The Energon Pub

A couple of silly biographies have caught my eye recently.

Universe Blast Off (part of Combaticons): arrogant loner astronaut. He transforms into a tank!

Bumblebee prepares for battle against Ravage and Insecticon. Insecticon is as big as the end of a human's finger.

Any of you guys have any other stupid ones to share?

G1 Motormaster

"Seeks to destroy Optimus Prime so he can claim to be "King of the Road"".

Slaggin' toy was half the size of Optimus in truck mode. At least Actionmaster Prime was closer in scale to him.

PIPES has a pretty silly techspec.

"Fascinated by seemingly worthless human gadgetry-carrot juicers,musical wristwatches,electrical hair combers, etc. collects them in unused corener of ark creating mini museum of American consumerism."
WHAT? so retarded....but whatever.

Another i've noticed is Hot Rods and Rodimus Primes techspecs....
they both have the same rank 10
same strength 10
same intelligence 10
same speed 9
same endurance 9
Courage Hotrod 7 Rodimus 10
firepower Hotrod 10 Rodimus 9
same skill 10

Seems to me they are exactly the same.....accept the courage department...seems to me that they should be switched around. HotRod was the wild and fearless one....Rodimus......not so much.
Plus HotRod has better firepower.
Does this seem wrong to you or is it just me?

I always thought G1 Broadside had the stupidest bio of them all.

"Doesn't like transforming into carrier or jet -- gets seasick on water, has fear of heights. Effective, valiant warrior, but other Autobots wish he wouldn't gripe so much. Expands to 1200ft length as carrier, capable of landing jets and carrying other Autobots. 15,000 mile range, 40 knots maximum speed. Projects 80,000 volt electric field around himself in jet mode. Has high-energy plasma-pulse gun and shattering vibro-ax in robot mode."


Basically, they decided that since Silverbolt had a fear of heights, but was made the Aerialbot commander to keep his mind off it, and became a rather interesting character... MORE PHOBIAS = MORE INTERESTING! Except they made him practically useless in doing so.

Swerve had a pretty crap bio

His was : IfAutobots had drivers licenses, his would be revoked. A menace on highways. Dosent pay attetion to where he's going or the orders he's being given- easily distracted by anything. Hand's sensors can determine physical and chemical properties of metals. Goes 120 mph range 500 miles in car mode. Gets into lots of accidents.

To be honest this is the bio that frustrates me the most coz i mean look at it how the f@#k has this idiot not been blown away by a decepticon yet if he dosent pay attention or follows orders what kind of soldier does that in a war.
This is easily one of the worst bios out

monstergrotusque wrote:PIPES has a pretty silly techspec.

"Fascinated by seemingly worthless human gadgetry-carrot juicers,musical wristwatches,electrical hair combers, etc. collects them in unused corener of ark creating mini museum of American consumerism."
WHAT? so retarded....but whatever.

Another i've noticed is Hot Rods and Rodimus Primes techspecs....
they both have the same rank 10
same strength 10
same intelligence 10
same speed 9
same endurance 9
Courage Hotrod 7 Rodimus 10
firepower Hotrod 10 Rodimus 9
same skill 10

Seems to me they are exactly the same.....accept the courage department...seems to me that they should be switched around. HotRod was the wild and fearless one....Rodimus......not so much.
Plus HotRod has better firepower.
Does this seem wrong to you or is it just me?

No it's not just you. That is totally lame. I agree with everything you say.

thadicon wrote:Swerve had a pretty crap bio

His was : IfAutobots had drivers licenses, his would be revoked. A menace on highways. Dosent pay attetion to where he's going or the orders he's being given- easily distracted by anything. Hand's sensors can determine physical and chemical properties of metals. Goes 120 mph range 500 miles in car mode. Gets into lots of accidents.

To be honest this is the bio that frustrates me the most coz i mean look at it how the f@#k has this idiot not been blown away by a decepticon yet if he dosent pay attention or follows orders what kind of soldier does that in a war.
This is easily one of the worst bios out

Yeah, I guess he's the happy go lucky comic element that pays no attention or hasn't got a clue but miraculously manages to save the day like Inspector Clueseau or Ja Ja Binx.

Oh yeah, another two:

Blurr is supposedly the fastest. Does that mean he can drive faster than a jet can fly?

Brawn is supposed to be the strongest. Does that mean he's stronger than Omega Supreme?

Mykltron wrote:Oh yeah, another two:

Blurr is supposedly the fastest. Does that mean he can drive faster than a jet can fly?

Brawn is supposed to be the strongest. Does that mean he's stronger than Omega Supreme?

If you add the qualifier "for his size", I could easily see Brawn as the strongest.

And I could see Blurr as the fastest LAND mode, and in robot mode. And considering Animated Blurr managed to exceed lightspeed...

