The Energon Pub

News Credits: 2 · by **Shadowman** » Tue Dec 09, 2008 10:48 pm

Psycho Warrior wrote:
The Happy Locust wrote:an exit? I'M FREE! I'M FREE!

*Locust squeezes through the hole to freedom. *

I'M FREE! I'M FREE!

*Locust fails to notice his pants are currently still in the hole.*

Drafty. Even more so than before, I'M FREE! I'M FREE!

sadly the police have arrived to place you under arrest for public nudity, conspiring to commit public nudity, nudity without certification, and littering. Guess which is the worst offence.

The one that ended with "there were no survivors." That's my guess.

by **The Happy Locust** » Tue Dec 09, 2008 10:49 pm

Psycho Warrior wrote:
The Happy Locust wrote:an exit? I'M FREE! I'M FREE!

*Locust squeezes through the hole to freedom. *

I'M FREE! I'M FREE!

*Locust fails to notice his pants are currently still in the hole.*

Drafty. Even more so than before, I'M FREE! I'M FREE!

sadly the police have arrived to place you under arrest for public nudity, conspiring to commit public nudity, nudity without certification, and littering. Guess which is the worst offence.

I'm guessing the conspiracy charge. Apparently just the thought of my public nudity has half the force in tears.

by **Psycho Warrior** » Wed Dec 10, 2008 12:39 am

The Happy Locust wrote:
Psycho Warrior wrote:
The Happy Locust wrote:an exit? I'M FREE! I'M FREE!

*Locust squeezes through the hole to freedom. *

I'M FREE! I'M FREE!

*Locust fails to notice his pants are currently still in the hole.*

Drafty. Even more so than before, I'M FREE! I'M FREE!

sadly the police have arrived to place you under arrest for public nudity, conspiring to commit public nudity, nudity without certification, and littering. Guess which is the worst offence.

I'm guessing the conspiracy charge. Apparently just the thought of my public nudity has half the force in tears.

actually, it's the littering. I suggest you go pick up your pants.

by **Wheelimus Prime** » Thu Dec 11, 2008 6:22 pm

*walks in* wtf this place has no tacos

*randomly walks over to a lampshade and plays dressup with it*

*dust bunnies start off with first newspaper, now magizine (guess what it is)

by **Psycho Warrior** » Thu Dec 11, 2008 7:48 pm

Celsius/Fahrenhiet wrote:*walks in* wtf this place has no tacos

*randomly walks over to a lampshade and plays dressup with it*

*dust bunnies start off with first newspaper, now magizine (guess what it is)

Because tacos are devoured on the spot. ... and the taco bell doesn't deliver since the corn cob incident, which I WAS ACQUITTED OF DUE TO LACK OF EVIDENCE!

Thanks Shadowman for all your wonderful kneecap busting lawyers.

News Credits: 2 · by **Shadowman** » Thu Dec 11, 2008 7:59 pm

Psycho Warrior wrote:
Celsius/Fahrenhiet wrote:*walks in* wtf this place has no tacos

*randomly walks over to a lampshade and plays dressup with it*

*dust bunnies start off with first newspaper, now magizine (guess what it is)

Because tacos are devoured on the spot. ... and the taco bell doesn't deliver since the corn cob incident, which I WAS ACQUITTED OF DUE TO LACK OF EVIDENCE!

Thanks Shadowman for all your wonderful kneecap busting lawyers.

You're welcome. Now, as payment, I need $5,000,000,000, your left arm, all the fingers on your right hand, both of your knees (For my "How to properly bust kneecaps" seminar. I invite you to come see it, the keynote on lead pipes is quite amazing), whatever you use as a home, your soul, your first born, and a million Burger King Whoppers.

by **Psycho Warrior** » Thu Dec 11, 2008 10:43 pm

Shadowman wrote:You're welcome. Now, as payment, I need $5,000,000,000, your left arm, all the fingers on your right hand, both of your knees (For my "How to properly bust kneecaps" seminar. I invite you to come see it, the keynote on lead pipes is quite amazing), whatever you use as a home, your soul, your first born, and a million Burger King Whoppers.

