The Energon Pub

[The Happy Locust]

So, I drank this bottle of X-tra Strength Turbo Mega Giga Super Lax. It's supposed to--

*Shadowman's ass instantly acts as if it were a Howitzer powered by Rage Personified.*

OWWWWW.

*Locust finds himself flattened against an opposing wall by the sheer force of the attack.*

Oddly, this is only the 5th most humiliating defeat involving farts in my life in the last decade.

*Locust falls from the wall, leaving a Locust-shaped clean spot on the wall surrounded by "earth tones"*

It's still not as bad as that time I tried en-air-G. I still have nightmares about that day!

what about the sweaty sumo wrester that sat on you?

Just because I put on 600lbs and didn't watch where I sat, you guys won't let me live it down...

I'd make an ass joke, but the recoil from what just happened sent my digestive tract somewhere around Alpha Centauri.

Oddly enough, I'm really hungry.

have a hod dog I found.

I doubt any of you have read the Ghost rider comic "Road to damnation", but there's a devil who takes a biker and shoves his head up his ass. "By the way, your new name is buttview".

Ghost Rider- Um... I think your friend is having some trouble with digestion.
Demon- Imagine how it feels for him.

[Shadowman]

So, I drank this bottle of X-tra Strength Turbo Mega Giga Super Lax. It's supposed to--

*Shadowman's ass instantly acts as if it were a Howitzer powered by Rage Personified.*

OWWWWW.

*Locust finds himself flattened against an opposing wall by the sheer force of the attack.*

Oddly, this is only the 5th most humiliating defeat involving farts in my life in the last decade.

*Locust falls from the wall, leaving a Locust-shaped clean spot on the wall surrounded by "earth tones"*

It's still not as bad as that time I tried en-air-G. I still have nightmares about that day!

what about the sweaty sumo wrester that sat on you?

Just because I put on 600lbs and didn't watch where I sat, you guys won't let me live it down...

I'd make an ass joke, but the recoil from what just happened sent my digestive tract somewhere around Alpha Centauri.

Oddly enough, I'm really hungry.

have a hod dog I found.

Okay, I will.

*Eats.*

AAAAARGH! THE PAIN! THE UNIMAGINABLE PAIN!

Hey, this isn't a hot dog. No, this is a blender.

*Tries to eat again.*

AAARGH! WHY DID I TAKE ANOTHER BITE?!?!

[UFO]

So, I drank this bottle of X-tra Strength Turbo Mega Giga Super Lax. It's supposed to--

*Shadowman's ass instantly acts as if it were a Howitzer powered by Rage Personified.*

OWWWWW.

*Locust finds himself flattened against an opposing wall by the sheer force of the attack.*

Oddly, this is only the 5th most humiliating defeat involving farts in my life in the last decade.

*Locust falls from the wall, leaving a Locust-shaped clean spot on the wall surrounded by "earth tones"*

It's still not as bad as that time I tried en-air-G. I still have nightmares about that day!

what about the sweaty sumo wrester that sat on you?

Just because I put on 600lbs and didn't watch where I sat, you guys won't let me live it down...

I'd make an ass joke, but the recoil from what just happened sent my digestive tract somewhere around Alpha Centauri.

Oddly enough, I'm really hungry.

have a hod dog I found.

Okay, I will.

*Eats.*

AAAAARGH! THE PAIN! THE UNIMAGINABLE PAIN!

Hey, this isn't a hot dog. No, this is a blender.

*Tries to eat again.*

AAARGH! WHY DID I TAKE ANOTHER BITE?!?!

That reminds me of a thing my friend says alot.

AHHH!! GAH!! WHY I DO THAT?!

I have some weird ass friends.

[Tweezy]

So, I drank this bottle of X-tra Strength Turbo Mega Giga Super Lax. It's supposed to--

*Shadowman's ass instantly acts as if it were a Howitzer powered by Rage Personified.*

OWWWWW.

*Locust finds himself flattened against an opposing wall by the sheer force of the attack.*

Oddly, this is only the 5th most humiliating defeat involving farts in my life in the last decade.

*Locust falls from the wall, leaving a Locust-shaped clean spot on the wall surrounded by "earth tones"*

It's still not as bad as that time I tried en-air-G. I still have nightmares about that day!

what about the sweaty sumo wrester that sat on you?

Just because I put on 600lbs and didn't watch where I sat, you guys won't let me live it down...