Blasphemy! How dare you question Bob Budiansky's bios? Joke. Really, those bios and specs are quite funny and confusing. Take the Sunstreaker/Sideswipe switch or the mix up with Starscream,Skywarp and Thundercracker.

And Hotrods downgrade from his cavalier days to Rodimus Prime to Targetmaster, loosing the Matrix severely underpowered him.

Valandar wrote:

Mykltron wrote:Oh yeah, another two:

Blurr is supposedly the fastest. Does that mean he can drive faster than a jet can fly?

Brawn is supposed to be the strongest. Does that mean he's stronger than Omega Supreme?

If you add the qualifier "for his size", I could easily see Brawn as the strongest.

And I could see Blurr as the fastest LAND mode, and in robot mode. And considering Animated Blurr managed to exceed lightspeed...

Yeah, I always wondered if the qualifiers were supposed to be in there, even as a kid.

He exceeded lightspeed? I haven't seen the last season yet.

fenrir72 wrote:Blasphemy! How dare you question Bob Budiansky's bios? Joke. Really, those bios and specs are quite funny and confusing. Take the Sunstreaker/Sideswipe switch or the mix up with Starscream,Skywarp and Thundercracker.

Care to explain?

Windsweeper wrote:G1 Motormaster

"Seeks to destroy Optimus Prime so he can claim to be "King of the Road"".

Slaggin' toy was half the size of Optimus in truck mode. At least Actionmaster Prime was closer in scale to him.

Conversely, Optimus only changes into a cab, while Motormaster transformers into both a cab and a trailer...he should be 3 or 4 times the size of Optimus.

@Mykltron.
The Sunstreaker/Sideswipe switch, the seeker switch or the Hotrodimus downgrade?

Anyways concerning the twins, take a look at their specs and their accessories. Sideswipe has to "rocket pack" or pile divers but in their bios..........Sunstreaker on the other hand states his pulse canon IIRC and shoulder mounted missiles. Well in their 'bot mode look at their accessories.

The season #1 seekers, Starscream for instance, being Aircommander has himself ranked 5, speed less than 10 and yet he's supposed to be the fastest of the tetra jets while Skywarp and Thundercracker specs etc etc

Hotrodimus' specs, well just compare the downgrade of his Firepower and strength before his taking the Matrix and his returning it to Optimus and his targetmaster incarnation.

I've always thought it was lame that Universe Cyclonus "wields enough might to sterilize the surface of an inhabited world by himself", yet his fireblast rating was '7'. What the heck could a bot with '10' (like most incarnations of Prime or Mega/Galvatron) do? Even Starscream had a better rating of '8' with his Null-Rays, and all I've ever seen those do is stun another robot...

fenrir72 wrote:@Mykltron.
The Sunstreaker/Sideswipe switch, the seeker switch or the Hotrodimus downgrade?

Anyways concerning the twins, take a look at their specs and their accessories. Sideswipe has to "rocket pack" or pile divers but in their bios..........Sunstreaker on the other hand states his pulse canon IIRC and shoulder mounted missiles. Well in their 'bot mode look at their accessories.

The season #1 seekers, Starscream for instance, being Aircommander has himself ranked 5, speed less than 10 and yet he's supposed to be the fastest of the tetra jets while Skywarp and Thundercracker specs etc etc

Hotrodimus' specs, well just compare the downgrade of his Firepower and strength before his taking the Matrix and his returning it to Optimus and his targetmaster incarnation.

I was asking about the twins and seekers. Thanks for clearing that up for me!

Autobot Strider wrote:I've always thought it was lame that Universe Cyclonus "wields enough might to sterilize the surface of an inhabited world by himself", yet his fireblast rating was '7'. What the heck could a bot with '10' (like most incarnations of Prime or Mega/Galvatron) do? Even Starscream had a better rating of '8' with his Null-Rays, and all I've ever seen those do is stun another robot...

That's funny, all I've ever seen him do is shoot over people's heads! Yes, a valid point though.

Generations prime "will never surrender until the Decepticons are defeated". Yeah? Who will he surrender to?

Mykltron wrote:Generations prime "will never surrender until the Decepticons are defeated". Yeah? Who will he surrender to?

Well, Optimus surrenders almost as much as he dies... He surrendered to Megatron (when he killed innocents in a video game, resulting in his death); Scorponok (Marvel Comics) and to humans (IDW)

Chaoslock wrote:

Mykltron wrote:Generations prime "will never surrender until the Decepticons are defeated". Yeah? Who will he surrender to?

Well, Optimus surrenders almost as much as he dies... He surrendered to Megatron (when he killed innocents in a video game, resulting in his death); Scorponok (Marvel Comics) and to humans (IDW)

I see. So after defeating the Deceps he'll surrender to some random group?

I can see it now:
Prime: I've defeated the Decepticons!
Prowl: Surrender, Optimus!
Prime: Righto!