I think I need to confess something...
When I am nervous, when I feel threatened, when I feel stress, I put up a shell around me and deal with the world in very acidic responses. Sometimes they're jokes, sometimes little jabs and barbs that aren't really meant to be, but it’s my way of telling you I may feel hurt by something, but it’s actually a little thing that can be moved beyond quite easily.
Is it effective? Not always. And I do try to handle this other ways, but I’m not very good at that. Bludgeon being listed as available even though I had been approved for him 4 months prior kind of was a stressy thing.
I feel like I upset Smokey on Friday, which wasn't my intention. I did PM him and apologize because it wasn't my intention. I’m sorry, I know I said I wouldn't speak of it publicly but stuff happened over the weekend that I didn't expect. *looks to Emperor Phaze*
The comment about Percy was one of those barbs. This is mostly because I swear, even though time stamps prove me wrong, it happened in a chronologically different order (we’re blaming time stamp pixies here, they changed things).
For me it was a way to put an end to a
grumble (on the mad scale, grumble is the lowest and most easily put aside), it may not have been for Smokey. It ended up I rattled some cages, I guess it can be said intentionally… but I’m used to cages be rattled in a benign way… and not everyone feels that way. So I decided it needed a public apology too.
I misstep a lot around here, I get that. I guess it’s the old story of text based mediums. With the Emperor around you're likely to see more of me as well (mostly because when I had Bludgeon, i could move so fast I was in danger of getting too far ahead, so since between some life things and all that, I made point to slow down with Bludgeon’s crew) so I really want to make sure every one understands that I didn't mean to offend, seriously didn’t, I'd use swear words if that were the case