The Ultimate Caption Contest
Inferno holds Red Alert
148 hilarious transmissions have been received from across the galaxy...
trailbreaker says:
Red Alert - “Party at Sunstreaker’s tonight ?”
Inferno - “You know it !!”
BG the Robit says:
Inferno: I'd kill myself for you.
Red Alert: Really? You'd do that?
Inferno: No, not really. I'm just trying to make this scene more dramatic.
Red Alert: I hate you.
psycho_425 says:
Red:Inferno,I just want to say,I...Love.....William Hung singing....
Inferno:Damn it! I should have known!!!
Road Turtle says:
Red Alert, "I wish I could quit you..."
Inferno, "Uh, the joke's over, and you're addicted; let go home."
Judynator says:
Inferno: Oh, Red Alert! I love You!
Red Alert: Me too!
*kiss*
All: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWW!!!
trailbreaker says:
Inferno: "Look mom! My new G1 Reissue of Red Alert came in the mail!!!"
starscream_the_eternal says:
Inferno: "Isn't California the greatest sweetie, I mean there is no fear of being judged."
Red Alert: "I know! Now be a doll and watch my head when we go across the threshold, I don't what to bump it on the door frame. I only bum
Roadshadow says:
Inferno: Aww, look at da wittle Reddy Awert!
Red Alert: I AM NOT A ----ING BABY!!!
Dragonoth says:
Red Alert: It was awful! The Decepticons were attacking Autobot city, and I was gunned down by Constructicons! But I feel much better now that you're here, Inferno.
Inferno: It's alright, little buddy. I was on a moon base that was eaten by a m
Fireblader says:
Inferno: lift 1,2,3 down 1,2,3. 2 more to go!
Red Alert: How long are you going to keep up this exercise regime for, Inferno?
Inferno: til the end of the season.
Red Alert: Damn.
Unknown says:
Red Alert:I'm sorry for ever doubting you.
Inferno:I told you it was big.
Red Alert:Hold me closer you BIG BOT!
archangel_tears says:
Red Alert: last night was the greatest I have had in a long time. the crack, acid, pot, meth, and angel dust was just what the doc order.
Inferno: yeah, tell me about it. I just don't get why my but hurt so bad this morning.
Red Alert: I'm not
bringo says:
You are such a baby, having me to carry your ass everywhere. Yeah, but you love it.
shockwave_inoz says:
Inferno: "Well, HELLO there little guy..." *winks*
Red Alert: "And HELLO to you, you big handsome chunk of..."
Optimus Prime: "Oh, SCRAP!! No wonder we keep losing to the Decepticons. Will you two please FOCUS??!!"
Red Ale
juggaloG says:
RA: Thanks for the trip to Disneyland, daddy!
I: You're welcome, son! Tomorrow we go to SIX FLAGS!
Thanatos Prime says:
RA: Never let me go!
I: Do not worry, we were meant to be together!
Optimus: WILL YOU TWO KNOCK IT OFF!!!
Dragonoth says:
Rule by fear is not as good as rule by trust. That is why the Autobots always won, until the Decepticons finally got their timing right and launched a surprise assault just when the Autobots were doing this, in 2005.
NOBODY LOVES WHEELIE says:
Bed time for Red Alert.
Red Alert,"Read me Brair Rabbit again?"
Inferno,"Nope it's Silence of the Lambs for you buddy."
A'Arab Zaraq says:
"What day is it today?"
"Wednesday"
"Is G.A.Y. still on at the Astoria London?"
"I dunno, let's take a look..."
"Gender Bender Bots... Transform and Roll Out!"
A'Arab Zaraq says:
The insecticon Hypno-Gas was to have devastating effects on Inferno's Relationship with his respective female partner back on Cybertron...
*ahem*
Seibertron
SeekerInAFakeMoustache says:
Inferno regretted smothering Red Alert with a pillow and immediately made plans to drive them both into the lake.
Ransom says:
Inferno: Red Alert? Are you alright?
Red Alert: Of course!
Inferno: Really? I mean, you're SMILING.