I'd make an ass joke, but the recoil from what just happened sent my digestive tract somewhere around Alpha Centauri.

Oddly enough, I'm really hungry.

have a hod dog I found.

Okay, I will.

*Eats.*

AAAAARGH! THE PAIN! THE UNIMAGINABLE PAIN!

Hey, this isn't a hot dog. No, this is a blender.

*Tries to eat again.*

AAARGH! WHY DID I TAKE ANOTHER BITE?!?!

That reminds me of a thing my friend says alot.

AHHH!! GAH!! WHY I DO THAT?!

I have some weird ass friends.

Don't we all?

[Psycho Warrior]

So, I drank this bottle of X-tra Strength Turbo Mega Giga Super Lax. It's supposed to--

*Shadowman's ass instantly acts as if it were a Howitzer powered by Rage Personified.*

OWWWWW.

*Locust finds himself flattened against an opposing wall by the sheer force of the attack.*

Oddly, this is only the 5th most humiliating defeat involving farts in my life in the last decade.

*Locust falls from the wall, leaving a Locust-shaped clean spot on the wall surrounded by "earth tones"*

It's still not as bad as that time I tried en-air-G. I still have nightmares about that day!

what about the sweaty sumo wrester that sat on you?

Just because I put on 600lbs and didn't watch where I sat, you guys won't let me live it down...

I'd make an ass joke, but the recoil from what just happened sent my digestive tract somewhere around Alpha Centauri.

Oddly enough, I'm really hungry.

have a hod dog I found.

Okay, I will.

*Eats.*

AAAAARGH! THE PAIN! THE UNIMAGINABLE PAIN!

Hey, this isn't a hot dog. No, this is a blender.

*Tries to eat again.*

AAARGH! WHY DID I TAKE ANOTHER BITE?!?!

That reminds me of a thing my friend says alot.

AHHH!! GAH!! WHY I DO THAT?!

I have some weird ass friends.

Don't we all?

I AM that weird friend usually.

[UFO]

Okay, I will.

*Eats.*

AAAAARGH! THE PAIN! THE UNIMAGINABLE PAIN!

Hey, this isn't a hot dog. No, this is a blender.

*Tries to eat again.*

AAARGH! WHY DID I TAKE ANOTHER BITE?!?!

That reminds me of a thing my friend says alot.

AHHH!! GAH!! WHY I DO THAT?!

I have some weird ass friends.

Don't we all?

I AM that weird friend usually.

I second that.

Hi! I'm Sonic Bananahammer-Robopudding-Haburgerfeet! How are you today?

[The Happy Locust]

And next up in the talent competition, Inner City Yodeling. First up, Randy!

[UFO]

And next up in the talent competition, Inner City Yodeling. First up, Randy!

I brought some frozen tomatoes to fling at his stomach.

[Psycho Warrior]

My snake is shedding her skin. I'll have to feed her soon.

[Halo]

My snake is shedding her skin. I'll have to feed her soon.

Feed her the blood of innocents.

[The Happy Locust]

I hope this isn't too graphic... but here goes...


Hey everyone, Locust just hired himself an assistant. Everyone say hello to Buttview.

[Psycho Warrior]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

[Halo]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Ditto.

[The Happy Locust]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

[UFO]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

[The Happy Locust]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

[Psycho Warrior]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

If I don't see it it's not illegal.

[UFO]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

So is the corporate world.

Anyway. I wanna tell someone this. My dad just came how from work about 10 minutes ago, and he said that it smelled like the neighbors are smoking pot. Earlier today I saw our new neighbors's kids (3 of em about 5 years old) running around the alley without shirts or shoes on. I walk out on the porch to throw something into the recycle bin and I smell it. Very strong. Now I'm having some trouble typing and have to concentrate to write this. And Mom says it smells like it's starting to seep into the house. You think we should call the cops? Though...they never bother with my neighborhood anyway, so I just will have to deal with it. I hate this, every new neighbor that has moved into the house next door has done something bad. One new one every year. One year, loud drinking parties in the gradge. Then some guy wanted to fight my Dad for no reason. Now this....I used to live into a nice neighborhood. Until our next door neighbors moved out. Now only craizies will buy the house because of it's location and the fact that their charging a ridiculous amout for it. And now I hear random screaming and laughing for over there. Smoking around (and when you have) children....the nerve of some people...

[Psycho Warrior]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

So is the corporate world.

