The Energon Pub

News Credits: 33 · Thu May 20, 2010 7:49 pm

I'm wondering - what do you class as "Successful"? I used to class myself as a successful person - I lived my life as I wanted to and drifted on the breeze. I felt that the things that had hurt me and ruined me in the past were gone. I was wrong and they were always there and I was ignoring them, rather than dealing with them - now the problems of my past have risen back up, and the scars are just as intense as they ever were. It's made me re-evaluate my life in a way I never had before and I don't like what I'm looking at now.

For me "Success" has become destroying what I am now. Maybe that too is running - I don't know. Success for me now is coming to terms with things and coping with the way my life was controlled by personal demons. It has ceased to be simply getting a good job and having a family - they're unimportant now. I certainly don't believe I'll be having the latter of the two in the near to mid future.

For you, what do you consider "Success" personally? Is it a series of goals to be achieved or an ideal vision of yourself?

Forgive this thread, but posting a slice of morbid moaning, but I found the idea of conversing about the ideas of success interesting.

Fri May 21, 2010 5:22 am

First-don't feel bad about posting serious topics. Unless it was in the toys forum or the video games forum.........or......

sorry-jk.

I don't define success on the basis of money or status, although I am doing well. I base success on the fact that I have a very good relationship with my GF, and we have a nice place to live, and we have a good life. My friends are freaking awesome, and my family is pretty cool as well. My girl and I have everything we want, and the means to do what we want and go travel. We have a good life.

On a more spiritual level, both of us live in such a way that we just take every day for what it is. we both live a simple life and don't get caught up in the trappings that some people get involved with. We both believe in the importance of being the type of people we want to be, and don't settle for what other people think we should be. we try our best to improve ourselves as people every single day and learn from our mistakes in all aspects of life. Noone is perfect, but we try to be the best people that we can be.

Not sure if that is what you are looking for as far as an answer. Happiness is the real meter for success. Figuring out what truly makes you happy on the inside is the most important piece of the puzzle. That is something that is harder for some folks than others, but eventually people figure it out. You have to keep looking and then when you find it, make sure to live by it.

Also, be silly ALL the time. That is a must for everyone.

News Credits: 226 · Fri May 21, 2010 5:35 am

I'm happy. 'nuff said.

Fri May 21, 2010 8:45 am

Depends. I guess in some areas, I'm successful. In some areas, nope.

I'm happy, have a wife, one kid and one on the way, and I've got a job that helps support all of them, so I'm successful. On the other hand, I've still got goals, so in parts of my life, my success is a work in progress.

Success is never one of those definitions everyone is going to agree on. Whatever. Someone's success can only be judged by him- or herself; anyone else telling you if you're successful or not is lying.

News Credits: 129 · Fri May 21, 2010 9:22 am

Birds don't care how they fly and oh man, do they ever fly.

News Credits: 9 · Fri May 21, 2010 12:22 pm

success is what you make of it.

on one hand, I've been unemployed for 2 months, and money is tight. That sucks but I don't feel it makes me unsuccessful, just unfortunate like many others in this economy.

I have a family that cares about me, I'm getting married in the fall to a wonderful girl who constantly amazes me with the amount of unconditional love & support she gives, and I have the trust and backing of about 100 people who put my ass in charge of a 5000+ attendee convention. I don't know if that is success, but it certainly helps me sleep at night.

Fri May 21, 2010 2:03 pm

I used to think I was. But I'm not. In my younger days there was so much that I wanted to do with my life, and now it always seems less and less likely that I would ever get to do any of it. It just gets hard to deal with that "I did x, y, and z for this?" feeling/question every morning. But I'm not successful, at all. Life's just been bad in general, and the best thing I have going for me is my girlfriend who I love more than anything, and I can't shake feelings that things with her are reaching their endgame as well, even though she always says they aren't, and I really do believer her, but deep inside it's like I don't believe myself. If I could say I'm successful about anything, it's that I was able to masquarade through life long enough as a moderate success until my father died so he wouldn't have to see what I've "become".

