The Energon Pub

So some people may have been wondering where the heck I've been (and a large portion of those same people are understandably groaning to see me online again). So uh, here I am. I thought I'd rear my ugly head again and explain myself a bit.

At the risk of sounding like I'm wallowing in self-pity (which I can assure you is not my intent), life has been...difficult recently. For the past several years (at least 5 at this point) my parents have been engaged in a rather messy divorce, not helped by the fact that my dad has been an absolute raging [expletive] about it. Without going into too much detail he's always been an emotionally abusive, gaslighting, narcissistic [distinctly Australian expletive] who's put me and my mother through hell, and now that we've finally put our foot down and told him enough is enough, he's dragging his heels and been holding things up for as long as humanly possible. To make matters even worse, despite the fact the man has 6 bank accounts, earns £90,000 a year and has £13,000 in premium bonds (which it's safe to say we can't even hope to match) he's been trying to screw us out of every penny we have and not pay any upkeep/alimony. He's been difficult and quite frankly unbearable to live with, to the point the stress has given me IBS amongst other things.

He has finally, at long last moved out (though the divorce STILL isn't over and we're going to have to find somewhere new to live), though not before taking half the contents of the house (including THE JAR OF TABLE SALT) and I've finally been feeling well enough to not spontaneously combust at a moment's notice- hence my return.

I'd thus like to apologize for being a grumpy, confrontational and at times downright nasty piece of work in some of my later interactions (I'd especially like to apologize to poor old Va'al and Burn, who had to pick up the pieces from my explosions). I haven't been feeling myself at all and frankly this last year has been excruciating for me, and my poor mother especially. I know that doesn't excuse my behaviour but I feel like I should at least explain myself.

So yeah. I hope I haven't completely burned my bridges with everyone here- you guys are cool. Things have been pretty difficult and I've not been right in the head. I've said things I now deeply regret and generally been overly prickly, but that's all on me. I'm hoping now I'm in a better place I can move on a bit.

In any event, I hope everything's been alright for everyone.

'Till all are one.

It's OK.
We all go through rough times.

Do you have a counselor or anyone you can talk to that can help?

Hopefully now that things are moving in the divorce you'll be subjected to less stress. It sounds like your father is being an unnecessarily difficult jerk about things. 5 years? Come on. Otherwise I can't comment or make judgments, I don't know the rest of the facts. I will say one thing. I think that even the concept of alimony is bullshit, not to mention some of the amounts that some men are forced to pay after divorce. Once the legal union is over, the parties should go their separate ways. The only thing a divorced parent should pay is child support if there are children involved. That's it.

As for how you acted, I'll let you deal with those whom you had issues with. I was not one of those people. I will tell you this, though. Don't ever apologize for having different opinions and views on social issues (or anything else) just because some people might get offended. If they can't handle different points of view, that's their problem, not yours.

Welcome back.

Welcome back, Black Hat. I too recently broke up with my ex-husband after nearly 5 years together. I thought we were a happy, loving couple until one day he revealed to me he'd been hiding that he didn't love me anymore. I couldn't believe it. It still hurts, how sudden it all was and he doesn't understand how hurt I am by him giving up on me and also leaving me with no money or food. But Im beginning to heal now, as you will in time too. It's very hard, but despite all the emotional pain, it's the start of a new beginning. That's how Im taking it. Im on the road to a new life of success.

Rodimus Prime wrote:I will tell you this, though. Don't ever apologize for having different opinions and views on social issues (or anything else) just because some people might get offended. If they can't handle different points of view, that's their problem, not yours.

Secondary to that, if you can't handle someone else's rebuttal (or potential accusations as a result) of your point of view - then don't make it.

Sounds like a mucky divorce, anyway. Stress of that kind can make you say\do things you never would normally as well. Hopefully it'll all calm down now and Seibertron can be a nice place to come relax with friends, rather than argue.

Amelie wrote:

Rodimus Prime wrote:I will tell you this, though. Don't ever apologize for having different opinions and views on social issues (or anything else) just because some people might get offended. If they can't handle different points of view, that's their problem, not yours.

Secondary to that, if you can't handle someone else's rebuttal (or potential accusations as a result) of your point of view - then don't make it.

Quoted for truth.