The Energon Pub

I was looking on the site Office Confessions and thease popped in my head if they are not funny I apologies before hand. But add your own if you want...

When I am on night patrol I like to scare humans with my eyes by looking in windows while they are watching a scary movie or in the process of mating…

Because of the fuel prices I have been stealing fuel from human cars…

CAN WE GET THE HUMANS TO NOT POP IN AND ASK STUPID QUESTIONS THAT ARE DUH! AND I MAY BE A ROBOT BUT I STILL SMELL YOUR FREAKING FLATULENCE UGH DISCUTING WILL THE FAT ONE PLEASE NOT EAT SO MUCH GAS INDUCING ORGANIC MATTER!

I know I am an autobot but…I think out of the decepitcon seeker jets, Starscream is really the best looking. I mean look at him Starscream is hot!!!

I know freedom is the right of all sentient beings and we don’t harm humans but Primus Some humans I wanna just pummel to the ground some days.

Me see sludge get belly rubbs by nice old lmady and fed treats I get mad!

Sludge want more treats from nice old lady?

I had to for the 60th billionth time prevent my brother from getting an electric hot pink paint job. Hello! Pink ya son of a!!!

Sky

Sometimes the Seekers choose sides in human air battles and join in, taking bets on who will win. Starscream is notorious for switching teams just to confuse the humans and "mix things up a little." Somehow though, he always wins.

Autobot I am but on Halloween I loved to scare the thugs around town..by Transforming into dragon form and just saying boo.

Savage wrote:Sometimes the Seekers choose sides in human air battles and join in, taking bets on who will win. Starscream is notorious for switching teams just to confuse the humans and "mix things up a little." Somehow though, he always wins.

True...and it sounds HELLA fun too! And, yes, Starscream usually does win...usually!

One time... I painted myself white and pretended to be a broken down racing beetle. Prime really busted my chops over that, let me tell you...

Pyrostrata wrote:

Savage wrote:Sometimes the Seekers choose sides in human air battles and join in, taking bets on who will win. Starscream is notorious for switching teams just to confuse the humans and "mix things up a little." Somehow though, he always wins.

True...and it sounds HELLA fun too! And, yes, Starscream usually does win...usually!

Until he fights Megatron, at least. Once Megs enters the fight, it's nothing but pain for Starscream.

Black Bumblebee wrote:One time... I painted myself white and pretended to be a broken down racing beetle. Prime really busted my chops over that, let me tell you...

One of my favorite things to do is go out very early in the morning and fly around until I find a neighborhood street all lined with parked cars. There I land very quietly so not to wake humans up, but I walk down the street and tap on the cars to activate the car alarms, making a nice cacophony of glorious noise. I especially like it when I get all the dogs in the houses barking and the awakened owners shouting and cursing at them to shut up. When the people come out to turn off the alarms, naturally they notice me, but I like being the center of attention. I smile real big, wave my hand like those beauty queens do on the floats in a parade, and say: "This has been an early morning wake up call courtesy of Jesiree. I hope you have a safe and productive day!" Then I fly off laughing.