The Energon Pub

by **Auto Bot** » Sun Apr 06, 2008 4:22 am

Daniel: I'm bored fishing with Hot Rod. Wheelie, give me a rhyme.

by **Newtilator** » Tue May 20, 2008 2:35 pm

Saber Prime wrote:
and now for something completly different...

Astrotrain: Throw out your dead! Throw out your dead!

Megatron: I still function.

Starscream: No you don't. He's dead I sware.

Soundwave: He says he's still alive, you can't toss him out of Astrotrain like that.

Starscream: He'll be dead soon, can I toss him out them?

Megatron: I'm fine, nothing some spam can't fix.

Starscream: Listen to that, he's dilerious, robots don't eat spam. He's done for.

All Decepticons: spam Spam SPam SPAm SPAM, SPAM SPA SPAM...

Astrotrain: Stop that! I don't like spam!

Soundwave: Oh right then toss him out.

and now for something COMPLETLY different.

------

Blackarachnia (Any version): Does this alt mode make my butt look big?

------

Grimlock: Me Grimlock see little dashes between segments of dialog.

Saber Prime: Grimlock, you idiot, I told you not to break the 4th wall!

Grimlock: Me Grimlock like breaking stuff.

Saber Prime: I'm never working with Dinobots again.

a) OMG! I love monty python! Quest for the holy grail is too awesome.
b) In animated, god yes.
c)Damn dinobots. I don't know wether I should let the new animated dinobot in my house, in case he breaks into my fishtank.

Anyway...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=APND1-44Lrg
skip to about 1:35. Not my video, but that bit is a better "What tf's would never say" than I could ever come up with.
Anyway...

Unicron: I'll pass on dessert thanks.
--------------------
Ratchet: Blitzwing, youre finally cleared to leave the mental hospital.
Blitzwing: (:|

---------------------
Dinobot: Run awaaaaaay!
---------------------
Perceptor: l33t! h4xxorz + lolz, I was pwn3d his ass!
Blurr: Eh? Whatshesayingithoughtiwashardtounderstand?
Ultra Magnus: Why me? Why do I get the loons?
Blirr:WhatsthatMagnusyousaysomethingdidyouMagnusdidyou?
Ultra Magnus: Give me more time to translate Blurr! I just need more time!

Forgive my comic misgivings. As Galvatron would say, "This is bad comedy.."

News Credits: 5 · by **Sledge** » Tue May 20, 2008 4:52 pm

Megatron: Thundercracker, Dirge, Thrust: ATTACK!!!

...

Mgatron: Where are they?

Starscream: We left them back at base. They're too expensive to risk in battle.

by **Mr. Kemp** » Tue May 20, 2008 8:41 pm

Optimus (G1), in response to yet another Decepticon attack: "You know what? I have slaggin' had it with these constant raids! No more nice Prime! The Cons are gonna die, and they are gonna die suffering!"

The titanic leader then tilted his head: "But I can't think of how exactly I want to kill'em..." He then headed off to Teletran One to conduct research into the methods of Earth's more famous rulers.

Three hundred years later:

Cybertronian Documentary: "In the year 1985, Optimus Prime, who was still on Earth at this time, launched a devastating campaign against the Decepticons, annihilating more than half of the entire Decepticon force in one skirmish. Prime himself was responsible for at least half of the casualties. His brutal tactics, includind such horrific methods as used by ancient Romanian voivode Vlad Dracula II, have earned him many nicknames, among them "Prime the Impaler", "The Slagmaker", Optimus the Incinerator", and "That Mother-slaggin', Sparkless Spawn of a Glitch."

by **Crossfire56** » Wed May 21, 2008 9:11 am

A little short based on the events of the newest TFA episode, rise of the constructicons.

Mixmaster and Scrapper are sitting on the metal girders of an unfinished building, looking at the street below (as construction workers do). They both see a small red hatchback like Bumblebee's alt-mode go speeding past.

