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A very pretty, CG dinosaur pops up on screen, makes a dinosaur-like gurgle, and then disappears. Because Dinobots? Don't over think it. And now we're in the present-day Texas. Mark Wahlberg, who is playing the character Cade Yeager (now THAT'S a name) rolls into his Texas farm house with a beat-up semi truck in tow. The semi is clearly the dead carcass of Optimus Prime, but they don't know that yet. Cade is greeted by his daughter Tessa (Nicola Peltz) and his partner Lucas (T.J. Miller). Commence comical banter. You see, Cade is a protective dad and is frustrated with Tessa's very short (exceedingly short) shorts. Don't worry, you get a great look at the tiny teen's shorts because a camera is placed on the ground behind her looking up at Cade's dismayed face. […]
Everyone is mad because Cade spent his last 100 bucks on this beat-up old truck. But that's OK because he is an inventor and "all great inventors something something...your mother would be very proud of you." […]
I will openly admit that the humor in this movie is good. The beats are hilarious and watching Mark Wahlberg act like a loving dad worried about his daughter's legs is basically the Shakespeare of action movies and it never gets old. He even tells a laundry joke about her rapidly shrinking shorts, "cold water and air dry." It made my heart melt. Also, Cade protests that he isn't totally worthless as a father because he taught his daughter how to *insert car activity here* and how to "write a program," both of which we are sure will not become a pivotal plot point in the future ("It's a UNIX System! I know this!").
Moving on, Cade goes into his shop and tells the beat-up old car that it's "Judgement Day," and basically wakes up Optimus. Cue the Federal Agents in sick long, black trench coats with sunglasses and bad attitudes. They are being remotely ordered by Kelsey Grammer who hates Transformers. Hates them!
The Feds want Optimus Prime, but Cade isn't budging. Grammer says "use the girl," and of course, they throw her right over her little red painted wagon and hold a gun to her head—which really pisses off Optimus Prime. The Transformer bursts through the barn (which explodes) and starts fighting. The fight just gets completely out of control and then Tessa's BOYFRIEND shows up in a smart car with racing stickers and literally slow motion punches an agent in the face with the tire on his car. The agent slow motion spits. It is amazing.
Here's where things get interesting. The government agents pull out their very OWN Transformer, Galvatron. Back at the base there's a younger agent who appears to be piloting Galvatron via joystick. Galvatron is their puppet! Optimus and the piloted Transformer spar, and Optimus is losing. BUT THEN a giant […] spaceship comes out of the sky.
Enter Lockdown, the Transformer whose face turns into a GIANT GUN, and he just starts blasting Optimus. Cade gets separated from his daughter and she and Optimus are caught in a robot net, which lifts them into the spaceship. Cade jumps onto the net and tries to hold on, but falls to the ground. In his sheer frustration, Cade slow-motion screams and PUNCHES THE GROUND.
The rest are all hyper cuts from the rest of the movie. Obviously, Cade has to go get his daughter and is reluctantly teamed up with her boyfriend, who doesn't have his respect AT ALL. The scenes jump across the globe. There is a pretty amazing chase scene between Cade and the lead FBI meany who is happens to be the Man in Black from Lost. They are scaling the side of (what appears to be) a Chinese apartment building and the FBI agent is just kicking air conditioning units free, toppling them onto Cade. But the biggest takeaway wasn't all the American flags, the explosions, or even the Transformers. This particular chunk of footage focused mainly on the human story and the humor, and it really succeeds at humor. Stanley Tucci has a great moment where he flips out because he's ordered to hide inside a glass box; he's clearly going to be a ringer in this flick. Also, T.J. Miller has a few great scenes. But the best, the absolute best was when Cade careens a spaceship into a Bug Light truck and on top of some dude's car, destroying it. The man gets out and demands to see Cade's insurance, to which Cade responds, "Insurance? This is a spaceship!" He then slams open an aluminum can of Bud Light, drinks it, throws it at the car and yells, "Sweetie, get me my alien gun."
Megatron Wolf wrote:humans are the center of the movie and theres to much banter and lame seen it before humor, didnt see that coming a mile away not at all
Va'al wrote:Deadput wrote:Actually I don't know my mother's name is Valerie so is Va'al actually my mother?
Yes. Now go to your room and don't play with yourself.
mirageandjazz1197 wrote:Megatron Wolf wrote:humans are the center of the movie and theres to much banter and lame seen it before humor, didnt see that coming a mile away not at all
Oh shut up people who actually like the movies and even those that don't are probably sick and annoyed to see people giving a massive dump of negativity.
There is just no pleasing people but just let some people enjoy reading the news without a bunch of whining going on.
Rodimus Prime wrote:You can't make me disappear. I am not feet.
