Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor"

Posted by i_amtrunks Nov 25, 2008 at 10:31pm CST 18,839 views

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The Universe of the Transformers is vast, and populated by many characters. Their universe is a large tapestry, made up of the stories and points of view of countless experiences that serve the larger whole.

These are some of those stories. This is:
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It should be noted that while this project has been recognized by IDW Publishing and Hasbro, none of the works presented have been commissioned or solicited by either company. The stories are not official canon, except where noted. These stories are the result of Transformers enthusiasts taking the time out of their busy days to contribute to a universe they love. No one has been paid for the production of these stories.

CHEETOR

Written by;
Clinton “Tahu Prime” Avery

Art by;
Cody “Cryo Prime” Avery

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Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by neutralstate Nov 25, 2008

hmm... i think the story could have done with some more fleshing out :/

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by Sabrblade Nov 26, 2008

I am Vengeance. I am the Night. I am... BATM- whoops wrong lines.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by mechajol Nov 26, 2008

story? there's a story? where? i thought cheetor was just introducing himself to all of us...

i mean, seriously, WTF!?

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by proximus Nov 26, 2008

...he is also very brief.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by First Gen Nov 26, 2008

As Sabrblade jested above, its a play off of Batman.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by Dreadwinglord Nov 26, 2008

This is teribble! What the hell? It's just Cheetor runnin' around shootin stuff.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by WhiteRabbit Nov 26, 2008

Everybody keep in mind that not everyone who's contributed to this project is a 30 year old, life-long Transformers fan with years and years of creative endeavors under their belts.

This project has its parameters, yes, but we saw no need to close it off to the franchise's younger enthusiasts.

How about showing a bit of class and offering these lads some useful feedback rather than spewing over-reactions?

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by First Gen Nov 26, 2008

WhiteRabbit wrote:Everybody keep in mind that not everyone who's contributed to this project is a 30 year old, life-long Transformers fan with years and years of creative endeavors under their belts.

This project has its parameters, yes, but we saw no need to close it off to the franchise's younger enthusiasts.

How about showing a bit of class and offering these lads some useful feedback rather than spewing over-reactions?

My apologies to you WhiteRabbit and the Mosaic crew. Sometimes we lose sight of whats going on beneath and only see what is in front of our eyes. Personally I thought the strip was rather clever, as I am a huge Batman fan. Mixing TF's and Batman would be my dream, but alas, HASBRO does not own the rights to the Caped Crusader.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by Autobot Cheetor Nov 26, 2008

Aside from my bias thoughts about it, I like it :mrgreen:

. I dont know if the writer was going for the Batman thing but it did give me that Batty feeling lol, and the way the artist drew cheetor was cute. One thing I thought would be constructive to say was maybe on the next one if you choose to highlight that sketchy look try to use less bright and flat colors while inking, it tends to for lack of a better term, look funny. Water colors look great with that sketchy look, ok thats my two cents. Great mosaic, keep it up!

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by Tigertrack Nov 26, 2008

I dig the art. It has its place, and I love the detail in the robot mode of the transformation pic. Makes me wish I had more time to draw/sketch again.

As for the writing, not every piece has to try to cram in tons of dialogue to be effective. This could very well be when he came online, and his first transformation. Personally being an artist (formerly), the story should be able to be told as much through the art as the dialogue, and I think this piece effectively uses both.

I like the simplicity of it, and I think the arts sketchy-ness and none too complex coloring support the dialogue well.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by Covenant Nov 26, 2008

Apologies, but this one is just bad. There's all of three inner monologue balloons and they tell essentially nada. There's no story here, no point. Especially with the transformation and shooting for no apparent reason. And the art? Eh.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by Sledge Nov 26, 2008

WhiteRabbit wrote:Everybody keep in mind that not everyone who's contributed to this project is a 30 year old, life-long Transformers fan with years and years of creative endeavors under their belts.

This project has its parameters, yes, but we saw no need to close it off to the franchise's younger enthusiasts.

How about showing a bit of class and offering these lads some useful feedback rather than spewing over-reactions?

What difference does age make? I have no idea how old the people are who've made any of these things, and I don't care. It's irrelevant. And I think people pointing out that this didn't have a story and therefore seems pretty pointless is a useful piece of feedback. It's certainly the sort of thing I'd appreciate having pointed out about anything I've written.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by King Slick Nov 26, 2008

WEAK! It sure needed a lot more to it.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by 1337W422102 Nov 26, 2008

If it was going to be a Batman joke, they should have used "What are you, dense? Retarded or something? I'm the goddamn Batman!" Best Batman line evar!