Mix: Woah-ho-ho, look at the tailpipes on that!
Scrap: Aww, man, I wanna make her mine!
(They both transform and land with a crash on the road, then race off after the red car)
Scrap: C'mon, sweet baby, slow down, I can't see those cute little tail-lights of yours!
(The red car suddenly transforms into an animated version of Cliffjumper, who slides to a halt as the constructicons do.)
CJ:What did you say about my tail-lights?!
Scrap: *transforms* Uh, nothin'...*blushes*
Mix: *transforms* Hahaahahaha! Way to go on the 'hot date', Scrap!
CJ: Screw you guys, I'm going to see prime. *transforms and speeds off*

Sorry if it's terrible, it just came to my mind when I was browsin' the forums and decided to post it up.

by **Newtilator** » Wed May 21, 2008 11:14 am

Crossfire56 wrote:A little short based on the events of the newest TFA episode, rise of the constructicons.

Mixmaster and Scrapper are sitting on the metal girders of an unfinished building, looking at the street below (as construction workers do). They both see a small red hatchback like Bumblebee's alt-mode go speeding past.

Mix: Woah-ho-ho, look at the tailpipes on that!
Scrap: Aww, man, I wanna make her mine!
(They both transform and land with a crash on the road, then race off after the red car)
Scrap: C'mon, sweet baby, slow down, I can't see those cute little tail-lights of yours!
(The red car suddenly transforms into an animated version of Cliffjumper, who slides to a halt as the constructicons do.)
CJ:What did you say about my tail-lights?!
Scrap: *transforms* Uh, nothin'...*blushes*
Mix: *transforms* Hahaahahaha! Way to go on the 'hot date', Scrap!
CJ: Screw you guys, I'm going to see prime. *transforms and speeds off*

Sorry if it's terrible, it just came to my mind when I was browsin' the forums and decided to post it up.

No, i think its good.
Way better than my rubbish tripe. :sad:

by **Siren Prime** » Wed May 21, 2008 5:25 pm

Ironhide: I feel pretty!! Oh, so pretty!! I feel pretty, and witty, and gay!!

I'm so sorry!! I couldn't resist!! :lol:

by **lGRIMLOCKl** » Wed May 21, 2008 5:44 pm

grimlock:me bozo

by **lGRIMLOCKl** » Wed May 21, 2008 5:47 pm

any of the dinobots:me vegitarean [size=50]i cant spell worth crap[/size]

by **Newtilator** » Thu May 22, 2008 1:37 am

GRIMLOCK_l wrote:any of the dinobots:me vegitarean [size=50]i cant spell worth crap[/size]

Don't worry, at least ur true to your namesake

Just kidding.

Optimus: Screw this! What if i dont want to be a red truck? I'm gonna be a... err.. a green helicopter! Yeah! that'll teach you..

News Credits: 2 · by **munkimus prime** » Thu May 22, 2008 1:40 pm

Megatron - Blitzwing bring me the allspark fragment.
Blitzwing- Yah meine fuhrer.

I am wreck gar i'm only good for one thing !!!DANCING!!!.

by **lGRIMLOCKl** » Fri May 23, 2008 5:52 pm

WRECKGAR-hey guys instead of watching tv lets read a book<--add snort here

by **Crossfire56** » Fri May 30, 2008 6:21 am

Alright, here's a little scene I've had in my mind for some weeks now...Brawl and Bonecrusher act out a part from one of my favourite Spongebob Squarepants episodes! (with a few modifications of course)

