The Energon Pub

I'm 19 years old, twenty this year. And I'm worried about the world I'm going into. I realise this isn't a place to post thoughts really, but hey.

We hear a lot, as parents, that we are expected to make the world a better place for the children who will inherit it, but I don't think it's often discussed from the other side. I am inheriting this world, but I really don't think I want it.

Anyone who knows me here will know I've been spouting a lot of fairly strange things, but they're things I believe to be true and the knowledge of which does not afford me an ounce of happiness.

The root of my concerns are money. I don't wish for any, I don't hope to have enough, I just wish it'd go away. My understanding is that it's the most crippling, corrupting thing man has made for himself. It was useful once for doling out resources to those who would put it to best use, but now it impedes scientific progress and stops the hungry being fed. Maybe it was always this way, but that doesn't change anything.

My understanding is that we are a very moral species. We try our best to uphold what we think is good and right, what will ensure the future of our race (at least our country). The ubiquitous forces of good and evil are at the base of a lot of our every day judgements. And yet, too, is money. A force which disregards morals outright. Does money flow to good people? No. Does it flow to bad? No. So the best we can do is to hope it gets to the right folks? Can we really take that risk about the force that runs the world?

I'm trying to set up a project here in the UK with The Kingswood Foundation, with The Media Trust and VInvolved, for a Talent Fare. Talented people of employable age come and meet with professionals from local businesses (The BBC, for example) and exchange tips on artistry, editing, and other mediums. The ultimate aim is to simply provide a creative learning experience for these people and help them make connections, celebrating their talents all the way. I like to think this is a good thing, but it wont happen if we don't get money. And it scares me that this goes for everything in the world, not just my little projects.

Why can't we feed the hungry? Because it costs. Why can't we put more research into cures for things? Because it costs. Why do we have this thing again? Only reason I see is to stop the bad people getting guns, but they seem to do that a lot anyway.

So that's the money thing I'm going to have to deal with.

The other thing is Politics. I don't want to sound like another anarchic juvenile, but quite simply, I am scared of our governments. The only thing I have in my life is time. Which I will spend working. The profits of which (money) will go to the government. As I have no interest in money, exactly what benefit am I reaping? I can live and feed myself, barely. And I'm expected to be thankful for that. But this is the 21st Century, isn't it? We can all expect more out of life, can't we?

But, back to government. What worries me is how little say we, the people, get in any of it. We vote a guy in, and then he does whatever he likes. Did America get to vote on any war it got into? I hear the UK is going out to get some of that Falklands oil. Did I say we should do that? Did anyone?

Politics, by my reckoning, is a spectacular waste of time. These people do not turn wrenches or develop medicines, they just throw money in those directions so people will do those things, things which would, in my mind, come about anyway eventually. People with passions for science, biology and such will take it upon themselves to develop cures, because it is in their being to do so.

I'm an artist, and I volunteer to help teach Drama at a local school, not because I am paid to, but because I like it, I'm good at it, and I want to share it. I have been volunteering for three years now, without seeing a penny for some six hour days.

So what are Politicians good for? Making laws, I think. Laws which, incidentally, preserve the government and large corporations and damn the individual, as was the case with the banks, as far as I understand. None of us said we wanted to bail them out, but it happened, and we just sort of... went with it. We saved them because, I think, they were "important", but I think they say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. And what of our morals? Their greed was a bad thing, and yet we let them go unpunished.

Which is another thing that scares me. We just accept our reality. We just accept money, politics, war, death, and all those other things. We all say Politicians are liars, and then we carry on voting, or we curse those damn bankers, and then keep using their service.

Is there some invisible brick wall that stops people acting on what they think? There is, it seems, and it's called Family.

Here I am saying "Fight back! Do something!" but nobody will because they have a family to think about. They have kids and a partner to support, and they don't want to jeopardise that for some cause, instead going for the here-and-now option, which is perfectly understandable. But, as I put that to one side and declare myself defeated, I still see the rest of the screwed up world and wonder why you're giving it to me. I should want to raise my own family in this? No, to be honest, I wouldn't. But what can I do? I have to feed myself, and that costs money. I could write to my congressman or my local MP, but they're liars just saying things to get me to vote for them. So I guess I'll just keep on going with this, and try my best. I wont be happy about it, but apparently that's what being 'free' is all about.

I'd honestly give anything for somebody to convince me otherwise. To show me that, actually, this is the best way. This is the 'right' way. There's clearly a trick to this that I'm missing. I want to be completely wrong.

Why do I come to a Transformers discussion board to have my little rant? Because you're human beings with opinions and views and experiences, and there's nothing about Transformers that stops you from sharing that.

Thanks for reading at least.

You're thinking too much. There is no 'right' way to live life. I'm the same age as you, and I've gone through so many events that have altered my perspective on life. I'm sure there will be more to come, and I can't wait for it, because I know I'll make it out in the end, good or bad.

You need to put more faith into politicians. They are people like you and me who know what they're doing. Heck, from the way you're talking, you need to put more faith in humanity.