Red Alert: What's wrong with that?
Inferno: Oh, nothin' -- just've never seen you relaxed before. You're always uptigh
Thrasher says:
Inferno: I love your smile.
Red Alert: I love you hose.
Inferno: You know, Tracks told me the same thing last night.
Tracks (Off camera): Yeah, he really knows how to work that thing!
Red Alert (Thinking):And they wonder why I have issues. . .
snavej says:
Inferno: [smiles]
Red Alert: [smiles]
Inferno: [smiles wider]
Red Alert: [grins]
Inferno: [makes kissy face]
Red Alert: [licks lips slowly]
Inferno: [growls seductively]
Red Alert: [raises eyebrows]
Laserbeak (flying above): For Bl
snavej says:
Red Alert: So, what music does Grimlock like? Dinosaur Jr.? T.Rex? The Monster Mash?
Inferno: No, Queen! I've heard him singing along to 'Bicycle' at 165 decibels!
snavej says:
Inferno: Warpath is standing dangerously close to that cliff. One stray blast from my water cannon could send him over the edge!
Red Alert: You'll cure his scraplet infection at the same time!
snavej says:
Red Alert: I bet you fifty energon cubes that the next caption competition picture will be a Junkion kissing Grimlock in Transformers: The Movie.
Inferno: The way things are going, that's a bet worth taking. You're on!
Red Alert: 'Me
snavej says:
Inferno: This music has an irresistable influence on me. I can't stop this feeling inside. Who's the singer?
Red Alert: The late Barry White.
Inferno: Oh, scrap! I must have you now! Assume the position!
Red Alert: You're so ma
snavej says:
Red Alert: Scorponok said that we had to smooch for at least five minutes, or else he'd annihilate that small village over there.
Inferno: Smooching to save lives; strange but great!
Red Alert: You know, Scorponok will probably destroy the vill
snavej says:
Inferno: Let's go round to little Jimmy's place and watch 'Fireman Sam'.
Red Alert: Good idea. I'm sick of all this fighting.
Dclone Soundwave says:
You should have left me there to die, Inferno.
What kind of talk is that?! I saved you because you're my best friend!(Low whisper) Now don't forget our little deal, tonight, 9 o' clock, my quarters, got it?
Yes, but no funny bussiness
ninjabot says:
Inferno: Tell me where you hid that energon, or I'll break you in half, and wipe that stupid grin off your face module.
Red Alert: Yeah right, you aint that crazy. You know Prime will beat the brakes off you for that!!
Dark Monkelus says:
red alert: you know, my legs may be paralysed but I still love you.
galvanostril says:
red alert: hehehehe, look at all the gay jokes those brainless n00bs keep making...
injerno: yeah, I'm glad it's simply that your lower half was paralyzed by starscream's null ray, lets smile about these bad gay jokes!
(meanwhile in the f
galvanostril says:
inferno: yay! I finally bought the life sized red alert action figue, but that goofy grin...
kitbashing time!
shockwave_inoz says:
Red Alert: "Where are you taking me?"
Inferno: "Wouldn't you like to know...heh, heh."
Red Alert: *thinking* "Hm, this reminds me of those movies Buster was showing me the other day where the they... Uh, oh."
Inferno:
Ransom says:
Red Alert: Thank you for saving me, Inferno, but you should have let me die; I enjoy pain.
Inferno: Ok. *drops RA over the cliff*
Producer: What the-- Alright who messed with the script?!
Inferno and the other Autobots: Heeheehee.
Ransom says:
Prime: (offscreen) Ok, now, you've just saved Red Alert from a horrible death, so smile. You too, Red Alert.
Red Alert: *smiles*
Inferno: ...
Prime: (offscreen) Come on, Inferno.
Inferno: I can't, Prime! He was about to die a horribl
Ransom says:
What you know: Red Alert and Inferno smiling about Inferno's joke.