Shadowman wrote:This is Sabrblade we're talking about. His ability to store trivial information about TV shows is downright superhuman.
Caelus wrote:My wife pointed out something interesting about the prehistoric Predacons. I said that everyone was complaining because transforming for them mostly consisted of them just standing up-right. She essentially said, 'So? That's what our ancestors did.'
That_Guy wrote:Reel Steel?
But that would take away precious screentime from Mr. Wahlberg, dear boy, and we most certainly can't have that, oh no hohohoho.SlyTF1 wrote:The focus on humans worries me. Hopefully, the rest of the movie has to do with Optimus aboard Lockdown's ship and Galvatron regaining control over himself.
Shadowman wrote:This is Sabrblade we're talking about. His ability to store trivial information about TV shows is downright superhuman.
Caelus wrote:My wife pointed out something interesting about the prehistoric Predacons. I said that everyone was complaining because transforming for them mostly consisted of them just standing up-right. She essentially said, 'So? That's what our ancestors did.'
Except that movie has non-human characters with personality and sense of fun and campy enjoyment. The new TMNT trailer has only a few seconds of the Turtles, yet those few seconds gave the Turtles more personality and character than three 2+ hour long films combined gave to the Autobots and Decepticons.T-Macksimus wrote:If you truly want something to bitch about, try being a Ninja Turtle fan and finding out Megan Fox is playing April O'Neil in the new live action TMNT movie. That little tidbit of news f'd my entire day up.
Shadowman wrote:This is Sabrblade we're talking about. His ability to store trivial information about TV shows is downright superhuman.
Caelus wrote:My wife pointed out something interesting about the prehistoric Predacons. I said that everyone was complaining because transforming for them mostly consisted of them just standing up-right. She essentially said, 'So? That's what our ancestors did.'
Ravage XK wrote:That_Guy wrote:Reel Steel?
A sports fishing movie?
Cyber Bishop wrote:mirageandjazz1197 wrote:Megatron Wolf wrote:humans are the center of the movie and theres to much banter and lame seen it before humor, didnt see that coming a mile away not at all
Oh shut up people who actually like the movies and even those that don't are probably sick and annoyed to see people giving a massive dump of negativity.
There is just no pleasing people but just let some people enjoy reading the news without a bunch of whining going on.
He is entitled to his opinion as you are to yours.
I don't care either way to be honest after reading the partial synopsis I am not very hyped anymore about the movie.. I was when I saw the trailer with Grimlock but the more I read... Meh.
Oh and Captain America TWS annd Guardians of the Galaxy should be able to blow TF out of the water as far as money is concerned this year.
Time will tell and when this movie comes out I will check it out and formulate my own opinion (which we are entitled to) then.
Va'al wrote:Deadput wrote:Actually I don't know my mother's name is Valerie so is Va'al actually my mother?
Yes. Now go to your room and don't play with yourself.
You are kidding right? After three movies and trailer that leaves no hope, you now start to think about something completly obvious to anyone?SlyTF1 wrote:The focus on humans worries me.
Rather not. What is Bayformers Movie where there is no main humen character heroic last stand to save the day, so Prime could again take all the credit?Hopefully, the rest of the movie has to do with Optimus aboard Lockdown's ship and Galvatron regaining control over himself.
That_Guy wrote:Ravage XK wrote:That_Guy wrote:Reel Steel?
A sports fishing movie?
Yuh I meant Real Steel, go me.
mirageandjazz1197 wrote:I should just shoot myself in the head so i don't have to deal with this crap everyday.
TurboMMaster wrote:You are kidding right? After three movies and trailer that leaves no hope, you now start to think about something completly obvious to anyone?SlyTF1 wrote:The focus on humans worries me.
That's... pretty sad, actually.SlyTF1 wrote:The trailer was awesome and was the most exciting thing to ever happen to me in my life.
Shadowman wrote:This is Sabrblade we're talking about. His ability to store trivial information about TV shows is downright superhuman.
Caelus wrote:My wife pointed out something interesting about the prehistoric Predacons. I said that everyone was complaining because transforming for them mostly consisted of them just standing up-right. She essentially said, 'So? That's what our ancestors did.'
Sabrblade wrote:That's... pretty sad, actually.SlyTF1 wrote:The trailer was awesome and was the most exciting thing to ever happen to me in my life.
Not that it was this trailer, but that a mere two-and-a-half minute video is the most exciting thing ever for you.
TurboMMaster wrote:You seriously should get a life...
So far, there is no reason to belive this movie could be at least decent. And after ROTF and DOTM it's hard too have any hope.
Transformers: Age of Extinction? They should have call it Transformers: Age of Failure
Va'al wrote:Deadput wrote:Actually I don't know my mother's name is Valerie so is Va'al actually my mother?
Yes. Now go to your room and don't play with yourself.
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