I know there are days when you want the world to go away, but you can't continue with that feeling your entire life. There are times to escape, but if you continue to try to escape, you'll become the 'drone' that you fear right now.

Take a step, and believe. Believe in yourself, believe in the people around you. As Humans, we live and die, but don't be dying on the misconceptions you have on money and politics.

...And there is nothing wrong about chatting with the people of Seibertron.com. I created a thread 7 months ago, I was on the brink of myself. I thought I was going to break. Fast forward to right now, and I have to say my life has turned around. I've worked my ass off the past 6 months, I've changed who I am, what I do, and I am becoming the person I want myself to be.

Open your mind and listen to what the people here have to say - it's one of the reasons why I'm in a relationship and have turned F's into A's.

I hate to do that thing where you take apart a person's post and reply to it bit by bit. It always grates but I'm going to do it here and hope you understand it's because it makes it easier to respond.

Blurrz wrote:You need to put more faith into politicians. They are people like you and me who know what they're doing. Heck, from the way you're talking, you need to put more faith in humanity.

Here in the UK, a large group of politicians are in trouble for using tax payers money to buy up second homes and other senseless extras. Without, of course, asking us. What bothers me about politicians and politics is it claims to be a democracy, yet, it decides to go to war whenever it likes, without asking its country. I thought it was here to serve us.

Blurrz wrote:I know there are days when you want the world to go away, but you can't continue with that feeling your entire life. There are times to escape, but if you continue to try to escape, you'll become the 'drone' that you fear right now.

Take a step, and believe. Believe in yourself, believe in the people around you. As Humans, we live and die, but don't be dying on the misconceptions you have on money and politics.

I do wish the world would go away. But I'm told always that this is the wrong thing to feel, as though I have a choice in my feelings. The world has made me, the individual, feel utterly unwanted and unvalued. I have talents nobody asks for, instead I'm told to worry about tax, money, bills, debt, banks, loans, mortgages, politics, war, charity, cars, etc etc. All things I just do not care about. And I'm told always that I'm in the wrong for thinking that way. Yet if I go along with those things, I am completely unhappy.

I have not come to any conclusions through just sitting about and thinking. I've done some limited research, as much as I'll allow myself without getting too depressed. I have a moderate understanding of how things work, I think. In the world we've created, that is.

I understand that capitalism is about self-preservation and little else. If a shop keeper tells you his produce isn't as good as the shop next door, he wont be in business long. So what benefit does he have in telling the truth? Obviously there is a line. Hasbro doesn't give us defective toys and say they're top quality. But they try to see what they can get away with, how cheaply a toy can be made and how much they can raise profits. I understand this to be the mentality of all systems related to money. Self-preservation at almost any cost.

I don't want to live in a world where big corporations will dump waste and damage areas for the sake of saving some cash. Because it does happen. And if the system continues to preserve these institutions despite their obvious flaws, I don't see a very bright future for us.

Swine Flu, for instance. They said Tamiflu was the best you could get, and they shipped in tons of the stuff. Then they tell us that Swine Flu wasn't half as bad as they thought. So all that money you worked to earn and they made you spend it on something you didn't even need.

All I have is my time and that can't be replaced by any amount of money.

Maybe I have been thinking too much, but I honestly can't stop. I don't sleep anymore because my mind doesn't shut up.

And, as much as I hate to throw it out there on the internet for all to see, I've considered suicide often. Not because "boohoo my life is pain </3" but because I am scared of what the world can do to me and the people I love. I don't want to participate in the world man has built for himself, but there is no isolated little island somewhere where they can ship me off to live by myself comfortably. There is, in my eyes, no way out. And that scares the hell out of me.

Well crikey, I've never really had to sell 'how great life is' to anyone. I still think life is something that you have to experience yourself, you can't give up because life isn't going your way. You've got excellent points there, but that's not all there is to it. There's always a second side of the story.

I'm sorry If i'm talking all abstract and what not, but I think that's how I can get through to you. Facts straight, I'm a scientist, I'm an environmentalist. What you're doing right now with Arts is something that I just don't have the imagination or power to. You have your strengths, and I have mine.

When it comes to corporations, it's very hard to trust them. I know that for a fact, and you've listed some good points there. But if you quit now, what's that going to do? The corporations will continue what they're doing. If we don't have a spine, then people higher up will just fold us up and set us aside.

I don't know what the future has in store for us. All I know is that I'm not going to stop because there are negatives happening around the world. There are a lot of positives that you just haven't recognized, or just don't seem to care about.

As an environmentalist last term in one of my courses, we talked about all the 'bad' **** that we've done to the Earth. I had four months of it, and in all honesty, it was freaking depressing. The best thing about it though? There were always good stories that came out in the end. There were people who stood up for what's right, and it just proves that with the right mindset, motivation, and perseverance, anything can be done.

About Suicide. I don't want to say anything about how serious it is, you've probably been told about it a billion times. You're the same age as me, so I'll let that go. But know this, it hasn't been rainbows and pancakes for everyone here. Everyone who has grown up in this world has had their difficulties. Some bend, and some break. It's hard to stand up to the many insults the world throws at us, but in order to survive, we have to fight back.