What you DON'T know: Inferno wasn't joking. >:)
Ransom says:
Red Alert: Inferno, your processor must be underclocked! Why by Primus do you keep setting the alarm off? What if Decepticons had actually been at the base? And frightening me into your arms? My dignity will never recover!
Inferno: I know MY reputation
snavej says:
Inferno and Red Alert hypnotise each other and stand motionless for thirteen days until Ratchet cures them with a big metal club.
Binaltech Bombshell says:
Inferno: Once I carry you over the threshold, our new life together will begin!
Red Alert: Oh, darling, I'm the happiest girl in the world!
Prime(off screen): I just puked inside my facemask...
snavej says:
At the smiling competition, Red Alert collapses and Inferno takes the opportunity to throw him out of the arena. Meanwhile, Grimlock, Optimus Prime, Shockwave and many others complain bitterly about their disqualifications. Gears and Huffer find that th
snavej says:
Red Alert: What's in your cab today, Inferno? Hookers? Drugs? Sleeping firefighters? Sleeping firefighting hookers on drugs?
Inferno: Lucky guess. You know me too well.
Hooker #1: Keep it down.
Hooker #2: We need our beauty sleep.
Ho
snavej says:
Inferno: What's that red stuff oozing out of your back? Have you been drinking that illegal red diesel? It's bad for you!
Red Alert: No, I had a passenger inside me but then I forgot about it and transformed. It was crushed between my engi
snavej says:
Optimus Prime: At this point, I realised that my warriors were hopelessly flawed - corrupted by smart asses. I knew that I had to absorb their sparks back into the Matrix and begin again. I brought forth dozens of new sparks for their empty bodies. All
Road Turtle says:
Red Alert, "Now who's my great big fireman?"
Inferno, "...and Who's my little Fire Chief?"
its_crawford says:
Red Alert: thanks for pulling me out of that all-exhaust pipe 10 bot orgy inferno!
Inferno: yours perfect ruby star fruit belongs to me!
Mok says:
Transformers the Movie casting update:
Inferno will be played by Kevin Cosner
Red alert by Whitney Houston
Kevinus Prime says:
"...and the the three bears ate Goldilocks, and lived happily ever after."
"Tell it again, Unca Inferno!"
Kevinus Prime says:
"Is that a missle on your shoulder, or are you just happy to see me?"
terrordive2020 says:
Red Alert: Wait I still function
Inferno: Wanna bet
Red Alert: Infernoooooooooooooooooo
snavej says:
Inferno: You know, Red Alert, with your particular deco style, you could be big in Japan; maybe do one of those 'Transforming Car' TV commercials.
Red Alert: Yeah, and while I'm there I can star in a TV show like Gundam!
Inferno: Hasb
snavej says:
Red Alert: I wonder if the writers of the new movie are reading our smart ass comments?
Inferno: They'd better! It's probably the only way we'll have any input to the film!
Red Alert: My ass is smarter than your ass.
Inferno: That
snavej says:
Inferno: ...and it turned out that the whole steelworks was gay.
Red Alert: Just like in the Simpsons!
Inferno: All you need to do to understand Earth is to watch the Simpsons.
Red Alert: If only we'd figured that out in 1984, we could have
prowllooker says:
Red Alert: Inferno you wanna go clubbin w/Jazz?
Inferno: What club are you two going to?
Red Alert: Club Inferno
snavej says:
Inferno: We never got a decent part in the Dreamwave comics. Let's go over to Pat Lee's house, throw his Porsche through the front wall and blow up his dog!
Red Alert: Race you there!
Inferno: No fair!
JazZeke says:
Inferno "Aw shoot, you're not a chick."
Red Alert "Thanks for rescuing me from that dragon anyway."
Inferno "Oh just get down!" *drops Red Alert unceremoniously*
snavej says:
Red Alert: Jazz says that the Autobot/Decepticon conflict is a charade. The real war is between the gay and straight Transformers.
Inferno: Who's going to win?
Red Alert: Probably the gay ones. There are so few fembots that the straights are
snavej says:
Red Alert: I've been going out with Jazz behind your back.
Inferno: Why, you hussy!
