10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

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10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Diem » Sun Feb 13, 2011 11:04 pm

In February of last year I made a list of 26 of what I felt were the greatest alt modes a Transformer could have. I was lucky enough to get a lot of positive feedback and a lot of great discussion, as well as requests to do something similar in the future.

So without any further ado iiiiiiit's:

10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Before I begin there are three conditions that I'm using to dictate eligibility for this list:

1.) Once again if anyone wants to write up any Honourable Mentions I'm sure everyone will want to see them, though this time around I'd like to hear your suggestions before you write them so we don't double up on any figures.
2.) The weirdness of the figures is neutralised depending on how much context has been produced to fit them in. For example the Dinobots are bloody weird, being as how they're robot dinosaurs on modern day Earth among cars and jets but because writers have worked so hard to explain them they would not be eligible for this list.
3.) Break is not eligible, simple because I already said enough about him on the last list.

Okay, let's go. Part 1

#10. Pepsi Convoy/Pepsi Prime

Who?

Let me set the scene. The year was 1985 and the only war fiercer than that between the Autobots and Decepticon was Pepsi vs. Coca Cola. For those of you who were fortunate enough to be born after perms went out of fashion I am being absolutely serious. The Coca Cola company, which was not satisfied with producing roughly 99.8% of all the world's teeth dissolver decided to undergo a massive rebranding project with a huge advertising budget to try to introduce New Coke to the world, while Pepsi threw their support behind the Autobot cause.

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Fighting Decepticons, injustice, thirst.

For a brief period there was a special mail-away offer where the regular Optimus Prime figure came with some extra stickers that demonstrated which side Prime had chosen in the Cola Wars. Sadly while the stickers did add a certain amount of verisimilitude to that whole "Robots in Disguise" thing, unless you got the Canadian version with the larger stickers the Autobot logo was still in plain sight. Prime's meant to be such a smart leader, you think he'd think of covering that up.

Image

Pictured: the perfect disguise.

So what's so weird about it anyway?

Enter Japan (you'll be hearing that a lot on this list).

Takara have never been shy of taking a good idea and running with it, to the moon. Come up with the tiniest hint of quirkiness and Japanese society will welcome it with open tentacles. And so Pepsi Convoy was born.

Image
Insane marketing ploys are the right of all sentient beings.

Image
All those Masterpiece Convoy repaints and this golden opportunity was missed.

That's right, it's Pepsi Convoy. A repaint of the G1 Optimus Prime robot with a brand new trailer designed to carry one Pepsi bottle, three cans or eight bottle caps and a new CO2 gun. Seriously, a CO2 gun. As in "One shall stand, one shall be carbonated" type CO2. In a profound example of attention to detail the Firepower stat on his Tech Specs was even reduced to reflect this fact.

Note-worthily, if Kiss Players is to be believed (and if any part of Transformers canon should be believed it's that) this figure isn't the actual real Convoy; he is in fact some random Autobot who uses the fine reputations of both Pepsi and Convoy to help the public perceptions of Autobots. Which just raises the question of who this random Autobot is who has all the strength, intelligence and leadership skills of regular Convoy but none of the marbles.

Thankfully Hasbro knew that American purchasers would never put up with that kind of oh wait no.

Image
The new Pepsi bottle as designed by Punch and Doubledealer

Yes, Pepsi Convoy was rererereleased in the States as Pepsi Optimus Prime, a release identical but for the updated Pepsi logo because when you're making a figure of a lorry pulling a drink bottle the size of a houseboat realism is paramount.

Oddly, unlike his Japanese counterpart, Pepsi Prime is the real actual Optimus Prime after having seemingly taken a few too many fusion blasts to the cpu. According to his on-box bio he is using a new disguise to keep the Autobot presence on Earth a secret (as you can see from the image above it's his best idea since agreeing to play sudden death video games with Megatron) with the added bonus that it supposedly, and I quote, "lets him hook up his fellow Autobots with some free Earth delicacies they rarely get to enjoy." So...wait, is he picking up deliveries from the Pepsi brewery using his disguise then pilfering them? Because that's amazing.

Well I hope that for you, like for me, the word Pepsi has now lost all meaning.

#10: Honourable Weirdness

Image
iPrime

Image
MacPrime

So wait, he's white but he's not Ultra Magnus? Is he pulling a giant iPod, or is he a tiny truck?