I don't want you to give up, you're too smart of a person to have this happen to you. Just know that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. You're young, you're smart, you've love people in your life. If you give up now, you're throwing all of that away.

Enjoy yourself. Believe in yourself.... Be yourself. Keep your brain in your head, and I know you will do just fine.

Blurrz wrote:You're thinking too much.

I disagree, there is no such thing as thinking too much. Rather, I think he's too pessimistic. You need to keep thinking but never give up, knowledge is power.

You have the power.

I am a misanthropist, I dislike/distrust everybody to a certain extant. But I also believe life is worth living, for in life there lies wonderful things.

While I can't type entire paragraphs, I figured I'd add my bit.

The world is huge, especially when one is on the cusp of leaving teenagerhood. So much you want to do, so much you want to change, and I'm willing to bet you don't know half the stuff you think you want to know yet.

Ah life. It can overwhelm. But here's a small thing of note that can make the jouney easier.

Life is linear, people tell you you have choices to make, and you do; but not as many as you might think you do. We're all products of our past, and the things that we have done influence us to the point that most choices we make aren't really choices at all. The sooner a lot of people realize that, the easier life becomes. Yes there are people starving out there and yes I feel sorry for them and I have donated money (yes, the dreaded money) to various charities knowing that little will change because of me, but I like to think I did something. However, being a product of my past - which was fairly cushy and well off, but certainly not spoiled by any stretch of the imagination - this means that I'm not willing to abandon everything and take off to Zanzibar or wherever to help build a school. Is that a choice, yes. Is it a viable choice, no.

Instead of worrying about growing up, embrace it. My goal, when I'm 70 is to be the insane. I'm going to fake mental episodes just to get strangers close enough to hug, confuse young women as a daughter and tell her stories, and make up war stories about the time I helped capture old what's his name in Afganistan. Everything I do in my life is to make way for that goal. Will I change the world? Unlikely. Am I going to let the system beat me down? Unlikely. I'm going to have the most fun I can have within the system that the system allows. As the system changes, I will too.

Now if you excuse me, I'm going to go count my Transformers while whistling I Feel Pretty

Hey, looks at that, entire paragraphs.

Blurrz wrote:You need to put more faith into politicians.

I can't. I simply cannot put faith into politicians. I live in a country where our governing body conducted a test to see how well they could filter the internet, it failed miserably but they're going to go ahead and filter the Australian internet feed so that we can be on par with China's censorship regime.

I live in a country where our governing body has banned small breasts in adult related media simply because they're "too much like a child".

I live in a country where our politicians put in place schemes that lead to a number of deaths and property destruction but do not take the blame but rather pass it off onto those that did the work that caused the death and destruction then turn around and abolish the scheme that started it all.

The worst part is while they "oppose" the current government's policies, if the alternative government got into power they'd just do the same thing. So I can see why Scatterlung doesn't trust politicians, not all of them get into power to do good, the bulk i've seen do it for personal gain and ignore common sense.

Now as for growing up ... yeah, it is scary. You get more responsibility, you have to take charge of your own life, but you just do it.

There's a lot of crap out there that's going to get flung your way, nothing you can do about that. You just have to deal with it, but never let it stick and drag you down.

Best way to enjoy life? Get out there and do good, which I see you're trying to do with your project. Doing good isn't always easy, but at least you can look yourself in the mirror and KNOW that YOU are a good person, let it fill you with pride, and THAT will get you through life as long as you NEVER GIVE UP.

And do what Mkall does, start practicing to be old. I too often put on an old person's voice for the sake of sillyness, and as I said to the girl I work with the other day, even if I don't sound like that when I get old, i'm going to fake it anyway.
(And sit on my porch with a shotgun yelling at kids when they walk past)

Go With the flow.

i think it was the great George Carlin who said "It's not enough to teach our kids to read. We need to teach them to question what they read."

Coughler wrote:Go With the flow.

Agreed. I don't question my government, because there's nothing about it that hasn't already been questioned, so I doubt asking one more time is going to suddenly fix everything. I don't worry about where my tax money is going or what country is being taken over this week. And you know what? I'm happy. There's no better place to be than that spot where ignorance meets just not caring. Knowledge is power, sure, but this thread shows us there's clearly a point where knowledge can have unpleasant side-effects. And I don't think the stress and worry and depression is worth it. I just go with the flow and have faith that I'll live a good happy life.

Mkall wrote:Instead of worrying about growing up, embrace it. My goal, when I'm 70 is to be the insane. I'm going to fake mental episodes just to get strangers close enough to hug, confuse young women as a daughter and tell her stories, and make up war stories about the time I helped capture old what's his name in Afganistan.

Well I know how I'm spending my Sunday.

The world is a scary place.

Those few who have the power thru corporations dominate much of that which effects the many, their actions dictated by the bottom line. your concerns mean nothing to them. you are simply a number in their database, existing solely as a possible source of revenue.

Those we trust and give power to govern us, make highly questionable actions and spout about moral responsibility while showing us time and again how corrupt and morally ambiguous some truly are. While most of us are given the chance to stand up against and question those actions in the poles, we constantly revote people who have forsaken the people who form the basis of their power.