Red Alert: He's so darned cosmopolitan, not like you Mr. Boring Firetruck.
Inferno: You can save yourself next time!
snavej says:
Red Alert: Where did Ramjet get that camper van full of pig excrement, anyway?
Inferno: Swindle's Ultimate Weapon Emporium, I think.
Red Alert: Sunstreaker's going to be stinking for weeks!
snavej says:
Inferno: Well, we only just failed to crash Mirage's fancy party but we did steal some nice shoe trees!
Red Alert: I can't feel my legs.
Inferno: I'm feeling them for you, good buddy! Mmmm!
snavej says:
Red Alert: Darling?
Inferno: Yes, darling.
Red Alert: We nearly got our asses handed to us again, didn't we?
Inferno: What about it, darling?
Red Alert: I was thinking, maybe we could change to less visible colouration. Hound is dark gre
snavej says:
Red Alert: COMMUNISTS, COMMUNISTS EVERYWHERE!
Inferno: Don't take your name too literally, now. Relax.
Red Alert: You're right, I feel better already!
Inferno: Good.
Red Alert: MASONS! ROTARIANS! ILLUMINATI! ALIENS! GOVERNMENT C
snavej says:
Red Alert: So, why are you a minister, Inferno?
Inferno: Well, brother Grapple was the smart one and got the tough job of designing all our buildings and stuff. I was the stupid one who was sent to religious school. That's how it goes.
Red Al
snavej says:
Inferno: I baptise thee in the name of Primus, Prime and the Matrix.
Red Alert: Thank you, Reverend Inferno.
Inferno: No longer will Commander Riker, from Star Trek: The Next Genderation, take your name in vain.
Red Alert: Yeah, that unambitious
dabattousai says:
Inferno: Come on Red Alert, I know I can't carry IT for you, but I can carry YOU!!!
(In case none of you remember this quote it was in Lord of the Rings: Return of the King when Sam carried Frodo a bit up Mount Doom.)
DecepticonRedAlert says:
Inferno:this will be are little secret okay red
alert
RA:don't ask don't tell right
Pokejedservo says:
Optimus Prime (offscreen): Spike, I'm beginning to think that this "booze" you speak of is not fit for Autobot consumption. Spike: How can you tell? Optimus Prime: Oh call it a lucky hunch...
snavej says:
Red Alert: Daddy?
Inferno: Yes, I am the Daddy.
Red Alert: I been a bad boy with matches, Daddy.
Inferno: Don't worry son, I put out the fire with my incredibly big hose.
Red Alert: Can me play with big hose?
Inferno: When you're
Zeedust says:
Inferno: "Easy there... Calm down..."
Red Alert: "You can't foool me! You only saved my life so you could kill me!"
Inferno: "How does that even make sense?"
Steeleye says:
Inferno offers Trypticon a treat.
*Arcee from out of shot*
"Remember to keep your palms flat."
Dark_Lord_Prime says:
Inferno: "Red Alert, there's something I need to tell you. I.. uh.. I--"
Red Alert: "Shhh. You had me at 'hello'."
snavej says:
The Autobots came to Earth to show the humans the true meaning of lurve. They also succeeded in keeping some humans awake all night due to the clanking and banging produced by Autobot lurve.
snavej says:
Inferno: As my new wife, you will be expected to prepare energon, wash my armour, clean my quarters, run errands, organise our social lives, look after the Minicons and do bedroom stuff - with enthusiasm!
Red Alert: As a feminist-bot, I'll blow yo
snavej says:
Strange alien homos wear explosive genitals on shoulders - shock (National Enquirer, 27 Nov. 1984) Bible belt outrage, pages 2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 16, etc. Vicar's wife pleads 'Won't somebody think of the children?' -
snavej says:
Red Alert: Did you once crash a large aircraft into anything, Inferno old chum?
Inferno: Why yes I did, me old mucker! It was back in the 1980's. You may remember it from the UK Transformers comic, somewhere between issue 150 and 160 I think. I
snavej says:
Inferno: You and I need to have a serious talk with Slag.
