Heavy Metal War - The Ultimate Online Battle Between Good and Evil

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TECH SPECS

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ALTERNATE MODE

Class:	Heavy Rescue Vehicle
Desc:	Nissan Onebox Vanette Ambulance

PERFORMANCE SUMMARY	[Detail]

Mission:

25%

Arena:

50%

Kills:

237 (0.04 per day)

OVERALL GAME RANK
Not currently ranked.

Big Heavy Thing

"Unyielding resolve beats the snot out of me. Actually, everything does."

Level 1 Autobot


Team:	The Ineptibots v0.3
Commander:	Me, Grimlock!
Faction:	Autobot
Level:	1
Total XP:	82,395xp
Weapon:
Doing:	Inactive

Big Heavy Thing's Bio

[ Profile, the Likes of Which You Have Never Seen! ]

Here he comes! He's big! He's mighty! He's nigh indefinable! He's Big Heavy Thing, currently being brought up on malpractice charges for affixing several unwanted taillights to Omega Supreme's spleen! Brutish and nuts, he loves to goad epileptic Autobots into Jazz's sound-and-light show! How many times can I use an exclamation point? Hu-SSAH!

Unfortunately, the story continues! Introducing Big Heavy Thing v2.0!
Burnimus Prime has ordered Big Heavy Thing be retooled because he kept screwing things up and cleaning up Bubbatron's bedroom and now Bubbatron can't find his stash and you know how it is and--
Enter: Big Heavy Thing v2.0, now the most angst-ridden git this side of Huffer! Now as a *bigger* screw-up, he's not so much of a nerd anymore, cuz he was really startin' to freak everyone out with that brainiac medical thing of his. At least he doesn't try and diagnose, like, every single dented freakin' fender.

Wears a little clown outfit in combat so's he can distract the Decepticons into thinking, "Hey. A clown. In combat. How festive." Time will tell if he's still a little wuss.

And then some! Now, Big Heavy Thing v3.0: bigger... heavier... thingier... unevolve...di...er... or something. Exudes more fuel than any two octane freights combined. Damages more layers of o-zone than Fortress Maximus' silent-but-deadlies. Now in the form of a battlestation, he crawls across desert landscapes at the speed it takes a Dinobot to calculate complex arithmetic. He attacks with the encumbered action of Manterror's freaking legs getting in the way all the time. He plays a guitar just like he's ringing a bell. But now he sports a really cool highschool blazer.

Big Heavy Thing v1.0: He's back to being a sucky ambulance. But he's still big, heavy, and thing. I mean, *a* thing.

And, after all this, he still does everyone's taxes.

[ No-Nonsense, Commercialistic Upgrade! ]

Now a 'special' mailaway offer Omnibot, his only advantage is that he has become the first Cybertronian mail-order bride! Get him while he's single!

[ Lowly, Lowly Weaknesses! ]

He still has at least €30,000 left on his school debt. And he mismatches his socks.

[ Mind-Numbing Gestalt Action! ]

Becomes the left arm of the Ineptibot gestalt, Clumsy Oaf.