News Credits: 1452 · Fri May 21, 2010 2:09 pm

Don't worry, be happy.

News Credits: 2 · Fri May 21, 2010 2:17 pm

Amelie wrote:I'm wondering - what do you class as "Successful"? I used to class myself as a successful person - I lived my life as I wanted to and drifted on the breeze. I felt that the things that had hurt me and ruined me in the past were gone. I was wrong and they were always there and I was ignoring them, rather than dealing with them - now the problems of my past have risen back up, and the scars are just as intense as they ever were. It's made me re-evaluate my life in a way I never had before and I don't like what I'm looking at now.

For me "Success" has become destroying what I am now. Maybe that too is running - I don't know. Success for me now is coming to terms with things and coping with the way my life was controlled by personal demons. It has ceased to be simply getting a good job and having a family - they're unimportant now. I certainly don't believe I'll be having the latter of the two in the near to mid future.

For you, what do you consider "Success" personally? Is it a series of goals to be achieved or an ideal vision of yourself?

Forgive this thread, but posting a slice of morbid moaning, but I found the idea of conversing about the ideas of success interesting.

I've had a similar journey in that I was living my life in a way that was in denial of issues that I had. I thought I was beyond or above them. I was wrong and it wasn't until I recognized that fact that I was then able to actually make meaningful progress in my life.

I learned that I am a much happier person with more of a sense of fulfillment when I approach life as a process oriented person rather than a goal oriented person. That is to say, I focus more on the broad period of experiencing something rather than the relatively short period of achievement or even failure. Win or lose, so to speak, I've learned that even if I don't meet a goal, I can certainly still gain immensely from going through a process of realizing an aspiration.

For me, success in the broadest sense is the ability to appreciate every moment of my life, to be aware of and recognize all that I experience. I am always doing my best to not slip into mindset that takes things for granted. I can sincerely smile and feel happy about a day like today where I live where the sky is blue, the sun is shining, and the warmth in the breeze is pleasant. I know it may seem silly to some but after years, I am finally able to resist the urge to quelch an honest and almost child like reaction to what I think is a beautiful day. Now this is a day that isn't necessarily better than any other day but I am able to see that this is a beautiful day nevertheless and appreciate it.

I suppose what I'm really saying is that one way I view success is to be able to be honest with yourself. To not deny what you know to be true.

News Credits: 3 · Fri May 21, 2010 7:48 pm

I've been homeless, and I've been Rich, and everywhere in between. Currenly I'm broke, but pretty happy and in the end the happyness is all that really matters

News Credits: 2 · Sat May 22, 2010 11:45 pm

I really can't say I'm sucessful.

That doesn't mean I'm a bad person, or even a person that has nothing in life. I have a house still paying for it but that ain't so bad...its modest but certainly not a hunk of crap...needs the regular maintaince, it is like 60 years old.

In terms of job wise well...not so good.
I've worked very hard in life, but as for a career well its pretty sad really. I live more or less with some cash in the bank, but it could go quick if I needed a car or something else big.

I guess one would say I live a little better than paycheck to paycheck but not much better.

As for job well I don't really think its my fault my career sucks.

At 13 I got a job deliving papers and was able to by my first car before I could drive. By senior year in highschool I had 3 jobs, I got up in the morning delivered news papers, went to school got out at noon for work release and after 6pm worked retail.
-The news paper...I gave up after I was hired fulltime after graduation.
-The work release which was a Drafting job closed due to the econemy that year.
-The retail job was Bradlees which closed thier doors in 2001 (13 years there)
-After my drafting job closed I worked at a printing company for 6 years until they eliminated the shift I worked on.
-After Bradlees I worked at Kmart until a Walmart opened across the street and a year later that store closed. But I transfered to another store where eventually the went through a 'workforce' reduction layoff.
-After the printing company I worked at another printing company which was sold to another company which closed our branch down.
-I then worked for another printing company who hired me, but then when times got tight let the lowest man on the pole go...me.
-I've recently worked for 6 years at retail call center catalog...which is moving in a few months out of state...
-And I worked for 4 years at Staples after Kmart until they fired me...the reason I asked for time off to care for my mother who was dying...of course they never outright said that, but its a funny coincidence that I apply for the time and they conviently cut back on someone who has a personal problem.

