On the job with Doc Ratchet!

trailbreaker says:

“It’s not what it looks like !!”

BG the Robit says:

Ratchet:*hic* excuse me... oops, I *hic* probably shouldn't have *hic* ripped that *hic* off...

trailbreaker says:

"Prime, he's not wearing underwear."

RatchetJazz says:

I always say if they did not have ratchet for medic who would they have

Crashcomet says:

R: EWWW! What IS that?

Heckfire says:

"Sweet PRIMUS! I TOLD you to let the humans off BEFORE you transformed! Geez...someone get me a hose?"

Zeedust says:

"But the MASH reruns made it look so EASY!"

DarkMechJock says:

*RIIIIP* Oops...I hope he didn't need that

Scatterlung says:

Ratchet: Hey Prime! There's the entire first season of Family Guy DVD's in here!

Roadshadow says:

Ratchet: Uhh, Prime? Jetfire's dead.......Yeah, he's dead, Jim.
Prime: For the last time, stop calling me JIM!

Blaster_6267 says:

Ratchet: "The powers source is connected to the transisitor...the transistors connected to the transforming modulor...the..."

Screambug says:

"ewww...yuck...gross...slimy guts!"

Zeedust says:

Ratchet: "Skyfire's only mostly dead. Mostly dead, I can work with."

Prowl Worshipper says:

R: Oops...uh...can someone get me my manual? (To self)I can't remember where this goes...Oh well, it's probably not vital...I hope...
(To Skyfire, falsely cheery) Don't worry, you'll be just fine!
(Yelling) MANUAL!! NOW!!
S: (To se

galvanostril says:

quick nurse! the forceps! the head is crowning!

galvanostril says:

ratchet: I have to tell you the truth... I have no freakin clue what I'm doing.

galvanostril says:

where ratchet stores his beer.

Tiedye says:

Ratchet-"Damit I'm sick of babysitting. "This is the last time I chage diapers!"

Zeedust says:

Skyfire: "I can't feel my legs..."

Ratchet: "The guys who form them are soimewhere around here, I'm sure. We just have to..."

Skyfire: "Doc... I'm not a gestalt."

R

Scooter says:

Ratchet: "Cough please."

Anonymous says:

Ah..er, sorry, Optimus! ...Crap, where am I gonna stash my crystal meth, now?

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: Well no wonder this clown died... his lungs... are filled with... CANDY!!!! *Throws candy for all the other Autobots

Shadow Fox says:

Ratchet- My my my..what a well endowed robot you are (hits him over the head with a crow bar) and you won't be needing your penis now that your dead, maybe I'll finally get arcee's notice with this now!!!

??? says:

look at Skyfire's face and where Ratchet is grabbing him and try to keep a straight face.

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: "PRIME! I better be getting hazard pay for this!"

Anonymous says:

Guys, where's the welding torch? What'dya mean that you didn't bring a torch just because we're in the Arctic?! Ugh, now I'm going to have to do it the old fashion way...eugh. Skyfire, don't just lay t

K-nonFodder says:

I know i am a doctor but since when does an autobot need a Gynocologist?

Anonymous says:

Skyfire: Wait a sec....my chest plate is open , yet his hand is way below it.....

Ratchet: *innocently whistles*

Anonymous says:

This job gets worst every day. How can i fix stuff in this waste land.

Decepticon says:

R:"Uh oh...I'll just throw these extra parts away and pretend like nothing happened *whistle whistle whistle*"

Ricochet says:

How Ratchet gets his extra parts for repairing other Autobots

Anonymous says:

"Ya know, these's something about fixing a junker like this guy that gets ya right here!"

buddhaquest says:

What Prime? Who's out cold? Ha ha, good one Prime? What? What am I doing? Uh... so lonely...

SlagMaker says:

Ratchet: Sorry, I didn't mean to touch that. Hey what's that dripping? Oh gross. Stop smiling!

Shadow says:

OHH NO! You're not using any of your weird devices on me again!

PlasmaRadio says:

Ratchet: "Cough... yep, the're twisted."