Well that's the end for this entry, but next time we'll be taking a closer look at someone else...

So for now, let the battle be here, on this strange primitive world. And let it be called...the 10 Weirdest Toys list!
Last edited by Diem on Mon Feb 14, 2011 10:20 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby El Duque » Sun Feb 13, 2011 11:15 pm

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Awesome, glad you're doing another one of these.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby OptiMagnus » Sun Feb 13, 2011 11:19 pm

Motto: ""Close your mouth and open your mind.""
Weapon: Gatling Cannon
How 'bout anything that was part of "Kiss Players"?
Pepsi Convoy is very random and outlandish, but I almost considered buying the newest version when it came out. (I'm a big fan of Pepsi.)
I thought the Pretender toys were a little strange too.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby El Duque » Sun Feb 13, 2011 11:23 pm

Motto: "I ain't got time to bleed!"
Weapon: Gattling Gun
Kiss Players certainly belong on any list of weird TF's.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Diem » Sun Feb 13, 2011 11:32 pm

OptiMagnus10 wrote:How 'bout anything that was part of "Kiss Players"?
Pepsi Convoy is very random and outlandish, but I almost considered buying the newest version when it came out. (I'm a big fan of Pepsi.)
I thought the Pretender toys were a little strange too.
Kiss Players? You mean the robot that turns into a car, the robot who turns into a car or the robot who turns into a car? There may have been a lot of weirdness going on in Kiss Players but the toys weren't the strange part. Even their accessories made sense in context.

Believe me, I'm certainly not saying that Pepsi Convoy is a bad figure. He's very strange, but he's a fantastic figure and objectively very attractive. I sincerely wish there were a Masterpiece figure in his colours.

As for Pretenders, well maybe we will and maybe we won't see them on this list.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby El Duque » Sun Feb 13, 2011 11:42 pm

Motto: "I ain't got time to bleed!"
Weapon: Gattling Gun
Diem wrote:
OptiMagnus10 wrote:How 'bout anything that was part of "Kiss Players"?
Pepsi Convoy is very random and outlandish, but I almost considered buying the newest version when it came out. (I'm a big fan of Pepsi.)
I thought the Pretender toys were a little strange too.
Kiss Players? You mean the robot that turns into a car, the robot who turns into a car or the robot who turns into a car? There may have been a lot of weirdness going on in Kiss Players but the toys weren't the strange part. Even their accessories made sense in context.

Believe me, I'm certainly not saying that Pepsi Convoy is a bad figure. He's very strange, but he's a fantastic figure and objectively very attractive. I sincerely wish there were a Masterpiece figure in his colours.

As for Pretenders, well maybe we will and maybe we won't see them on this list.


True, the Kiss Player figures themselves weren't weird. The associated manga on the other hand.......
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby OptiMagnus » Sun Feb 13, 2011 11:46 pm

Motto: ""Close your mouth and open your mind.""
Weapon: Gatling Cannon
Diem wrote:
OptiMagnus10 wrote:How 'bout anything that was part of "Kiss Players"?
Pepsi Convoy is very random and outlandish, but I almost considered buying the newest version when it came out. (I'm a big fan of Pepsi.)
I thought the Pretender toys were a little strange too.
Kiss Players? You mean the robot that turns into a car, the robot who turns into a car or the robot who turns into a car? There may have been a lot of weirdness going on in Kiss Players but the toys weren't the strange part. Even their accessories made sense in context.

Believe me, I'm certainly not saying that Pepsi Convoy is a bad figure. He's very strange, but he's a fantastic figure and objectively very attractive. I sincerely wish there were a Masterpiece figure in his colours.

As for Pretenders, well maybe we will and maybe we won't see them on this list.

I don't know...maybe it's just the whole concept of Kiss Players that gets to me. Those toys would've been better off without the creepy girl accessories IMO.
I thought the same about Pepsi Prime as an MP! That would be so cool. He could include the trailer from MP-04 (is that the right one?) with a Pepsi paint job or maybe one like the newer release that holds soda bottles.
Problem is...LICENSING :twisted:
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby gema » Mon Feb 14, 2011 2:07 am

Motto: "Quis Custodiet Ipsos Custodes"
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nice read :APPLAUSE:
can i ask permission to copy this to another forum to share (with credit to you of course)

and also your 26 of the Greatest Alt Modes of All Time thread

thank you
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Mykltron » Mon Feb 14, 2011 4:36 am

Motto: "If I win again I'm still the champion. If you win HAH! that's just impossible.