Any time your MP/Senator/Representative votes with his Party instead of in the best wishes of their constitutes, they fail you.
Any time they raise their paycheque, while you have your taxes raised, they fail you.
Any time an elected official shows time has passed them by when they fail to understand the basics of current technology/society, they fail you.

And nothing changes because the political systems even within so called democratic countries aren't open enough for the public to enact any change. You can vote one person you trust to change the system, they get elected and it's not enough, as the parties will drag them down into the hypocrisy, or they find that standing on their own they just can't challenge anything. The only way it could happen is to have a dramatic shift. Have enough people interested in being real change and elect them in all at once. but of course this will never happen, because everyone would freak out at possibly wasting their vote and go for the party candidate.

It's sad to say but the best course of action is to try and live the best life you can under the system you find yourself in. But if and when those special moments that can change everything occur, if you believe in the cause behind them, then step up and be heard. We may never eliminate poverty, or unite the planet, but look what has happened with the changes that tore down the Berlin Wall, and the independent nations once part of the Soviet Union but now under their own flags. Change is possible, but it won't happen if nobody stands up for it.

Shadowman wrote:

Coughler wrote:Go With the flow.

Agreed. I don't question my government, because there's nothing about it that hasn't already been questioned, so I doubt asking one more time is going to suddenly fix everything. I don't worry about where my tax money is going or what country is being taken over this week. And you know what? I'm happy. There's no better place to be than that spot where ignorance meets just not caring. Knowledge is power, sure, but this thread shows us there's clearly a point where knowledge can have unpleasant side-effects. And I don't think the stress and worry and depression is worth it. I just go with the flow and have faith that I'll live a good happy life.

Mkall wrote:Instead of worrying about growing up, embrace it. My goal, when I'm 70 is to be the insane. I'm going to fake mental episodes just to get strangers close enough to hug, confuse young women as a daughter and tell her stories, and make up war stories about the time I helped capture old what's his name in Afganistan.

Well I know how I'm spending my Sunday.

A positive atttitute goes a long way with being happy with life. Makes things less stressful.

Here's my philosophy:

Don't take life to seriously, nobody ever gets out alive.

And for kicks:

Time is the best teacher, unforutnately it kills all of its students

I don't remember who said those, but they help me get by, along with a bunch of Murphy's Laws of Combat.

Your concerns are legitimate, but far too serious. You're 19 years old. You seriously don't want to be this uptight. You shouldn't expect to go through life acting like an idiot and have everything be okay, but you should at least try and have fun and enjoy what you do have. (No, I'm not saying you're ungrateful or anything like that. I'm not trying to judge you, not one bit.)

I spent many a year wondering "What if?!" and I've wasted precious, precious time. I'm 29 and feel like I'm a 40/50 something has been. I didn't go out and party and drink my brains out or sleep around during my 20's (which I'm not saying you or anyone should go out and do), I realized I wasn't quite like my peers.

While they were having fun and partying and meeting people who would probably end up being their mate for life, I was too busy sitting around and worrying about things that are completely out of my control, and too tired to give a damn about the things that are in my control.

I'm still uptight (I can admit it, I'm a prick honestly.) and I shouldn't be. It's not fun. The problem is, once you burn it into your brain and get set in your ways it's a difficult process to change gears after years and years of thinking a certain way.

Don't do what I did. Go and live your life, try and have fun. Part of living life is falling flat on your face and picking yourself back up. It's a line from a movie, but it's profound: "Why do we fall, Master Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves up."

We see the movies with the badass silent hero who speaks softly and carries a big stick and is the only person standing between us and disaster, and it's so cool. Problem is, it's not healthy. That's not how life should be lived. The Jedis look all cool with their mysterious beliefs, neat Lightsabers and incredible powers, but the weight of that responsibility, the demands that it makes....is not an easy life to live. Look at what happened to Anakin.

Another good example... G1 Optimus Prime compared to Bayverse Optimus. G1's Prime knew when to have fun and was just one of the guys most of the time. Bayverse Optimus has a lot of weight on his shoulders and carries the guilt of his race's intrusion on our world. He never smiles, he's never upbeat, and he's always burdened. He's a great character and I love the movies, but he's also sad. Neverending sad. In the end he was able to save Earth from The Fallen, but there was no joy to be had. The last words of the film were his message stating that their race will most likely die out and that they'll only live on in memories when it's all said and done. Oh joy. Oh wow.

People choose to live like that too. They don't have to. Hell, soldiers fighting in the war even know when to say "Hey man, I'm gonna have a beer. I've earned it." They have families, they laugh, they cry, and their job is one of the absolute worst in the world. Yet they choose to live and survive.

No one knows what tomorrow will bring, no one knows where it's all going next, but you know what? We're not always meant to. Sometimes we're supposed to just live in the moment and enjoy it.

You only have to worry to this level, if you choose to. You can also choose to have a good, fun time.

It's all up to you. Just don't waste it wondering...

You cannot live while hiding from life.

A man must find his place in life, or he is a wandering fool, never content, never at peace, bringing discord with him wherever he goes.