Anonymous says:

Ratchet : GAH! I hate these monthly exams, Skyfire. We don't you just TELL everyone your a female Autobot with a glandular problem?

tf dutchie says:

R: For the last time, STOP eating chewing gum!

Anonymous says:

That was a magnifecent Kung Fu pose for "Crouching Bots Hidden Creeps"

Anonymous says:

Skyfire doesn't look like he minds much.

Anonymous says:

Doc after looking around the battle field: "gasp! no! he's dead.
and now megatron is dead also!" after looking at megatron.
who did this massacue? there's got to be almost all the decempatcons and autobots!

Greg says:

good nobodys looking now I can steal some of his parts

zach says:

i'll fix him up later. I wonder if there are any good places where i can buy a cheap burger

Sir Deadend says:

When he entered, little did skyfire know that it was one of ~those~ massage parlour.

Anonymous says:

TV Commentator: "Quiet please, as Dr. Ratchet performs the first ever Cybertronian cesection."

Beast Simpson says:

Now cough.

Anonymous says:

And remember, folks, to get your Autobot spayed or neutered!

Anonymous says:

Due to numerous malpractice suits, the increasingly paranoid Ratchet quickly moved his clinic to the Antarctic, where no one complains...

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: *BURP* Whoa, I don't remember eating that.
Director: CUT!

Anonymous says:

Unfortunately, due to Prime's order of 'radio silence,' Ratchet was forced to communicate the surgical procedure in sign language.

Dee-Kal says:

Jetfire's other use - the ultimate portable beer cooler.

PlasmaRadio says:

Ratchet: "I'm going to have to give you a prostetic leg." (get it, hes a robot, he is prostetic... oh nevermind...)

Skyfire says:

hye pay atetion you going to set my selfdistruct,gezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

MindWipe says:

"oh yeah thats the stuff right there!"
"oh no someones coming!!!"
"i know it was me!"
"oh ok panic over, now do me!"

Broadside says:

Just a little bit lower
Skyfire: Yeah that's good don't stop

Anonymous says:

Optimus, i have a little problem, skyfire has been killed and i stupidly put my lunch inside him, it's just terrible, i'm gonna need some tuna, some fresh garden salad and mayonaise STAT!!!"

Anonymous says:

NO NO PLZ DON'T UR VIOLATING THE DOCTOR PATIENT TRUST SYSTEM, ohh just a little lower hehehe

Master Hound X says:

Ratchet: Oh for god sakes what the hell have you been eatin

SkyFire: ummmmm oil and uhhhhh oil

Anonymous says:

(Sigh)Wheeljack, get my recharger set from headquarters. From the looks of Skyfire, this is going to take all day and all night.

Unicron says:

Ratchet: (thinking) why do i have to be the one who does everything that's gay?

Anonymous says:

ratchet: you might feel some disscomfort.........your liking this arent you

Starscream says:

ratchet: dammit optimus i'm a medic not a...sure sure i'll get right on it

Anonymous says:

Ok, who's the joker that decided to use jetfire as an icecream maker??

RandomFerret says:

"And I thought they smelled bad on the outside!" ..It's a Star Wars reference, people! Laugh it up!

Anonymous says:

Ooh, that's gonna have to come out.

Bruticus Buckeye says:

Ratchet, this prostate exam has taken an hour and a half!

Anonymous says:

Jetfire: "Am i Dead yet?Am i Dead yet?Am i Dead yet?Am i Dead yet?Am i Dead yet?Am i Dead yet?" Rachet: "For the last time Yes."

tfpredaking says:

Now, you want to be a 38-triple Z right? Jetfire: I want Arcce to be jealous!! and Springer to notice me!

Anonymous says:

(Ratchet looks at Prime) Ratchet: He's dead Jim

ryo777 says:

Ratchet: Haha Ha!! Keep making jokes Bluestreak!! Your next on the roster to wash Skyfire's BALLS!!

ryo777 says:

Great, NOW's my chance!! I can try to get that KIDNEY for Sparkplug.

ryo777 says:

Ratchet: I wouldn't of believed it, if I hadn't SEEN it. That Starscream is a FREAKAZOID!! He left teeth marks on Skyfires "nutroids"!

ryo777 says:

Skyfire: Ratchet?
Ratchet:Yeah?
Skyfire: Tell me a story?
Ratchet:AWWWWWW, SHUT UP!!!!!!!

ryo777 says:

F**K OFF!! I said I wanted "To see polar bears", not "PLUCK PUBIC HAIRS!"

ryo777 says:

Ratchet: Glad he's asleep...for a big guy he sure isn't packing MUCH!

ryo777 says:

Ratchet:Hmmmm, I hope the guys don't notice I'm OFF the clock,...I'm REALLY enjoying this.