Red Alert: He's behind 95% of all fires in schools, old people's homes and animal sanctuaries!
snavej says:
Red Alert: Listen, me fire chief car, you fire engine, you obey. You take me to body shop spa and feed me energon bubbles until I barf lightning, kapeesh?
Inferno: Sure, boss. Me get speech therapy from Grimlock too!
snavej says:
Inferno: OK, I'm going to put you down and then step away. We'll pretend that this never happened, got it?
Red Alert: Teeheeheehee! OK, big red!
Road Turtle says:
Following Vermont's and Massacuhsettes' socially progressive lead; Seibertron, today, finally legalized Gay Marriage.
JazZeke says:
Inferno: "Dude, you're not Arcee."
Red Alert: Dude, I'm flying! The sky's melting!"
When Optimus discovered Spike had been using Bumblebee to smuggle pot accross the border, he ordered Red & Inferno to burn it all.
Varnus says:
"I Just Died In Your Arms Tonight" is playing the background
Optimus Prime-- "Blaster!"
Blaster-- "Sorry Prime, tryin to spread the love!"
Prime-- "By primus, this is a sad sight."
Acelister says:
Red Alert: "I'm hot for you..."
Inferno: "No, you're a normal temperature..."
Red Alert: "No... I'm hot for you..."
Inferno: "Then you'd better check your temperature guage..."
Red Alert: &q
Acelister says:
Red Alert: "Inferno..."
Inferno: "Yes?"
Red Alert: "What's that black smoke behind you?"
Inferno: "Let me put it this way... Stay away from this human meal called 'Beans on toast'..."
Fussion says:
Red Alert: You make me sooo HOT!
Inferno: Cool it Red Alert! I think Hot Spot is coming over here, don't tell him about that burning sensation.
lakehudson2002 says:
Inferno - I can't wait to carry you through the Ark's Thresh Hold.
Red Alert - It was such a beautiful wedding, Wasn't it. I still can't beleave you got Prime to officiate the Ceremony for us.
Inferno - Yeah I know Now lets get
DaGame666x says:
Inferno: I got ya, I got ya!!!!!
(Red Alert falls)
Inferno: oops!!!! Here let me get u back to base.
Red Alert: Hey Inferno, do me a favor?
Inferno: Yeah Red Alert anything.
Red Alert: don't ever try to catch me again. You Suck!!!!!!!!
Zeedust says:
Red Alert's spark had been extinguished, but from his body, Inferno would fashion a new form, and fight on for the both of them...
Thus is the way of the Universe.
snavej says:
Inferno: OK, this is the last one. Sideswipe, looks like I got to you just in time. You've lost most of your colour! Ultra Magnus will take you to Ratchet right away.
Red Alert: But I'm not Si...
Inferno: Hush now, save your strength.
doowaneeprime says:
Inferno: I LOVE YOU.
Red Alert: NO YOU DON"T MAN, I LOVE YOU.
Inferno: I really love you.
Red Alert: NO MAN, I LOVE YOU
Optimus Prime (out of shot): Just say Thank-you as it is possible for two male robots to share a platonic love for one another
Marv says:
Wait, here's a note..."I am a desperate mother who can't feed her newborn Protoform, please take care of my little Red Alert"...hmmm, well, why not? It's not like you'd ever bother us with false alarms or anything, right litt
Marv says:
Inferno, musing over this picture: "It's a moment you'll never forget. To hold your newbuild son in your arms and see him smile at you for the first time..."
snavej says:
Inferno: Now I'll carry you back to my lair and do unspeakable things to you.
Red Alert: What the heck, why not? We've got so much time on our hands.
Inferno: When I say 'unspeakable', I mean I'm going to remove your voice
snavej says:
Inferno: He ain't heavy, he's my brother!
Red Alert: Brothers in arms. Dire Straits, y'know.