It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness .

Yes it is. And despite everyone's honest and good advice to not take things too seriously, there's really only one rule in this or any other life: Be true to yourself. Do what's right for you. FIne, maybe that counts as two rules.
The fact is that most of the things we are told to be excited about or to worry about or to be happy about are general ideas of what should elicit those responses, but they don't have to elicit them in everyone.
I don't trust too many people, least of all politicians. But I'd trust a politician over a religious leader because at least the politician is cognizant of the fact that he's lying to you. You are right to question the world you live in, you're right to question everything, even all the people here who are giving their opinions. Sorry, honestly, to be all Derrida about this, but the only way you find truth is by peering into the slight cracks in the core of the issue and searching there.

I'm sorry, I got cut off by some stuff. I'm not going to take a lot more time, I just wanted to have known that I said this concerning this topic.

There's no right or wrong way to live your life. Just becuase you're 'supposed' to be 'happy' and all that doesn;t mean that you actually have to be. Aside from that, you can find actual happiness apart from everyone elses' recipies for happiness. There is not a universal road that we all have to follow, and if there was we probably woulnd't find the same thing as everyone else finds when we get to the end anyway.
I too would just love it if the rest of the world just vanished. There's only one person on this planet that I care about, and stunningly I guess, it's not me, and as long as that person is alright, I couldn't care any less if everything just went down the crapper. MAybe that what you need to find Scatterlung, is one thing that hangs your moon, regardless of what anybody else may say. Counterpunch has that nice line in his post about a lit candle vs. cursing the darkness, but even that's just an opinion, or an option really. Even that's not the 'right' way of going about things, only your way is.

So while everyone is judging me like they've known me all my life, it's more or less irrelavent, but I'm a halfway decent person. I regularly give to charity and raise my brother and sister like they were my own kids (they're not) after my father died because our mother decided that she didn't want them, and despite their growing up to simply use me for their own gain, I've never dug up the Giving Tree like everyone tells me I should do.

I've taken too much time. I didnt want to do that. I'm also not trying to tell you that you're wrong and life is so wonderful and you're just missing it somehow. No person really has a right to tell anyone that. I guess, I just know how you feel. I'd PM you, but that's bold, and I'm not sure that this whole topic is an invite to real conversation so much as it's your vent-rant alone.

Me? I dont care lol

I guess I should more, but I dont.

That;s what people think of me at least, I do care.

I dont let emotion ruin things and I dont jump up and down at others.

I'm gonna be a daddy really soon(scary thought if ya know me lol). She's always doing the "your not excited" or " U dont care"

No, not exactly, I just work on the 10 fingers, 10 toes philosophy and that everything is there and working and I am fine with it.

Same with the nite mare of a house I have been trying to close on since Dec . For the bang for the buck and what I want, its perfect. I cant make it happen any quicker than the god awful seller and mortage company can .

So I dont much worry about either because in the end its out of my hands till the kid hits the world and the house isnt really mine till i sign on closing day.

I think this thread needs to open up with the original "Touch" playing



I dunno if that helped or not but just worry about the things u can do something about and live with the ones that u cant

I've been watching the thread and replies, refraining from responding until I've thought through what I want to say. You appreciate that with something as sensitive as someone's outlook on life, its easy to lash out at the smallest comment.

I do appreciate the responses altogether though. I'm surprised how many people took the time to read the entire thing and I'm grateful.

Dagon wrote:Maybe that what you need to find Scatterlung, is one thing that hangs your moon, regardless of what anybody else may say.

This would be creativity. I absolutely lose sight of all my issues and problems when I and the people around me are free to be creative. But this was probably the very first time I got told to re-evaluated my outlook. Any creative person will have heard the words "Don't be an actor," "Don't be an artist," "dancer," or "musician", because they're not "Real Jobs". A lot of people are lucky enough to have supporting parents, but I got it from mine that I should hope to be a doctor or a lawyer, and yes, every parent kinda wants that, but there's come a point where what they want and what you want (and are) come into direct opposition and it's not funny anymore. Thats where I got. Moreso when I found out this mindset is institutionalised.

Creative, adaptive thinking is on the way out, I've seen it first hand. Children at the start of Secondary School (High School) have this incredible ability to be presented with an open ended task and just get on with it. If you compare this to the behaviour of kids later in the group - even the especially talented ones - they lose this ability. They don't have imagination anymore, nor are they will to try anything for fear of being wrong.

Moreover, teachers are taught to think of the Drama Department as surplus. If kids need to be taken out of lessons, you'll find its mostly the arts. Also, the only compulsory lessons are English, Maths and Science. I was told of a boy who had to be taken from his lessons and put into others for his behaviour. The teacher concerned specifically stated 'Let's not put him in one of the easy lessons like Drama or Art'. And this is what is understood in schools. That the Arts are absolute excess, simply because it isn't black and white and doesn't have "real" answers.

So I could take my art and hold it up to be what gets me up in the morning, but knowing it is treated in this way makes me resentful. It's very much like having someone mock your religion.