Anyway. I wanna tell someone this. My dad just came how from work about 10 minutes ago, and he said that it smelled like the neighbors are smoking pot. Earlier today I saw our new neighbors's kids (3 of em about 5 years old) running around the alley without shirts or shoes on. I walk out on the porch to throw something into the recycle bin and I smell it. Very strong. Now I'm having some trouble typing and have to concentrate to write this. And Mom says it smells like it's starting to seep into the house. You think we should call the cops? Though...they never bother with my neighborhood anyway, so I just will have to deal with it. I hate this, every new neighbor that has moved into the house next door has done something bad. One new one every year. One year, loud drinking parties in the gradge. Then some guy wanted to fight my Dad for no reason. Now this....I used to live into a nice neighborhood. Until our next door neighbors moved out. Now only craizies will buy the house because of it's location and the fact that their charging a ridiculous amout for it. And now I hear random screaming and laughing for over there. Smoking around (and when you have) children....the nerve of some people...

Sounds like our old renters. >.>;

[Halo]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

So is the corporate world.

Anyway. I wanna tell someone this. My dad just came how from work about 10 minutes ago, and he said that it smelled like the neighbors are smoking pot. Earlier today I saw our new neighbors's kids (3 of em about 5 years old) running around the alley without shirts or shoes on. I walk out on the porch to throw something into the recycle bin and I smell it. Very strong. Now I'm having some trouble typing and have to concentrate to write this. And Mom says it smells like it's starting to seep into the house. You think we should call the cops? Though...they never bother with my neighborhood anyway, so I just will have to deal with it. I hate this, every new neighbor that has moved into the house next door has done something bad. One new one every year. One year, loud drinking parties in the gradge. Then some guy wanted to fight my Dad for no reason. Now this....I used to live into a nice neighborhood. Until our next door neighbors moved out. Now only craizies will buy the house because of it's location and the fact that their charging a ridiculous amout for it. And now I hear random screaming and laughing for over there. Smoking around (and when you have) children....the nerve of some people...

Sounds like our old renters. >.>;

Sucked, huh?

[Tweezy]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

So is the corporate world.

Anyway. I wanna tell someone this. My dad just came how from work about 10 minutes ago, and he said that it smelled like the neighbors are smoking pot. Earlier today I saw our new neighbors's kids (3 of em about 5 years old) running around the alley without shirts or shoes on. I walk out on the porch to throw something into the recycle bin and I smell it. Very strong. Now I'm having some trouble typing and have to concentrate to write this. And Mom says it smells like it's starting to seep into the house. You think we should call the cops? Though...they never bother with my neighborhood anyway, so I just will have to deal with it. I hate this, every new neighbor that has moved into the house next door has done something bad. One new one every year. One year, loud drinking parties in the gradge. Then some guy wanted to fight my Dad for no reason. Now this....I used to live into a nice neighborhood. Until our next door neighbors moved out. Now only craizies will buy the house because of it's location and the fact that their charging a ridiculous amout for it. And now I hear random screaming and laughing for over there. Smoking around (and when you have) children....the nerve of some people...

Sounds like our old renters. >.>;

Sucked, huh?

You could always point a steel pipe at their faces and they *might* mistake it for a gun....

[Halo]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

So is the corporate world.

Anyway. I wanna tell someone this. My dad just came how from work about 10 minutes ago, and he said that it smelled like the neighbors are smoking pot. Earlier today I saw our new neighbors's kids (3 of em about 5 years old) running around the alley without shirts or shoes on. I walk out on the porch to throw something into the recycle bin and I smell it. Very strong. Now I'm having some trouble typing and have to concentrate to write this. And Mom says it smells like it's starting to seep into the house. You think we should call the cops? Though...they never bother with my neighborhood anyway, so I just will have to deal with it. I hate this, every new neighbor that has moved into the house next door has done something bad. One new one every year. One year, loud drinking parties in the gradge. Then some guy wanted to fight my Dad for no reason. Now this....I used to live into a nice neighborhood. Until our next door neighbors moved out. Now only craizies will buy the house because of it's location and the fact that their charging a ridiculous amout for it. And now I hear random screaming and laughing for over there. Smoking around (and when you have) children....the nerve of some people...

Sounds like our old renters. >.>;

Sucked, huh?

You could always point a steel pipe at their faces and they *might* mistake it for a gun....

Butterfingers work better, because in almost no way can they be considered a weapon.

[Psycho Warrior]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

So is the corporate world.