Inferno: Huggin' and a'kissin', dancin' and a'lovin', wearin' next to nothin' 'cause it's
snavej says:
As Transformer after Transformer fell victim to the gay plague, those few who remained engaged in a last-ditch partnership with human car manufacturers to develop a radical solution. Transformers would soon be rebuilt as HETEROTECH warriors, immune to an
snavej says:
Red Alert: 'It's in the blood, it's in the will, it's in the mighty hands of steel, when you're standing your ground!'
Inferno: 'You've got the touch, you've got the power, yeah!' That's OUR song,
snavej says:
Inferno: Another close shave! Let this be a lesson to you, Red Alert - don't blow up a gas station in a residential area, even if it is full of African-Americans dissing you and calling you 'stinkin' robotic honky'.
Red Alert: Actu
snavej says:
Inferno: I'm so happy, I could generate a song. Here goes! 'Well I'm a west coast lover, one bad mother, got a rattlesnake suitcase under my arm.'
Red Alert (joining in): 'Well, I'm a mean machine, I'm drinking gaso
Stormshadow says:
Red alert: Hey inferno you can put me down now.
Inferno: Huh oh yeah sorry was miles away.
Red alert: You're not wrong there; you just carried me several miles, I was wondering when the ride would end. I can walk for my self you know...you do know
snavej says:
Inferno: I know you like celebrity gossip, in a strange kind of way. Courtney Love is having a baby by Steve Coogan!
Red Alert (consults online celebrity database): The same Steve Coogan who does the Alan Partridge comic character?
Inferno: Yup.
Death-Ray Charles says:
Inferno : IT'S A BOY ! YYYAAAYYY
Congratulations Mr. & Mrs. Alert.
snavej says:
Inferno: It's getting hot in here, so take off all your clothes.
Red Alert: I am getting so hot, I'm gonna take my clothes off!
snavej says:
Inferno: Well, you got crippled by a Decepticon sniper, so we'll have to rebuild you as a four-by-four vehicle. You'll have powerlink ports and you'll have to link with Minicons on a regular basis for at least eighteen months.
Red Alert
snavej says:
Inferno: We've all had enough of your paranoid outbursts. Prime's told me to throw you to the...
Red Alert: Sharkticons?
Inferno: No, lesbians!
A lesbian (out of shot): Don't forget the chocolate sauce!
Red Alert: Scrap! Frak!
snavej says:
Inferno: When we get the chance, all the red bots are gonna overthrow the bourgeoisie and form the Union of Soviet Cybertronian Republics.
Red Alert: I love it when you talk dirty.
snavej says:
Inferno: I don't think being a fire chief's car and a Lamborghini Diablo sports car at the same time is a very good way of disguising yourself on Earth.
Red Alert: If you're going to be picky, neither is being a fire truck with two huge
snavej says:
Red Alert: I hate to spoil the moment, but what's that dog doing to your leg?
Inferno: You're so alert, Red Alert! I think he's doing something similar to what the bird just did on your chest.
snavej says:
Inferno: Have you seen my copy of 'Heat' magazine?
Red Alert: You mean the one with all the celebrity pictures and gossip? I cut it up and pasted it all over my room in a frankly disturbing manner.
Inferno: No, the magazine for fire fight
snavej says:
Inferno: ...and so Soundwave picked up Megatron like this and carried him to Astrotrain. Frak knows where they went afterwards.
Red Alert: That was a lovely story. Can we go to bed now?
Inferno: No, I've got a hot date with the Human Torch ou
snavej says:
Repaints in love: white and red slowly merge to form a pink fuzzy ending.
'Grapple me before I sideswipe you!'
'All in a day's work ma'am.'
'Are you a friend of Dorothy too?'
'Sure am. Remind me to
New Omen says:
Here we see secret bonus footage from the soon to be released transformers the movie reconstructed.During casting Inferno and Red Alert try out for the roles of Starscream and Megatron. We see them performing the famous scene where Starscream throws meagt
Wolfguard says:
It`s just a hose Red, nothing more all right? G-zuz, wipe that smirk off your face and quit staring at it - Now!
kennyman says:
Inferno and Red alert: This can be the start of a very, very beautiful relationship.