Dagon wrote: I regularly give to charity and raise my brother and sister like they were my own kids (they're not) after my father died because our mother decided that she didn't want them, and despite their growing up to simply use me for their own gain, I've never dug up the Giving Tree like everyone tells me I should do.

I often forget how simple my life is at the moment. I have my share of dying relatives and awkward relationships with them and others but I don't really take them to be the absolute focus on my life in any way. In your situation, I would crumble. So all I can do, rather coldly, is back off and view it as a farcical human occurrence. It's a coping mechanism. I care, just too much.

Dagon wrote:Yes it is. And despite everyone's honest and good advice to not take things too seriously, there's really only one rule in this or any other life: Be true to yourself. Do what's right for you. FIne, maybe that counts as two rules.

I'm a firm believer in being absolutely true to oneself. I'm pretty sure I know who I am, which is a huge leap for me from being the kid I used to be. But I'm not interested in me first, I'm interested in others. I ask why others aren't being themselves. Why (superficially) they dress up like celebrities and models and why (a little deeper) they believe work and hardship is the absolute and only way life can be led. I knew a girl who insisted, constantly, that life was about pain, and misery, and that there's no way out of the world, that everything was in its place and it all "worked" and - not to say she was wrong, that's not the issue - it was impossible for me to have her see any other way. What bothered me most though, was that I knew this girl for a long time, and she wasn't like this to begin with.

Counterpunch wrote:You cannot live while hiding from life.

A man must find his place in life, or he is a wandering fool, never content, never at peace, bringing discord with him wherever he goes.

It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness .

I do not choose to hide. I simply choose (or hope) to not participate. I'm here if anyone wants me or my opinions but otherwise... Apart from occasions like this where I come out and ask for help.

I agree though, that it is better to do than to complain. Don't take it that I'm sitting here on my computer being angry all the time. As I've said, I do try and make things happen, but, even when it does work, I still see more to do and it's overwhelming.

Autobot032 wrote:Your concerns are legitimate, but far too serious. You're 19 years old. You seriously don't want to be this uptight. You shouldn't expect to go through life acting like an idiot and have everything be okay, but you should at least try and have fun and enjoy what you do have. (No, I'm not saying you're ungrateful or anything like that. I'm not trying to judge you, not one bit.)

It is no choice of mine to be like this. A lot, in this thread, I'm told I shouldn't feel a certain way, but as I've said, I cannot shrug it off when it bothers me so much. The fact that it consumes my mind so should only be further proof of how indicative it is to me to be concerned.

Autobot032 wrote:We see the movies with the badass silent hero who speaks softly and carries a big stick and is the only person standing between us and disaster, and it's so cool. Problem is, it's not healthy. That's not how life should be lived. The Jedis look all cool with their mysterious beliefs, neat Lightsabers and incredible powers, but the weight of that responsibility, the demands that it makes....is not an easy life to live. Look at what happened to Anakin.

Why, then, do we hold politicians to that high regard I did chuckle when I saw how much praise was lavished on Obama before he'd even done anything. But there he was on TV and I could almost hear "Hero" by Nickleback. Just a silly observation...

Autobot032 wrote:People choose to live like that too. They don't have to. Hell, soldiers fighting in the war even know when to say "Hey man, I'm gonna have a beer. I've earned it." They have families, they laugh, they cry, and their job is one of the absolute worst in the world. Yet they choose to live and survive.

If I ever damn the war in Iraq or the War on Terror, or any war in history, don't assume I despise the soldiers involved. They are indeed to be held aloft for their sacrifices, even if the war itself is senseless. Just another thing I wanted to say...

Bloodlust wrote:Here's my philosophy:

Don't take life to seriously, nobody ever gets out alive.

Noted!

Editor wrote:It's sad to say but the best course of action is to try and live the best life you can under the system you find yourself in.

What if that system impedes the 'best course of action'? And, of course, what if I believed said action called for massive government reform? The system will defend itself from any notion, and the country along with it, simple because, harking back to the creativity bit, we seem to be terrified of novel instances.

In my mind, it all comes back over itself. We teach kids that what's right is right, and what's wrong is unacceptable - rather than to be learned from, rather than to be celebrated as elevating oneself to understanding. In turn, we cannot risk being wrong. And so, we wouldn't dare think of a new way of life in case it's even worse than what we have. But, as people have said in this thread, how can you know if you don't take that chance? What worries me interminably is that we may have reached a point of no return. Unfulfilled, corporately-run lives, but too scared to do anything about it.

Shadowman wrote:

Coughler wrote:Go With the flow.

Agreed. I don't question my government, because there's nothing about it that hasn't already been questioned, so I doubt asking one more time is going to suddenly fix everything.

You and me have never been on the same page Same goes for this. My vote is just one more vote in a list that, I hope, keeps growing.

Name_Violation wrote:i think it was the great George Carlin who said "It's not enough to teach our kids to read. We need to teach them to question what they read."

Yes. Just... Yes.

Burn wrote:There's a lot of crap out there that's going to get flung your way, nothing you can do about that. You just have to deal with it, but never let it stick and drag you down.

But why must I just accept this stuff? For me and a few people I know, the mere mention of these inconveniences is enough to drive us nuts.