Anonymous says:

I knew Skyfire was Addicted to Playbot hey look the swimsuit addtion!

BLACKBIRD says:

IF I DID NOT KNOW BETTER,I THOUGHT I SAW A PART OF STARSCREAM IN U

Anonymous says:

Rachet: Oh no...blood.
Skyfire: Stop with...the Dr. Nick..Rivera immitation.

Anonymous says:

Doc: "Oh my god...this thing's the size of a beachball!"

Anonymous says:

HOOKUPS skate shirts in disguise!

And ghey!

BumbleBug says:

R: Well it's a boy all right! but whos the father?

S and R: *glances over to Starscream trying to shuffle away*

S: I WANT CHILD SAPORT!

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: (to Optimus) He's dead, Jim. OP: Oh Ratchet, will you SHUT UP with all the 'Bones' impressions!

gir says:

Ratchet: Hiccup!! oh excuse me guys I had one to many shots of energon..and well you know how it is..hic..um what am I doing again?

Anonymous says:

Youd better not be enjoying this skyfire!!!!!!
Skyfire(giggle) I'm not!

Anonymous says:

Push Mrs Skyfire Push. Dont make me go in and get it

Anonymous says:

Ratchet(looking at T.V.):"If Dr. Carter can do it, then so can I!"

Anonymous says:

yep "your bolt is lose"

Anonymous says:

Ratchet:"Now, what would they do on E.R.?"

Anonymous says:

Rachet: OH GOD! This is the last time I give you a proctology exam.
Skyfire: Sorry

Anonymous says:

Ewwww! I don't know what that thing is, but I've never seen one of 'em before!

Anonymous says:

Ratchet:congratiolations mis skyfire! its a boy!

Anonymous says:

The transistors connected to the, sensor, the sensors connected to the red thing, the red things connected to my wrist watch...uh oh

Anonymous says:

!

Anonymous says:

Skyfire: Ow! Careful where you're putin' your hands Ratchet.
Ratchet: Oh yeah!!!!

Firestorm says:

Now let's see- I just gotta remove this shrapnel from near his fule processor and... whoa! 'Sopranos' is on?!

Hot Rodimus says:

Ratchet-let's see here...(scavangers around)HEY! so thats were my Burito was...

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: See Optimus? I told you he had to much energon last Cycle.

Dynamus Prime says:

Skyfire: Are you sure you know what you're doing? Ratchet: Umm...no...

Chachi says:

R: "Primus, Skyfire, when are you going to quit trying to eat human food?"

Anonymous says:

Now where's Arcee, I wanna go for the malpractice!!!

Anonymous says:

Skyfire, after crushing into the Twin Towers:
It was errgghh... Bin Laden he is a decepticon ally...errggh...

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: This is what you get Skyfire, for crushing into the Twin Towers!!

Bumblebee says:

Ratchet: BEEEP!
Skyfire: NOT funny.

Anonymous says:

Hmm...from this angle Ratchets hands seem to be in the most peculiar area...

Sledge says:

Skyfire gives birth to Wheelie

Vector Sigma says:

Don't worry Skyfire...This sex change operation won't hurt a bit! What? Oh...you're my first one...but don't worry...TRUST me....:)

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: When will you learn... Never tranform when you have passengers.

Bodycount says:

Prime: Ratchet, are Skyfire's modification's complete?
Ratchet: Affirmative, He's officially legal in all 50 states.
Skyfire: Do I get a toy, now?
Prime and Ratchet: NO

Anonymous says:

DAMMIT PRIME I'M A DOCTER NOT A FIXER UPPUR

MEGATRON says:

Okay, he's dead. I'll check his pockets for lose change.

astrotrain's first friend says:

Ratchet: Um, skyfire? Skyfire: yes? Ratchet: WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU ATE OTHER TRANSFORMERS?!!! c'mon out Wheelie, Gears, Starscream, wheeljack...

