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Growing up is a scary prospect.

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Re: Growing up is a scary prospect.

Postby Scatterlung » Wed Mar 03, 2010 12:44 am

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Serpent O - R wrote:
Scatterlung wrote:I don't mean to use this as a blog, or to whine, but we recently just found out my father's terminal cancer has hit that stage where it's now a rapid decline. He's probably only got about six months.

As insensitive as it might be to say, one half of my brain is glad for the distraction. This should take my mind off all the other things for a little while. I guess this is one of those character building events where I'll learn something new and profound. I just hope it's positive.


When it rains, it pours...

My deepest sympathies to you and your family. Cancer is a ****

As far as your thoughts of being 'insensitive', don't do that to yourself. It's not insensitivity, it's love over-powering the BS of mixed messages we all receive every day.

Now is your opportunity talk to him about all these things you're concerned about. Tell him why you're afraid, scared, concerned. Ask him how he feels about those subjects and how he came to those conclusions. This is going to be your last chance to learn from him, don't miss it... Like I did.

Another thing about these talks you 2 are going to have. It will make him think things of value, a chance to pass on his knowledge to his son. It will also keep him from counting days.

Never ignore anything he has to say, this is the time when he will be at his most honest and sincere.

Tell him you love him...

[these are all things i wish i could have done with my father, but never had the chance, i regret missing it...]

I did this last Christmas, in the knowledge it would probably be our last together. We both know where we stand now (it wasn't a smooth relationship until now). The progression of his cancer was as expected. Terrible but imminent news.

Thanks for the sympathy.
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Re: Growing up is a scary prospect.

Postby Bloodlust » Thu Mar 04, 2010 10:44 pm

Motto: "Motrin and water cures everything"
Weapon: Energo-Sword
Scatterlung wrote:
Serpent O - R wrote:
Scatterlung wrote:I don't mean to use this as a blog, or to whine, but we recently just found out my father's terminal cancer has hit that stage where it's now a rapid decline. He's probably only got about six months.

As insensitive as it might be to say, one half of my brain is glad for the distraction. This should take my mind off all the other things for a little while. I guess this is one of those character building events where I'll learn something new and profound. I just hope it's positive.


When it rains, it pours...

My deepest sympathies to you and your family. Cancer is a ****

As far as your thoughts of being 'insensitive', don't do that to yourself. It's not insensitivity, it's love over-powering the BS of mixed messages we all receive every day.

Now is your opportunity talk to him about all these things you're concerned about. Tell him why you're afraid, scared, concerned. Ask him how he feels about those subjects and how he came to those conclusions. This is going to be your last chance to learn from him, don't miss it... Like I did.

Another thing about these talks you 2 are going to have. It will make him think things of value, a chance to pass on his knowledge to his son. It will also keep him from counting days.

Never ignore anything he has to say, this is the time when he will be at his most honest and sincere.

Tell him you love him...

[these are all things i wish i could have done with my father, but never had the chance, i regret missing it...]

I did this last Christmas, in the knowledge it would probably be our last together. We both know where we stand now (it wasn't a smooth relationship until now). The progression of his cancer was as expected. Terrible but imminent news.

Thanks for the sympathy.


Scatterlung,

You have my deepest sympathies.

I lost my father to cancer 14 years ago.

I'm still reeling from it.

I'm glad you got your chance to talk to him and smooth things over. Don't stop at all. Be there for him every moment you can. I wish I could of been there with my Dad.
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