Anyway. I wanna tell someone this. My dad just came how from work about 10 minutes ago, and he said that it smelled like the neighbors are smoking pot. Earlier today I saw our new neighbors's kids (3 of em about 5 years old) running around the alley without shirts or shoes on. I walk out on the porch to throw something into the recycle bin and I smell it. Very strong. Now I'm having some trouble typing and have to concentrate to write this. And Mom says it smells like it's starting to seep into the house. You think we should call the cops? Though...they never bother with my neighborhood anyway, so I just will have to deal with it. I hate this, every new neighbor that has moved into the house next door has done something bad. One new one every year. One year, loud drinking parties in the gradge. Then some guy wanted to fight my Dad for no reason. Now this....I used to live into a nice neighborhood. Until our next door neighbors moved out. Now only craizies will buy the house because of it's location and the fact that their charging a ridiculous amout for it. And now I hear random screaming and laughing for over there. Smoking around (and when you have) children....the nerve of some people...

Sounds like our old renters. >.>;

Sucked, huh?

You could always point a steel pipe at their faces and they *might* mistake it for a gun....

Butterfingers work better, because in almost no way can they be considered a weapon.

when those renters moved out I found a possum that was dead for so long it was a dryed up husk. IN THE HOUSE.

[Tweezy]

can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

So is the corporate world.

Anyway. I wanna tell someone this. My dad just came how from work about 10 minutes ago, and he said that it smelled like the neighbors are smoking pot. Earlier today I saw our new neighbors's kids (3 of em about 5 years old) running around the alley without shirts or shoes on. I walk out on the porch to throw something into the recycle bin and I smell it. Very strong. Now I'm having some trouble typing and have to concentrate to write this. And Mom says it smells like it's starting to seep into the house. You think we should call the cops? Though...they never bother with my neighborhood anyway, so I just will have to deal with it. I hate this, every new neighbor that has moved into the house next door has done something bad. One new one every year. One year, loud drinking parties in the gradge. Then some guy wanted to fight my Dad for no reason. Now this....I used to live into a nice neighborhood. Until our next door neighbors moved out. Now only craizies will buy the house because of it's location and the fact that their charging a ridiculous amout for it. And now I hear random screaming and laughing for over there. Smoking around (and when you have) children....the nerve of some people...

Sounds like our old renters. >.>;

Sucked, huh?

You could always point a steel pipe at their faces and they *might* mistake it for a gun....

Butterfingers work better, because in almost no way can they be considered a weapon.

when those renters moved out I found a possum that was dead for so long it was a dryed up husk. IN THE HOUSE.

I cannot help but wonder what they were doing to the possum...

[Psycho Warrior]

[quote="Psycho Warrior"]can't quite tell what I'm looking at beyond mr. head-up-arse.

Odd, I thought Mr. Head-up-arse was hilarious.

Locust of Seibertron. The only man dumb enough to hire someone with their head up their butt.

In most businesses, that's a prerequisite for management.

So is the corporate world.

Anyway. I wanna tell someone this. My dad just came how from work about 10 minutes ago, and he said that it smelled like the neighbors are smoking pot. Earlier today I saw our new neighbors's kids (3 of em about 5 years old) running around the alley without shirts or shoes on. I walk out on the porch to throw something into the recycle bin and I smell it. Very strong. Now I'm having some trouble typing and have to concentrate to write this. And Mom says it smells like it's starting to seep into the house. You think we should call the cops? Though...they never bother with my neighborhood anyway, so I just will have to deal with it. I hate this, every new neighbor that has moved into the house next door has done something bad. One new one every year. One year, loud drinking parties in the gradge. Then some guy wanted to fight my Dad for no reason. Now this....I used to live into a nice neighborhood. Until our next door neighbors moved out. Now only craizies will buy the house because of it's location and the fact that their charging a ridiculous amout for it. And now I hear random screaming and laughing for over there. Smoking around (and when you have) children....the nerve of some people...

Sounds like our old renters. >.>;

Sucked, huh?

You could always point a steel pipe at their faces and they *might* mistake it for a gun....

Butterfingers work better, because in almost no way can they be considered a weapon.

when those renters moved out I found a possum that was dead for so long it was a dryed up husk. IN THE HOUSE.

I cannot help but wonder what they were doing to the possum...[/quote]
it was underneath the stairs. How do you not notice a rodent the size of two house cats rotting 10 feet from the washer and dryer?