So considering I'll be unemployed shortly (I might add the first time in my life I'll be facing unemployment benifits @ 37 years old) I'd say my 'career' if you want to call it that is a joke.

Family wise...well its a mixed bag.
I am married wish I could say all was well there, but I can't however I guess it works well enough the wife and I have been married for 6 years but together for 16 years.

So that's kind of a wash.

No kids, but we are trying...so I guess that's a fail.

I did take care of my mom up until her passing of cancer last October and am doing the same for my grandmother who is currently 92 and I'm told has maybe a year+ with her cancer. (Even though her two children who are still alive are doing NOTHING to help her.)So I guess I'm a sucess as a son and grandson.

So...am I a sucess...probably not mostly do to circumstance.

But I'm told the important thing is I keep trying. Which I do so I guess I'm a sucess at trying, or maybe at least a sucess on finding out what doesn't suceed.

Sun May 23, 2010 12:11 pm

"Success" means something different to everyone.

For me (since that is all I can speak for), "success" is a sense of personal satisfaction as to the directions you have taken in life. This concept changes and grows as the person does, so it is not one set-standard.

At this point in my life, I consider myself successful. I have my own place, make my own way, got work that is pretty reliable and that pays fair-to-middling, I enjoy life. To me, in that joy is MY success.

Mon Jun 07, 2010 9:46 am

I consider myself to be a successful person. My needs are met or exceeded in all areas I can think of. I have a good family, a place to live, great friends, a great girlfriend, food to eat, a mode of transportation, I can keep myslef entertained, and have a great job.

There are things I still want to do in life, but at the point I am now, I think I am successful.

News Credits: 668 · Mon Jun 07, 2010 12:11 pm

I'm not sure how to label it, but I do have a lot to be thankful for.

I don't have a college degree, or what people would call a "normal" job, but for the most part I'm happy.

I'm blessed and need to be thankful for those blessings.

That's what matters. Success works in financial markets. It should never be a label for one's life.

Take a good look at those so called "successful" people.

- Drugs.
- Alcohol.
- Abusive relationships.
- Scrutinized because of their success.
- Most likely did VILE things to attain their level of success.

None of that seems at all appealing to me.

If you want true success with yourself...take care of what's making you feel bad, realize that you can't change the past but you can change the future, and become the person you wanted to be.

Be a good husband or wife or parent or both (if you have both in your life).

Love with your whole heart.

Once you're blessed with real happiness, hold onto it and help to make it flourish, don't go after the "bigger, better" deal. You'll quickly find out that there isn't one. Or, if for some reason there is a bigger, better deal for you, that the costs might be more than you're willing to pay or should.

Forgive more often, holding grudges hurts you, which can hurt others, and when they finally heal and move on, you've left yourself in a world of hurt and wasted precious time.

Find your happiness, and the rest will fall into place. Until you're happy with yourself, you'll never see the good things in life. Self loathing is the biggest hurdle we all face.

Sun Jun 20, 2010 10:13 pm

I consider myself successful because i`m happy and healthy. Success isn`t about you have more money or a brand new car, it`s about you do what you love and love what you do. :-?

Wed Jun 23, 2010 3:44 pm

I don't feel sucessful. I'm 31 and still buy toys, don't have a job, and have never been kissed.

However if you measure sucess based on peers, then it is very hard to achieve. I try to measure it based on my past circumstances. I no longer live at home, I'm almost done with school and I'm driving the nicest car I've ever had.

So sucess depends on your point of view.

Fri Jun 25, 2010 12:58 am

As others have said, success is different for everyone.

A person on their death bed told me in their drug induced haze that they considered their life a success becasue they had acheived what they wanted, regretted their wrongs, celebrated their victories and considered their purpose. Yet, that person died, alone, at 2 in the morning, in a resthome with not a family member to care. Not even the death cat came to visit them.

