro products I actually want to buy. The Generations/RTS surge of 2010 got me a bunch of great toys - and RTS Jazz is the Greatest Deluxe TF ever - but since that tap turned off there has been 2 repaints and zip.

This Month I've bought the two last parts of Herc, IGears Minis (frikking sweet!!) Maketoys Hover and Bomber, X-Trans Devy Upgrade and am about to pull the trigger on the pre-order for PE's Not -Quite Arcee and Maketoys Giant. That's a huge pile of money that Hasbro can't/wont/don't want get their hands on. All you Hasbro-to-the-death types might just want to pause on that point......

I've bought everything FP have put out, most of PE's stuff, Herc and while there are QC issues in that list ALL of them represent DEFINITIVE versions of characters i wont ever have to buy again. Isn't that the point.

AS to the OP writing a book or ranting....? Did senses of humor and attention spans really drop that far? I hope not.

And Hastak: Step up to the plate Guys...you're getting killed by about 15 guys in China at present.

Open Relationships are In this century.

Are we really making this Hasbro VS Takara? There are some Hasbro-released TFs I do like the Takara version for more, but in the end the engineering is exactly the same.

Anyhow, since there's another long pause in the Generations line I'm happy to buy more 3rd party stuff.

However! I think there should be a clear difference in people's minds when they pay $14 for a TF and $50 for a TF of the same size from Takara or a 3rd party. I mean, I'd hope the $50 TF is better in quality.

BeastProwl wrote:

mrcreativename wrote:I actually completely agree with you on all points, I was just having a bit of fun by writing Hasbro a Dear John book.

Fixed

You must be a comic book reader.

Blurrz wrote:Dear mrcreativename,

We appreciate your concern for one of our intellectual properties. At this current point in time we cannot share with you what our plans for the future of this brand will be. However we can tell you that regardless of your opinion or any fan's opinion, we will make toy waves sent to your hometown have the following contents

• 6x Bumblebee
• 1x Character you really want
• 1x The other character you really want

We sincerely thank you for spending hundreds upon hundreds of countless dollars on our products and wish that you will do the same in the near future.

Love,
Typical Hasbro PR Response


Welcome to the boards champ! And feel free to speak your mind on the boards, it's what we're all about.

What we're experiencing is, ultimately, part of the double-edged sword of the toy market dominance by media-driven megafranchises.

Back in the beginning tie-in shows like Transformers, G.I. Joe and He-Man featured large casts that frequently introduced new characters as new toys came to market.

This created a problem: there was little characterization beyond the stereotypical 'gimmick' that defined a given character's identity, which made for some pretty unsatisfactory storytelling, especially as the casts became larger and larger and prominent characters fell by the wayside as the need to promote newer characters/toys took precedence.

Over time, as competition increased between different brands with tie-ins, the emphasis on quality storytelling in the tie-ins increased, which necessitated a smaller core cast so that greater characterization could be focused upon. While this generally did result in a vast improvement in the watchability of the tie-ins it also created a different problem: all but that core cast was, by neceessity, fairly obscure. This resulted in parents only being familiar with a few characters and children clamoring for their favorites or, more particularly, in buyers for massive chains only being at best familiar with a few characters and thus demanding that assortments reflect what they think will sell.

I don't think Hasbro is particularly happy with this turn of events, but I'm not sure exactly what they can do about it at this point. WalMart gets what WalMart wants.

(Michael Bay's decision to only offer significant character development to a handful of robot in the film series was not particularly helpful in this regard, especially since the extremely busy robot designs made it difficult to tell many of the characters apart.)

Clone Wars seems to have done the best job in getting out of this trap, but I'm pretty convinced that this is because it's Star Wars and because it's fairly cost-effective to crank out endless variations of Clone Troopers that are sort-of individuals but are still recognizable to parents, along with having an almost endless well of bizarre alien designs to mix things up with.

In summary: meh.

I dig the humor in the original post. Welcome to the boards.

I own exactly one thrid-party product. My brother bought me a trailer for Classics Prime.

I have been tempted by other products, but never buy them. Too expensive for me.

I think Hasbro does a nice job with their products. Are there figures I would have done differently? Sure. Overall, I am happy with the products we got from them. I am happy they did the entire Classics line. As long as they keep remaking Classics characters, I will keep buying them.

necr0blivion wrote:

Kibble wrote:The funny thing is I'm kinda feeling the opposite and am tempted to break up with 3rd Parties. I mean, 3P is hot as hell, but damn she's a gold diggin' beyotch!

These guys are doing a lot of things right, but I can't begin to tell you how tired I am of everything costing around $100 or more. When something comes along like the iGear Minibots for $15 shipped, that's pretty awesome...but that's also not the norm.

I keep telling myself there are worse things I could do with that money... and there are definitely BETTER things I can do with that money. I still spend the money as I see fit, and try to curb other spending habits to afford.

Mr Creative Name: You may not be able to obtain your pinnacle Optimus Prime, but after RTS, do you ever need to buy a new Jazz?

Has/Tak proves they can do some things right, and 3P picks up when they can't... at least 50% of the time.

On the Jazz question, I agree with you, it's in my break up letter. I wrote "I can look at my Battle In Space Cyclonus and think "I never need to buy another Cyclonus again." The same goes for my Generations Kup and JAZZ. But those are flukes, and for each success story, there are so many others characters whom I've purchased 8 different and expensive versions of, that just end up sitting in a box sucking in silence."