I want to try to explain... As you can probably tell, I do a lot of thinking, and I like to think its to my credit. I think, I think about a lot of things, about big - huge - things. I think about the universe, the possibility of life after death, about humanity, about the totality of the universe, and all those wonderful things and I'm astounded at it all.

Then someone dumps some bills in front of me. Or a pay slip. Or a form for benefits. And I ask... How does this help me see the stars? It sounds very, VERY big-headed and obnoxious, but when I looks back down and see these bits of paper, when I listen to people of any age discussing the most inane topics, suddenly EVERYTHING is trivial. Not that anything less is completely unimportant, but to switch from one to the other is... hard for me. And I feel - I know it's not true but I feel - that I'm the only person who is actually using brain power. So should I stop thinking? No, because I like it. I just like to do it alone.

Mkall wrote:Life is linear, people tell you you have choices to make, and you do; but not as many as you might think you do. We're all products of our past, and the things that we have done influence us to the point that most choices we make aren't really choices at all.

I would disagree entirely. I may be the person I am, but that doesn't stop me doing something entirely unforeseen. I mean, physically, there is nothing stopping me from going out, buying a clown costume and waving my tackle at OAPs eating ice cream by the beach. There is nothing physically stopping me making that choice. Psychologically, yes, and that's what you mean by products of our pasts, but suppose one day I just stopped really thinking. It could very well happen. I just could click and go "feh, let's do something silly" and thus, I've made a decision completely uncharacteristic and chaotic, and I've done this in the past. Now, the fact that one person can do something absolutely not the result of everything that has happened before has profound implications for the course of history thereafter. I hope that makes sense...

A better and more cliché example would be a river of water that would otherwise carry on its route undisturbed, until someone throws a rock in and the path must diverge, the countless ripples play off it, drops of water go everywhere, and one small random action has become a whole set of new ones. I'm not prepared to believe life is linear for this very small reason.


I really do appreciate all the responses, guys. It's nice to have a real discussion about something more than the price of eggs. And I don't want to think of this as me ranting. Just trying to help you help me. I want to be happy obviously. And sure, I should probably wait for the life-changing experience that will invariably come to shape my future but as people have said, may as well do something while I can.

I think... I know what I know, about the world, and that's not going to change. There's more to learn, sure, but what I think I need more than empirical knowledge is understanding how to treat it in such a way that I don't undermine its importance, but don't overlook what part of it can make me a more content person.

Phew...

To add something...

I think you need to do some serious and open minded reading on governance. You need to read books on leadership, both the kind that boots people and the kind that recognizes the flaws (yes, read some of The Prince).

When I see, and it was only some of what you wrote, youthful idiology applied to ideas of government, I believe it is almost always misdirected.

I don't expect it to change your mind entirely, but to understand a thing is to know a thing. You apply some large brush strokes to ideas of what government is etc. I think this is a flawed method for a topic of serious study.

I know you're a clever person, so I hope you can empty your cup, so to speak, and think on that kind of material.

Afterall, it truly is western ideas of goverment and their current applications that allow you to say the kind of things you do in public with absolutely no fear of reprisal. That is significant in of itself.

Counterpunch wrote:To add something...

I think you need to do some serious and open minded reading on governance. You need to read books on leadership, both the kind that boots people and the kind that recognizes the flaws (yes, read some of The Prince).

When I see, and it was only some of what you wrote, youthful idiology applied to ideas of government, I believe it is almost always misdirected.

I don't expect it to change your mind entirely, but to understand a thing is to know a thing. You apply some large brush strokes to ideas of what government is etc. I think this is a flawed method for a topic of serious study.

The problem I find is the fact that I should need to study. Maybe I'm misunderstanding what you're suggesting I read, but the fact that politics and the systems that govern our lives are so complicated and in-depth that anyone concerned should have to devote a portion of their free time - in between their working life, family, etc - to reading up on it makes me wonder. In my eyes, a system like this should be so transparent and obvious that to anyone concerned, they are only a glance away at getting a good idea of what's going on. But again, I say this, without having read further into what you're talking about so this might be that youthful ideology you're speaking of.

I know that, if I show concern for these things, it is inevitable that I should have to follow them up with significant amounts of work, research, etc. But I'm going to die one day, and sure, that could well be a long way off, but I don't want the last few days of my life to be spent on a subject I'm only researching in the hope that I can make it go away. If that makes any sense.

Counterpunch wrote:I know you're a clever person, so I hope you can empty your cup, so to speak, and think on that kind of material.

Afterall, it truly is western ideas of goverment and their current applications that allow you to say the kind of things you do in public with absolutely no fear of reprisal. That is significant in of itself.

I wish I could just delete all my knowledge and start again fresh.

Would you go so far as to claim free speech as a Western ideology? Or one that simply occurs more in the West. Obviously there are places where it's not enforced as we do, but I find it a stretch to believe it is ours. I get your point though, I'm effectively biting the hand that feeds, but I only do so in the hope that the one that replaces isn't another that gives and takes away as I feel the present one does.