(Bonecrusher and Brawl are coming down the highway to Mission City in robot mode, a police roadblock is laid out for them.)
BC: Ugly 'bot, coming through!
(two police cars get sent flying to opposite sides)
Brawl: People respect self-esteem. *walks on through the gap*
BC: *taps on Barricade's shoulder* Excuse me sir, I hope my terrible ugliness won't be a distraction to you.
Barricade: Not at all, boy. *sniffs something and runs* Arrgh!
(Scene cut to Bonecrusher crouching against a freeway overpass, sniffling)
Brawl: Bonecrusher? BC? What's wrong?
BC: I..I can't do it, Brawl! *turns around, looking depressed* I've tried, and I've tried, but I'm not always as confident as I look..
Brawl: *growls and drags BC out into the middle of the freeway, holding him up* What is wrong with you people, afraid to look ugliness in the face?! Well, LOOK AT IT! It's ugly, isn't it?! (People start running from their cars, screaming) LOOK AT IT! I want all of you to look at it! (the whole highway is deserted now, except for a grid of cars, one of which is a black and white Corvette that transforms into Crossfire)
CF: Holy...I park up for a minute and everybody leaves? *looks to Bonecrusher and Brawl* What did you guys do this time?
BC: I can't help it...I'm just ugly.

CF: *walks over* Hey, I've seen worse *coughs and splutters* Ugh, man, you smell like you transformed with a ton of dead human bodies inside you!
BC: Well, now that you mention it...I did have a few guys get into my cabin earlier...But I thought they jumped out!
CF: That proves it, then, you're not ugly, you just STINK!

Mamma mia, that was long..Still, it's better to post it then have it fade to nothing in my mind.

by **Lockdown72** » Fri May 30, 2008 12:40 pm

munkimus prime wrote:Megatron - Blitzwing bring me the allspark fragment.
Blitzwing- Yah meine fuhrer.

Oh my god that is briliant! My turn:

Sari: SCREW YOU POWELL!

Animated Prowl: *while dancing* Everybody was Kung-fu fighting...

Sentinel Prime: Y'know, maybe I should be nicer to everyone and admit to Ultra Magnus that the whole Elita-1 Incident was my idea.

Animated Starscream: Maybe I should look into getting that chin removal surgery after all...

Lugnut: I Hate Megatron! He could kiss my exhaust pipe for all I care! What's so great about him, anyway?

Animated Blitwing: Maybe I should see a psyciotrist...

Octane: Hello, is this the U.N.? Yes, I'd like to donate enough fuel to power Earth for the next 5 million years...no, I don't want to be paid, I just like helping people for no personal gain whatsoever.

G1 Astrotrain: No! I want to transport you guys! You know I dont like sowing confusion, either!

by **Optimus Prime 1996** » Fri May 30, 2008 3:04 pm

Lol,that was funny.XD

Unicron:I am the Death star!
Megatron:The what?!
Unicron:*Cough*Wrong movie..*Cough*

by **Lockdown72** » Fri May 30, 2008 4:25 pm

Optimus Prime 1996 wrote:Lol,that was funny.XD

Unicron:I am the Death star!
Megatron:The what?!
Unicron:*Cough*Wrong movie..*Cough*

On that note:

Galvatron: Hot Rod, you do not yet realize your importance. You have only begun to discover your power. Join me, and I will complete your training. With our combined strength, we can end this destructive conflict and bring order to Cybertron.
HR: I'll never join you!
Galvatron: If you only knew the power of the Dark Side. Optimus never told you what happened to your father.
HR: He told me enough! He told me *you* killed him!
Galvatron: No. *I* am your father.
HR: No. No. That's not true. That's impossible!
Galvatron: Search your programing, you *know* it to be true!
HR: [anguished] No! No! Wait a sec, you CAN'T be my father, I was built BEFORE you came into being!
Galvatron: Damn it! So much for that plan...

and...

Cyclonus: Lord Galvatron, sir, my armada has completed their scan of the area and found nothing. If the Autobots went into light-speed, it'll be on the other side of the galaxy by now.
Galvatron: Alert all commands. Calculate every possible destination along their last known trajectory.
Cyclonus: Yes, my Lord. We'll find them.
Galvy: Don't fail me again, Cyclonus, or I'll feed you and your "armada" to the Sharkticons.