I have 5 million burger king dollars, I have a spare left arm in that box over there and I'm sure there are some spare fingers and knees from my last botch operation. Last time I try a sex change in the dark. I guess I have to find another refrigerator box, but I've never had a first born or a soul. Hope you enjoy yourself. :grin:

News Credits: 2 · by **Shadowman** » Thu Dec 11, 2008 11:02 pm

Psycho Warrior wrote:
Shadowman wrote:You're welcome. Now, as payment, I need $5,000,000,000, your left arm, all the fingers on your right hand, both of your knees (For my "How to properly bust kneecaps" seminar. I invite you to come see it, the keynote on lead pipes is quite amazing), whatever you use as a home, your soul, your first born, and a million Burger King Whoppers.

I have 5 million burger king dollars, I have a spare left arm in that box over there and I'm sure there are some spare fingers and knees from my last botch operation. Last time I try a sex change in the dark. I guess I have to find another refrigerator box, but I've never had a first born or a soul. Hope you enjoy yourself.

...Crap, he's figured out a way to turn my words against me!

Knee busting minions! SEIZE HIM! And bust his knees.

by **Exdominus** » Thu Dec 11, 2008 11:11 pm

Shadowman I got a damaged package from the eugenics lab down the street, comtaining damaged thal dna. When I asked for kaled and they sent me the wrong order causing my investors to lose money! I wish to sue their sorry asses for the proper dna and the revenue I lost my investor in my experiment

by **Psycho Warrior** » Thu Dec 11, 2008 11:15 pm

Rex Necros wrote:Shadowman I got a damaged package from the eugenmics lab down the street comtaining damaged thal dna when I asked for kaled and wish to sue there sorry asses for the proper dna and the revenue I lost my investor in my experiment

*uses Rex's atrocious grammar to distract Jadow's goons while he runs away*

News Credits: 2 · by **Shadowman** » Thu Dec 11, 2008 11:57 pm

Rex Necros wrote:Shadowman I got a damaged package from the eugenics lab down the street, comtaining damaged thal dna. When I asked for kaled and they sent me the wrong order causing my investors to lose money! I wish to sue their sorry asses for the proper dna and the revenue I lost my investor in my experiment

Sorry, that's a conflict of interest; I own both companies. Plus, you're asking for the DNA of fictional characters. But then, I just everyone pig DNA, no matter what they ask for. (If they ask for pig, I give them a test tube full of old milk.

Psycho Warrior wrote:*uses Rex's atrocious grammar to distract Jadow's goons while he runs away*

Hey, he's getting away! DESTROY HIM! Especially his knee-caps.

by **Exdominus** » Fri Dec 12, 2008 1:41 am

Shadowman wrote:
Rex Necros wrote:Shadowman I got a damaged package from the eugenics lab down the street, comtaining damaged thal dna. When I asked for kaled and they sent me the wrong order causing my investors to lose money! I wish to sue their sorry asses for the proper dna and the revenue I lost my investor in my experiment

Sorry, that's a conflict of interest; I own both companies. Plus, you're asking for the DNA of fictional characters. But then, I just everyone pig DNA, no matter what they ask for. (If they ask for pig, I give them a test tube full of old milk.

Psycho Warrior wrote:*uses Rex's atrocious grammar to distract Jadow's goons while he runs away*

Hey, he's getting away! DESTROY HIM! Especially his knee-caps.

Screw it I have to do this the old fashion way!

*sends the randy 2.0 not stuck in the wall to go kidnap hobos out of the alley next to the buliding*

Time to use these subject to create my own Race of Daleks

by **Psycho Warrior** » Fri Dec 12, 2008 2:24 am

Rex Necros wrote:Screw it I have to do this the old fashion way!

