The Energon Pub

Tim Stimpson wrote:Tim and the Transformers
27 September 2007

If you're wondering about the vintage toy that Fallon has bought Ed for his birthday, let Archers scriptwriter Tim Stimpson explain the allure of Transformers
Tim Stimpson

The time: December 1984. The location: Telford Shopping Centre. The Transformers have arrived on planet Earth, or more specifically in Debenhams, and there's only one Optimus Prime left on the shelves. Fortunately my mum is there to rescue him from the evil clutches of some other desperate mother driven mad by the pestering of her own five year-old child.

Sad as it is to say, pleading to be bought that Christmas present is probably one of my earliest memories, but such was the importance of Transformers to my young life. Over the course of that year the cartoon series had primed me with stories of how the evil Decepticons had pursued the Autobots (and their heroic leader Optimus Prime) from the war-ravaged planet of Cybertron to Earth. With the ability to camouflage themselves as machines from the host planet, the 'Robots in Disguise' continued their battle here… and I was frantic to get my hands on one.

Surely it would be a disappointment? Absolutely not. In terms of toy design The Transformers were a stroke of genius. Not only were they disguised as cars or planes or trucks (what young boy doesn't like playing with them?) but once you'd got bored of racing them around the carpet a few cunning manipulations would transform them into a humanoid robot soldier (and what boy doesn't like robots or soldiers?). The only problem was that no matter how hard you practiced you could never transform them as quickly as they did it on TV.


Tim took this photo of his collection when he was seven years old.

When the cartoon hit the big screen in 1986 (starring none other than Orson Welles) the merchandisers pulled off a marketing coup by thinking the unthinkable and killing the much-loved Optimus Prime. Parents everywhere were forced to go out and buy the replacement Autobot commander, Ultra Magnus, to soothe their grief-stricken children - including me. The raid on their bank balances wasn't over though, when not long after Optimus Prime was resurrected together with a brand new upgraded toy.

Over the years I collected many of the Transformers. However by the time Optimus II hit the shelves I'd begun to grow out of them. Although I still received the new figure that Christmas, within twelve months I'd sold the whole collection in order to raise money for a 'ghetto blaster' to play my Kylie Minogue album on. If only I'd kept them and stashed them in the attic along with my Star Wars toys! Not only would they be worth a lot more now but I'd still be able to transform my original Optimus Prime from big red lorry to valiant robot and back again. Some people wouldn't be jealous of Ed Grundy, but I know I am.