Weapon: tea cup."
OptiMagnus10 wrote:I don't know...maybe it's just the whole concept of Kiss Players that gets to me. Those toys would've been better off without the creepy girl accessories IMO.


Well lucky for you they were also released without them!
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby fenrir72 » Mon Feb 14, 2011 6:22 am

Motto: "Power to the strong and the right!"
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What about the "masters" toy line? You've got head, target, brain and breast masters.

Micromasters don't count imho
Buy Official Hb/TakaraTitancityformers at retail price or else the 3rd party makers win!

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Btw, its been nearly a year now and TR Soundwave and Blaster aren't moving in the shelve of TRU, is that shelfwarming or what?


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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Diem » Mon Feb 14, 2011 8:13 am

gema wrote:nice read :APPLAUSE:
can i ask permission to copy this to another forum to share (with credit to you of course)

and also your 26 of the Greatest Alt Modes of All Time thread

thank you
Which forum?
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Andrius » Mon Feb 14, 2011 10:05 am

Glad to see you're at it again! Can't wait for the next one...
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby JelZe GoldRabbit » Mon Feb 14, 2011 10:14 am

Motto: "The only good is knowledge, and the only evil is ignorance."
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Nice read, and certainly overdue. One thing though: TFU.info does not allow hotlinking to their images (bolded so everyone else can realise that as well)
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Diem » Mon Feb 14, 2011 10:25 am

JelZe GoldRabbit wrote:Nice read, and certainly overdue. One thing though: TFU.info does not allow hotlinking to their images (bolded so everyone else can realise that as well)
Good call Jelze.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby RK_Striker_JK_5 » Mon Feb 14, 2011 4:01 pm

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Ah, Optimus sure was a shill in the 80's and today, wasn't he.
Not caring about scale since 1984. Just like Hasbro.

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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Optimum Supreme » Mon Feb 14, 2011 5:17 pm

Motto: "That's [not out yet/never came out] in my area."
Weapon: Nuclear Charged Fusion Cannon
Pepsi Optimus Prime needs a brother, Mountain Dew Ultra Magnus based on this.

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Give him the bottle carrying trailer in green instead of white, and of course change the bottle of pop from Pepsi to Dew.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Name_Violation » Mon Feb 14, 2011 7:10 pm

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cant wait to see the rest of the list
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby OptiMagnus » Mon Feb 14, 2011 9:33 pm

Motto: ""Close your mouth and open your mind.""
Weapon: Gatling Cannon
Mykltron wrote:
OptiMagnus10 wrote:I don't know...maybe it's just the whole concept of Kiss Players that gets to me. Those toys would've been better off without the creepy girl accessories IMO.


Well lucky for you they were also released without them!

I know that. I have Alternators Optimus. But IDK...I think the Kiss Players idea would have been best left unexplored.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Optimutt » Mon Feb 14, 2011 10:32 pm

Motto: "If it's not fun and you can't win, it's not worth doing."
OptiMagnus10 wrote:
Mykltron wrote:
OptiMagnus10 wrote:I don't know...maybe it's just the whole concept of Kiss Players that gets to me. Those toys would've been better off without the creepy girl accessories IMO.


Well lucky for you they were also released without them!

I know that. I have Alternators Optimus. But IDK...I think the Kiss Players idea would have been best left unexplored.


Creepy tentacle-tongue Megatron strongly disagreed with that sentiment. At least he did in the Manga.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby 3.8TransAM » Mon Feb 14, 2011 10:36 pm

Diem, I love u man :lol:

These posts are crack me up funny and informative all in one
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Diem » Mon Feb 14, 2011 11:24 pm

Thanks for the compliments guys! #9 will most likely be going up tomorrow night.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Diem » Tue Feb 15, 2011 11:03 pm

#9 Reflector

Who?

Way back in 1984, in accordance with the ancient and sacred law that baddies don't sell as well as goodies, the noble Autobots were somehow having difficulty stopping the Decepticons despite the fact that they outnumbered them roughly eleven squillion to one. After leaving Shockwave behind to keep Cybertron scrubbed and well aired the Decepticon assault force consisted of only 10 members.

Image
"But Mr Shue, unless we get two more members we're not going to go to regionals!"