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: Sorry about having to open you up like this again so close after your first surgery, Skyfire, but you see, I left my wrench in your torso.

Anonymous says:

Skyfire:"Oh, Primus! The pain!!!!"
Ratchet:"Dont worry, Im gonna fix you...Huh?Whats that, Optimus? Skyfire doesnt belong to the Autobot HMO? sigh...Sorry, Skyfire. I have to let you die." Skyfire:"And I thou

Anonymous says:

thats just wrong

Anonymous says:

Ok, one quick hand job and then I have to go to work

Anonymous says:

" OK, that's it...uh oh! Where's my watch???

Anonymous says:

When Ratchet pops out, suddenly everyone realizes Skyfire was a Pretender....

Anonymous says:

AHA! I see the problem..he's using AOL!

Anonymous says:

"He's dead, Jim."

tony says:

"I did warn you about eating Bumblebee like that. Why do the patients never listen to their doctor these days?"

Anonymous says:

rachet,alright i hooked up 2 12s and a amp you should thump the hell out now.skyfire,word

Anonymous says:

I'm a doctor, not a forklift.

Anonymous says:

Corrosion...? Rust...? Oil leak? Why did I sign up as medic?!?

Shadowman says:

Rachet: I think if I pull on this thing I can *Skyfire goes flatline* oops...

Anonymous says:

Okay, keep pushing, I can see a head.... it's a beautiful baby spychanger !

Seibertron says:

This is Seibertron.com's test for "quotes"

Anonymous says:

Jetfire, you'll soon be as good as new! :)

Anonymous says:

Blaster!!! Could you please turn down your volume? I'm trying to work, and I really need to concentrate.

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: Hmmm...has anyone seen my keys?

Sharpshot says:

"That for calling me a nurse , white boy!"

Trailfollower says:

Ratchet: "Oh my Primus, what the Heck is that. AHhhhhhhh, Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: eeeewww....I didnt want to see THAT!

Anonymous says:

"I feel safe with you ratchet, you have a gentle touch."

Anonymous says:

"Whooops..somebody wanna grab that? I may need it later..."

Anonymous says:

Skyfire was the first casualty in a drunken hockey game with Starscream.

TeleTran2005 says:

This is a bad place to put the energon cubes

Scattershot says:

Rachet: Hey, Anybody got any 9 volt batteries?...Anybody?!

davewelttf says:

Ratchet: Ugh! and I thought he smelled bad on the outside!

MEGATRON says:

Okay Quickwind. Now turn your head and cough.

MEGATRON says:

Yhaaa! We just popped this homey Westside!.

axalon says:

s£!t! I m not really a doctor, I just pretended to be

Ratchet says:

I need a Q-tip this big, stat!

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: The bigger they are, the harder they fall!
Skyfire: OK, OK! YOU win! Stop hitting me!

Anonymous says:

R- tell me again how spike got up here

Unknown says:

Ratchet: I said "This looks like a job for a blowtorch", NOT "This looks like a torch for a blowj..." Oh never mind....

Anonymous says:

R:well anybody remember how to give an enema? i dont know how
skyfire:youre saying this now?!

Anonymous says:

R:well anybody remember how to give an enema? i dont know how
other bot:youre saying this now?!

Anonymous says:

Hold still.

Anonymous says:

Ratchet:"The red thing connected to the blue thing, the blue thing connected to my wrist watch, uhoh."

Suzuki says:

Hoo boy... Optimus; I found out what happend to Roller!

Anonymous says:

Hey, does anybody know what this button does?

Scourge says:

Skyfire: Ahhhh! Thanks Ratchet! They were itching like a mofo!

max says:

Okay turn your head and coff.

Hound says:

Ratchet:Turn your head and cough Skyfire:OOWWWWWW your hand is cold warm it up next time!

Anonymous says:

ALRIGHT ONE MORE PUSH.ITS A WHEELE!