I've read most of this thread looking for something in particular and I didn't see it, so I'm going to add it here, extremely simplified.

First and foremost, every human on this planet [as well as the handful circling in orbit] has been emotionally 'trained' from the day they were born to react to external stimuli in a particular pattern.

This emotional training comes from our personal loves and fears, given to us by those who fall into either the former or the latter.

Where we are more likely to blindly trust those we love, such as parents, religious icons and so on; we are just as likely to blindly distrust those we fear, whoever may be on that list for each of us, individually.

Our default programing is to survive to reproduce. In order to fulfill this program, we need to acquire sustenance. The concept of love means that you will sacrifice your own sustenance for another, while withholding sustenance from those we fear.

As society advanced, we created law to emulate the aspects of love for those we do not trust. This simultaneously created the aspects of fear for those we otherwise would have trusted blindly. Law was the first step in creating a neutral standing of equality for all.

The next step was to create a generic sustenance for all who lived within the law, money. Before money, everyone was more or less a farmer or hunter, collecting sustenance for themselves and loved ones. After money, a door was opened where members of society could spend their time on other things such as science and industry, trades and crafts, etc. Performing these tasks would earn them money that they could trade to hunters and farmers for food, which they would turn around and use to acquire supplies and information from the non-hunters and non-farmers.

[part 2]

Some people, however, do not have trust in the system. others downright fear it. This distrust can easily develop during a famine. Farmers who need to sell all their crops to maintain their farms now have to use money to buy back some of their own food. Next season, they will be short the money they need to generate the same amount of quality foods.

Artisans who use their money to make goods and tools find themselves short when they need to buy food. They begin to fear for their sustenance by increasing the cost of their product so their fewer sales provide the same amount of sustenance for their loved ones.

Others, not knowing what they may or may not need in the future perform the most detrimental act to a monetary society, they hoard money. Doing this creates an artificial famine of artificial sustenance, money.

Since everyone is fearful during the famines, quantity of money [wealth] determines who will be the most 'secure' and likely to fulfill their program [reproduction].

There are a few ways of handling this famine. Create more money, but in doing so the money supply becomes devalued and everyone becomes slightly poorer. Take the money from the hoarders with taxes... this gets complicated, lets just say this has a hard time working properly.

Another option is war against a rival society to take their sustenance when they refuse to share or sell their sustenance to a suffering society... Nowadays, we go to war to make them sell, mostly.

Enter Greed. The idea that I'm better then you and deserve sustenance more then you, for whatever bs reasons. Greed can also be considered unending distrust of others.

This should be a rough outline that can be extrapolated to cover most of history, in one shape or another.

The undying problem of the world is we developed 2 intertwined societies, one of greed and one of charity. The greedy consider themselves better then the rest while the charitable understand that we are all in the same tiny boat.

The world sucks because the charitable are forced to compete against each other for sustenance by the greedy who want the best/most sustenance for themselves alone.

a final note: not all wealthy people are greedy, most return their money to society in the form of investing and creating work to fill a need of the society. Greedy individuals can be identified by the way they feel about taxes and doing things for the whole of society at their expense.

Global Socialism is the cure for humanities ills. If only we didn't idolize greed and individuality the way we were taught to by greedy individuals and their influences.

Humanity needs to mature before we will have a global, peaceful society... and our purpose is to lead by example.

Just look at it this way. Everyone of us will experience difficulties in life. But hey, be thankful because we are still here... still standing... as what they say, Live your life to the fullest. Many trials will come into ourlives, but there is always an answer to every questions that we might have. We are just starting to grow. As long as you know where you're headed to, as long as you know what you want, you don't have to worry that much. enjoy life!

I don't mean to use this as a blog, or to whine, but we recently just found out my father's terminal cancer has hit that stage where it's now a rapid decline. He's probably only got about six months.

As insensitive as it might be to say, one half of my brain is glad for the distraction. This should take my mind off all the other things for a little while. I guess this is one of those character building events where I'll learn something new and profound. I just hope it's positive.

Scatterlung wrote:I don't mean to use this as a blog, or to whine, but we recently just found out my father's terminal cancer has hit that stage where it's now a rapid decline. He's probably only got about six months.

As insensitive as it might be to say, one half of my brain is glad for the distraction. This should take my mind off all the other things for a little while. I guess this is one of those character building events where I'll learn something new and profound. I just hope it's positive.

When it rains, it pours...

My deepest sympathies to you and your family. Cancer is a ****.

As far as your thoughts of being 'insensitive', don't do that to yourself. It's not insensitivity, it's love over-powering the BS of mixed messages we all receive every day.

Now is your opportunity talk to him about all these things you're concerned about. Tell him why you're afraid, scared, concerned. Ask him how he feels about those subjects and how he came to those conclusions. This is going to be your last chance to learn from him, don't miss it... Like I did.

Another thing about these talks you 2 are going to have. It will make him think things of value, a chance to pass on his knowledge to his son. It will also keep him from counting days.

Never ignore anything he has to say, this is the time when he will be at his most honest and sincere.

Tell him you love him...

[these are all things i wish i could have done with my father, but never had the chance, i regret missing it...]