The Energon Pub

[Jar Axel]

wait, i shot myself in the eye while aiming at locust. what do i win

You get to push the big red button over the trap door that leads to the incinerator.

[Halo]

wait, i shot myself in the eye while aiming at locust. what do i win

You get to push the big red button over the trap door that leads to the incinerator.

Oh boy, barbeque!

[The Happy Locust]

wait, i shot myself in the eye while aiming at locust. what do i win

You get to push the big red button over the trap door that leads to the incinerator.

Oh boy, barbeque!

I've got the knives and the Thongs...

*holds up steak knives and underwear*

Huh? Oh, right. I've got the knives and the Tongs...

*holds up steak knives and meat handler tools*

But if we need thongs, I can supply.

[Halo]

wait, i shot myself in the eye while aiming at locust. what do i win

You get to push the big red button over the trap door that leads to the incinerator.

Oh boy, barbeque!

I've got the knives and the Thongs...

*holds up steak knives and underwear*

Huh? Oh, right. I've got the knives and the Tongs...

*holds up steak knives and meat handler tools*

But if we need thongs, I can supply.

Thongs won't be necessary this time.

[Moonshatter]

*dresses up in a paper bag and does the can-can while throwing ninja stars in the sir and letting them land on her. At the end, it looks like she's covered in a spiky one-piece bathing suit* Ta-da! *lands on one knee with her arms out, in a a pool of her own vital fluids*

How's that for my first week?

[Wheelimus Prime]

*gunshot* not funny, i tried that and i ended up looking like a black guy in a bottom-less thong

[The Happy Locust]

*dresses up in a paper bag and does the can-can while throwing ninja stars in the sir and letting them land on her. At the end, it looks like she's covered in a spiky one-piece bathing suit* Ta-da! *lands on one knee with her arms out, in a a pool of her own vital fluids*

How's that for my first week?

I'm impressed. But you missed a spot.

*Locust flings anothing ninja star, which then ricochets back and lands dead-center in Locust's forehead*

ow... Bikini ricochet shot. ow...

*collapses in a heap*

[Wheelimus Prime]

* hops into a closet with a V8 engine and drives over a ramp*

Yee-haw

* closet slams into the ground 10ft short of the ramp*

im ok

* closet/UW mix suddenly explodes like an atom bomb*

[strained] still ok

* a pack of squirrels start eating the closet*

[The Happy Locust]

* hops into a closet with a V8 engine and drives over a ramp*

Yee-haw

* closet slams into the ground 10ft short of the ramp*

im ok

* closet/UW mix suddenly explodes like an atom bomb*

[strained] still ok

* a pack of squirrels start eating the closet*

You ok?

[Wheelimus Prime]

*metalic liquid starts to form into a human being*

who me, or that guy *camera pans to burning closet wreck, UW's pinkey inches from the wreckage*

UW pinkey: yeah im fine

[The Happy Locust]

Rookie. I'm going back to my office.

*Locust walks up to a pool table and pushes a button. A diving board and ladder extends about 20 feet up*

My old friend. Haven't seen you in years.

*Locust ascends the ladder, bounds off the board and does a triple flip, a half-gainer, and an obscene gesture before vanishing into the green felt of the tabletop*

[Jar Axel]

*Quikly walks over and drops a class C thermal detonater into table behind Locust*



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*the pool table turns into a brilliant ball of white hot flame*

[Wheelimus Prime]

locust, you look hungry let me get you a snack

*opens refridgerator door, hops in, closes door*

muffled through fridge:

UW: yeah, i will have one of everything on the menu, and super-size it. oh and a diet coke.

Clerk: why the diet soda, why not the usual pepsi

UW: well im on a diet and i fugured diet coke

[The Happy Locust]

*Quikly walks over and drops a class C thermal detonater into table behind Locust*



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*the pool table turns into a brilliant ball of white hot flame*

*amidst the smoke and flames, Locust rises from the felt-top of the table wearing sunglasses and a towel. *

I always wanted a sauna. This heat will do wonders for my skin... when it grows back that is.

[Wheelimus Prime]

thats a great idea!

*moves to top floor of the building, opens closet door*

this spot will work perfectly

*random construction noises, animals yelling, and engines revving can be heard*

there "Undead Waffle's tanning is open for buisness, hey a first customer

*random explosions that belong in a michael bay film can be heard, lady comes screaming buck-naked from office*

[Psycho Warrior]

I go away to wallow in filth and here another page as come and nearly gone. That's what I like to see.

[Jar Axel]

I go away to wallow in filth and here another page as come and nearly gone. That's what I like to see.

Board Wars Episode II "Attack of the Spam"

[SoundMaster1]

Wait...what is going on here? I only really read this last page and got really confuzzled.

[Psycho Warrior]

Wait...what is going on here? I only really read this last page and got really confuzzled.

Welcome to seibertron's spam community.

[Shadowman]

Wait...what is going on here? I only really read this last page and got really confuzzled.

Welcome to seibertron's spam community.

Or what's left of it. This place is like a refugee camp after the removal of the Party Forum.

[The Happy Locust]

Wait...what is going on here? I only really read this last page and got really confuzzled.

Welcome to seibertron's spam community.

Or what's left of it. This place is like a refugee camp after the removal of the Party Forum.

Unlike most refugee camps, we have ample food supplies.

*Roasts a Randy over a fire pit while munching on Spam chunks*

[Moonshatter]

Wait...what is going on here? I only really read this last page and got really confuzzled.

Welcome to seibertron's spam community.

Or what's left of it. This place is like a refugee camp after the removal of the Party Forum.

Unlike most refugee camps, we have ample food supplies.

*Roasts a Randy over a fire pit while munching on Spam chunks*

What the--*sniffs the air* is that Spam I smell?! *runs over to where the locust is roasting someone, and asks for a Spam sandwich with extra mayo*

[Psycho Warrior]

What the--*sniffs the air* is that Spam I smell?! *runs over to where the locust is roasting someone, and asks for a Spam sandwich with extra mayo*

Oh, you don't know who randy is?

He's our own little victum character. Don't worry, the cloner always spits out more than we need for... whatever.

[SoundMaster1]

Wait...what is going on here? I only really read this last page and got really confuzzled.

Welcome to seibertron's spam community.

Or what's left of it. This place is like a refugee camp after the removal of the Party Forum.

Unlike most refugee camps, we have ample food supplies.

*Roasts a Randy over a fire pit while munching on Spam chunks*

What the--*sniffs the air* is that Spam I smell?! *runs over to where the locust is roasting someone, and asks for a Spam sandwich with extra mayo*

Oh no... *pulls out Wilfred Brimley blaster and destroys spam* haha!

[Wheelimus Prime]

* UW walks over to eaten randy parts and starts deep roasting randy's eyeblls and serves them with icecream on the side*

yum...