Was that success for them? To die alone with a stink load of money in the bank? Perhaps it was. Only they knew.

Its up to each of us to determine what we want to measure our successes and failures by.

Mon Aug 16, 2010 8:21 am

I feel successful at 24 im a Lecturer of film and also work within the media industry. I have a great girlfriend who has similar interests as me. Money is tight and my living situation isnt ideal but still im happy and dont hate waking up in the morning. Which trust me is something i never wish to experience again. so ont he basis of where im at now and what ive been through, yes i would consider myself successful.

News Credits: 23 · Mon Aug 16, 2010 10:41 am

Interesting topic.

I have always been successful. I consider failures as learning tools. It just depends on what my goals are. I currently have two goals, one related to personal matters and one related to being the owner of a business that will earn me enough to own another business which is the real goal.

I feel that God uses personal tragedies to prepare and strengthen. I am fortunate to have a guardian angel that works overtime to keep me from harm. To be successful in anything, trust in the Lord. Sometimes our personal "failures" are there to strengthen someone else. It is NOT "all about me". Oh, and no matter how much knowledge we have, there is someone else who knows more, has more money and leads the perfect love relationship. Judge only yourself because what is right for someone else is probably not right for you.

News Credits: 1 · Mon Aug 16, 2010 11:05 am

I'd like to think of myself as successful. I'm 21, graduated this year after studying computer science, no student loans to pay off(the only loan I have is for my car). I could stand to save a little more money than I do lol. I'm currently working in an entry level job in the IT sector. Going on 4 years of a steady relationship with my GF. Successful or not, I'm happy!

News Credits: 25 · Tue Aug 17, 2010 3:28 pm

Counterpunch wrote:Birds don't care how they fly and oh man, do they ever fly.

Quaintly deep.

For me, I'm married, and unlike most Americans, its a true, deep, loving and committed relationship.

That there makes me successful. In other ways, I have a good job, and good house, and (other than a house and car payment), I'm living debt free. I might not be rich, and I probably never will be, but I'm doing okay, and have a cushion set aside for a rainy day. I consider that a success.

I did, however, vote for Obama. In that, I'm a failure. My wife and I also have yet to conceive after nearly a year of trying, that kinda makes me feel like a failure, but its just a feeling.

Success, like life, is what you make of it. It'll be different for every single person on Earth.

Tue Aug 17, 2010 6:19 pm

I feel like a modest success. My parents probably feel differently. Actually, I am certain they do.

Tue Aug 17, 2010 9:41 pm

Why yes, yes I am a successful person.

News Credits: 20 · Fri Aug 27, 2010 7:43 pm

I don't consider myself successful, but I don't see myself as a failure. I feel as though my life is best described as 'in progress'. I'm working in a field I love, I have my family, and I'll be going to Pastry school next year. I have a lot of be happy about.

But I'm not rich, not financially or emotionally independent of my parents, and I make a pathetic amount of money.

I made an inspirational poster last year that described it best when it said 'Life is just a game of who can run the farthest with their pants down without tripping'.

Sat Aug 28, 2010 11:03 am

Being successful, to me, doesn't mean having money. To quote Chris from Northern Exposure: "Happiness doesn't come from the things you have, it comes from the things you're a part of." Success for me has been learning from my mistakes, having good people around me - wether they are friends or family, and when I've reached the bottom, finding my way back to the top. I've got scars, regrets, said and done things I shouldn't have. I've been through hardships that made me who I am today regardless if they were random events or self-imposed.

I'm grateful to have a job, a loving husband who puts up with my antics, a son who is the light of my life, a home in a city I love to be in, and loads of friends and family who love me just like I am. I've done my best to live by the Golden Rule, to be compassionate, to listen to both sides of the story and still not judge. I won't ever be rich, and that doesn't matter near as much as being a part of something I am proud of. Probably my biggest success - learning to laugh at myself.

I'm a work in progress and I'm not done yet. I'm not perfect and I don't really want to be - that gives me character and keeps me humble.