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by mechajol Nov 26, 2008

WhiteRabbit wrote:Everybody keep in mind that not everyone who's contributed to this project is a 30 year old, life-long Transformers fan with years and years of creative endeavors under their belts.

This project has its parameters, yes, but we saw no need to close it off to the franchise's younger enthusiasts.

How about showing a bit of class and offering these lads some useful feedback rather than spewing over-reactions?

Sorry if I offended you, but I agree with this guy here.

Covenant wrote:Apologies, but this one is just bad. There's all of three inner monologue balloons and they tell essentially nada. There's no story here, no point.

I think the point of the mosaic is to feature another dimension to these fictional characters. To make things much more interesting. I've read mosaic strips that portrayed Tracks as some sorta secret assassin, heck, some stories even stretched so far and suggested Soundwave as Prime and Magnus's long-lost brother. See? Interesting.

Now, Cheetor. Yeah, he's fast, yeah he's stealthy. And what? Whoah! His name is Cheetor! Wow! What a twist! I never would have guessed that from the title alone!

I mean, I might as well draw Optimus Prime on the street, cruisng then transforming and say "I'm Red." "I'm a truck." "I'm Optimus Prime." But then, so what?

Sledge wrote:What difference does age make? I have no idea how old the people are who've made any of these things, and I don't care. It's irrelevant. And I think people pointing out that this didn't have a story and therefore seems pretty pointless is a useful piece of feedback. It's certainly the sort of thing I'd appreciate having pointed out about anything I've written.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by Wingspan Nov 26, 2008

The Batman play is nice - although possibly more appropriate for other characters (e.g. Rattrap). To have improved this presentation, I'd recommend having Cheetor stalking someone and use more panels to give the feel of speed. For example, show him stalking Tarantulus back to his lair (I am stealthy), setting a charge (I am fast), and escaping with the exploding arachnid and his precious toys in the background (I am Cheetor) but use 2-3 panels for each part of the story. The above (using the art to tell the story - like tigertracks24 said) plus the feedback on how to make the coloring more dramatic (from Autobot Cheetor) could make a big difference.

I'd recommend giving these authors another shot if they desire; if they don't they still deserve praise for contributing. Any arm-chair authors/artists should show some respect to that - or produce something themselves. Blatant disrespect is inappropriate even if the bar is missed. The best mosaics will receive many posts of praise, the lesser will receive few or none; in other words, silence would have been better than venom.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by ACIDSTORM Nov 26, 2008

WhiteRabbit wrote:Everybody keep in mind that not everyone who's contributed to this project is a 30 year old, life-long Transformers fan with years and years of creative endeavors under their belts.

This project has its parameters, yes, but we saw no need to close it off to the franchise's younger enthusiasts.

How about showing a bit of class and offering these lads some useful feedback rather than spewing over-reactions?

who says you had to be 30 ?
anyway you'd have to be at least in your teens to have watched this programme ,so say a teenager drew it it's still really bad ,it has no story and its scruffy.i mean just luck at the black spots ,it looks like someone scribbled them in with a pencil you could have at least filled them in with paint. this is just my opinion and i'm trying to give ideas to help with art.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by atatcommander Nov 26, 2008

I agree with most people I think. The Batman reference is cool. but this could seriously use alot more. Bringing in the age and all in responce just made it worse i think. Its like saying "Up in the air, its a bird, no iits a plane, no its Starscream!" and just showing a pic of him. I have come to expect alot more from these, and this one doesn't live up to the hype. Sorry.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by Windsweeper Nov 26, 2008

I'm not sure why, but I like this. I like the style of the art.

I just can't believe someone compared Batman to Rattrap.

I could see Depth Charge as the modern gritty Batman or Silverbolt as the 60's Batman but never in a million years Rattrap. But's that because I find Rattrap to be one of the three most annoying TF's along with Quickstrike and Energon Ironhide. All 3 have voices that make Wheelie sound like Sean Connery.

Not trying to offend but I just don't see a link between Rattrap and Batman. But then I love Batman and hate Rattrap.

Anywho rant over, I do like the art in this.

Re: Transformers Mosaic: "Cheetor" (view post)

Comment by Deltaprime Nov 26, 2008

The Autobats wage their battles to destroy the evil forces of... the Jokercons! Okay, now that that's out of the way, I'd like to say that, sure, the dialogue was lacking. But back off people! Seriously, there's no need to be a jerk to someone over a webcomic!

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