The odd solution posed by Sunbow was to introduce Reflector, a toy who was generally released in Japan but wouldn't be released in the US until 1986, and even then as a mail-away toy only. Thankfully due to his amazing ability to be 12 guys at once he bolstered the Decepticon forces. Or did he?

So what's so weird about it anyway?

It's difficult to find a part of Reflector that isn't weird.

Image
"So three guys walk into a camera..."

There's the part where all his robots talk and act simultaneously like triplets in a low budget thriller movie. There's the part where in the cartoon all the robots look identical except for their tummy circle. But most importantly in a universe where one robot can become a jet, an aircraft carrier or a city-sized dinosaur it takes three guys to become one camera. The first combiner in the Transformers line was this.



And that's what he does in the show. He's a glorified telescope, except less convenient since you have to wait for his picture to print, then after 12 times you have to buy expensive new polaroid blanks and then you run the risk of people thinking you're a hipster for using a polaroid and then you'll never get around to defeating the Autobots on your fixed gear bicycle.

Also lest we forget if Transformers: The Movie is to be believed Cybertronians have mad long distance skillz just by flipping down their visors. Either that was invented between 1984 and the far flung distant future of 2005 or Thundercracker is humouring Reflector.

Image
Aw, it's almost like they're real Transformers.

The sad part being that other awesome mail-away figures such as the Omnibots got about as much screen time as quality programming on Lifetime.

#9: Honourable Weirdness

Image
"I think he's attempting re-entry."

The sadly short-lived Micromaster Combiner was a brave attempt to combine the popularity of Micromasters with that of Connectables (Micromasters being a combination of Transformers and Micro Machines and Transformers being a combination of my bank account and eBay). Such a fun idea never lasted beyond 12 pairs of robots but it did allow you to create space cherry pickers, hover rocket-launchers and best of all the epic back-end-of-a-dump-truck-attached-to-the-back-end-of-a-crane.

Anyway, that's it for this time. Next time we'll carry on keeping it surreal.

Tell my tale to those who ask. Tell it truly, the ill deeds along with the good, and let me be judged accordingly. The rest... is eight more weird toys.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Optimutt » Tue Feb 15, 2011 11:45 pm

Motto: "If it's not fun and you can't win, it's not worth doing."
[quote="Optimum Supreme"]
Image

quote]

This picture of Opti-pee Magnus is awesome! And not just for the rare Sunstreaker and two veriants of Mirage.

Back on thread: Yup. Reflector is a combining pile of diode-blowing-dimwittery. But he does make a fun toy.

Which then makes me ask where the Street Speed Minicon team will go in this list: a skateboard, a bicycle, and a scooter. While I give HUGE props (as they're probably one of my 3 favorite Mini-con molds) to the idea of them as toys, as real, functional things? I can imagine they'd roll into battle with the hopes of making the 'cons laugh themselves to oblivion.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Diem » Wed Feb 16, 2011 12:19 am

Optimutt wrote:Which then makes me ask where the Street Speed Minicon team will go in this list: a skateboard, a bicycle, and a scooter. While I give HUGE props (as they're probably one of my 3 favorite Mini-con molds) to the idea of them as toys, as real, functional things? I can imagine they'd roll into battle with the hopes of making the 'cons laugh themselves to oblivion.
It makes a lot more sense when you remember that Minicons were refugees rather than warriors. It's no surprise that they'd choose small, nimble inconspicuous forms.
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Re: 10 of the Weirdest Transformers Toys of All Time

Postby Shadowstream » Wed Feb 16, 2011 1:03 am

Weapon: No Weapon
Diem wrote:
Optimutt wrote:Which then makes me ask where the Street Speed Minicon team will go in this list: a skateboard, a bicycle, and a scooter. While I give HUGE props (as they're probably one of my 3 favorite Mini-con molds) to the idea of them as toys, as real, functional things? I can imagine they'd roll into battle with the hopes of making the 'cons laugh themselves to oblivion.
It makes a lot more sense when you remember that Minicons were refugees rather than warriors. It's no surprise that they'd choose small, nimble inconspicuous forms.

Indeed. They're small Transformers that were about the same height as the average young human, therefore it makes more sense for them to take on alt-modes more fitting with human sizes. Expecially when you consider images like this:
Image
Tiny car, or giant kid? It's awkward no matter how you look at it.
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