Anonymous says:

ALRIGHT WHEELE,GET IN

Mirage says:

damn! got my hand stuck again

Anonymous says:

Sorry, Skyfire, but I forgot to tell you that you have to be nude for this.

Anonymous says:

SKYFRIE CIRCUITS ARE SUCH A PAIN I JUST WANTED
PUNCH SOMETHING HEY CONVOY I MEAIN OPTIMUS COME ON OVER HEAR.

Anonymous says:

SKYFIRE CIRCUITS ARE A SUCH PAIN. I JUST WANT TO
PUNCH SOMTHING HEY OPIMUS COME OVER HEAR .

Anonymous says:

Ratchet:Damn, Skyfire! Starscream fµ©ked you up pretty bad!

Anonymous says:

RATCHET :Who wants to clean his clock?

Jeremy says:

rachet: ouch! pointy, eww slimy, AHH! moveing, aww its only a 20 dallor bill

Sledge says:

Skyfire is giving birth to a Decepticon !!

Megafire says:

"my he has a vast anal orifice"

Anonymous says:

What!? I never use drogs on robots! Only when they dont want to come home whit me and have some party.

Shockwave says:

Bump Bump. Buuuuurrrrrraaaaaappppp!!! Ah, much better.

Anonymous says:

optimus: what the slag?!?! doc: we were just uh
Skyfire: five more minutes?

Royal says:

Skyfire: Ratchet..You are just giving me a checkup right? RIGHT?
Ratchet: Checkup. Right checkup *evil chuckle*

Anonymous says:

Just what the doctor ordered.

Anonymous says:

Rachet- Turn your head and cough
Skyfire- Doc its been 20 minutes take the hand away

Anonymous says:

Of course Im a certified gynocologist

Anonymous says:

I must fix Skyfire!

Anonymous says:

Skyfire: Help....me......help...me....
Ratchet: hmmm....*examines Skyfire but his watch starts beeping* huh?*looks at the time*.whoops, sorry man, Dr. Phil is on right now *rushes off*

Metroplex says:

R:Good god! What did you do to it?

Anonymous says:

Ok Skyfire, Now Direct TV installation is $9.95. You get Mtv2 and QVC. Now if you want WWE Pay Per View, it will cost you extra!

Depth Charge says:

Optimus: Latchet!
Latchet: oh! lunchtime!

Anonymous says:

Oh, I feel like Meg Ryan in City of Angels. Now where is that handsome Nicholas Cage?

Anonymous says:

Just a few more circuits and you will go from Skyfire to Jetfire. Oh, let me put on this Robotech sticker!

Anonymous says:

wow, dude you really should of had this done when you were a babybot. ok, your going to feel a little sting........

Optimus Primevil says:

Ratchet: Hope no one files for malpractice.

Anonymous says:

ooohh...this is fun,lemme see,the red wire connects to the blue one,the blue one connects the green one....

Anonymous says:

this guy can go all day, my right hand is already cramped up...

Anonymous says:

Optimus, pass me the leech!

Anonymous says:

Slag! The contractions are 2 minutes aprt!

Anonymous says:

Score...And they said the female Autobots were long extinct...

Dynamus Prime says:

Uh, guys? My hand is stuck!

primus says:

Skyfire: oh yeah thats the place

Anonymous says:

Ratchet: Ok, who was drinking crude oil around the patient again?!
Tracks: (burp) Oh yeah, that was me. My bad!
Ratchet: What the slag?! What are you doing here?! This is season 1!
Tracks: Oops, sorry!

Anonymous says:

power to the people

Shermtron says:

turn your head and cough.... Phew i said cough skyfire.

FanboyX says:

Man... Why do I always have to be the "fluffer" anyway?

Shermtron says:

Damnit jim im a doctor not a not a blowtorch.

DARKAGEIS says:

guys im stuck, little help!

Terrorscream says:

ok its a boy

Pokejedservo says:

Ratchet: Well your no Arcee, that I can tell you now...

Anonymous says:

You open the legs and fill the cavity with stuffing, tharn roast in oven at 375 for 3 hours

The Matrix says:

Rachet - "EEHHH, now thats nasty..."