*sends the randy 2.0 not stuck in the wall to go kidnap hobos out of the alley next to the buliding*

Time to use these subject to create my own Race of Daleks

Hobo Daleks? My god that sounds downright entertaining.

Hobo dalek: GIVE ME CHANGE! GIVE ME CHANGE!

by **Wheelimus Prime** » Fri Dec 12, 2008 3:36 pm

*while all this is going on i sneak in and start doing the thriller dance with 137 dust bunnies and 58 randys*

p.s. im still wearing the lampshade and an outlet bra :mrgreen:

by **Psycho Warrior** » Fri Dec 12, 2008 6:30 pm

Celsius/Fahrenheit wrote:*while all this is going on i sneak in and start doing the thriller dance with 137 dust bunnies and 58 randys*

I'm surprised that the dust bunnies haven't killed the randys yet.

by **Exdominus** » Fri Dec 12, 2008 6:43 pm

TIme to start the experiment *disects the hobos and extracts small strains of dna*

Now to Morph them in truely ugly things

News Credits: 2 · by **Shadowman** » Fri Dec 12, 2008 7:16 pm

Rex Necros wrote:TIme to start the experiment *disects the hobos and extracts small strains of dna*

Now to Morph them in truely ugly things

These guys were cloned from John Merrick. You won't have to work hard.

by **Exdominus** » Fri Dec 12, 2008 7:32 pm

Shadowman wrote:
Rex Necros wrote:TIme to start the experiment *disects the hobos and extracts small strains of dna*

Now to Morph them in truely ugly things

These guys were cloned from John Merrick. You won't have to work hard.

EXCELLENT *mixs a little dog **** and a little mad cow diseasies into the pitri dish*

God now to the cells bond then replicate *shoves the pitri dish in the incubator*

by **Wheelimus Prime** » Fri Dec 12, 2008 8:03 pm

*heats pitri to right temperature*

i hate my life and powers

by **Psycho Warrior** » Fri Dec 12, 2008 8:26 pm

Shadowman wrote:
Rex Necros wrote:TIme to start the experiment *disects the hobos and extracts small strains of dna*

Now to Morph them in truely ugly things

These guys were cloned from John Merrick. You won't have to work hard.

If it was Richard simmons and Andy Dick I'd be freaking out.

by **Exdominus** » Mon Dec 15, 2008 9:45 pm

*walks into the lab after a cycle in a recharge alcove*
HOLY SHNIZTEL!!!!!!

*looks over and notices squid like thing sitting in the pitri dish that smells like a mixture of old dog **** and gym socks*

BRILLIANT!!!!! It worked to see if it is alive *pulls out a tazer gun and shocks shocks the squid thingy*

Shock!

Squid thingy*blinks and wiggles it's tentacles then launchs it self at me*

**** *kills the squid thingy* time to start again

by **The Happy Locust** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 8:28 pm

I feel the need to bring back an old gag. But which one? There are so many? Hmm...

:-?

Got it.

*Locust drags an old dusty pool table out of storage and cleans it off.*

Good to have my old office back.

*after placing a diving board next to it, Locust dives headfirst into the pool table, vanishing into the green felt surface.*

Hey! Someone stole my TV!

by **Exdominus** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 10:05 pm

Time to start the experiment all over again *pulls out a test tube after repl;acing the incubator*

Lets start with what we already had *inserts a solut6ion of human dna as well as reconstited dog crap and a little mad cow dieases as well as some bipolar disorder disorder in the test tube and shoves in in a centerfuge*

News Credits: 2 · by **Shadowman** » Tue Dec 16, 2008 10:20 pm

The Happy Locust wrote:Hey! Someone stole my TV!

No I didn't! You're crazy! Now be quite, this crappy TV I stole from you has terrible audio.

by **Psycho Warrior** » Wed Dec 17, 2008 12:37 am

Shadowman wrote:
The Happy Locust wrote:Hey! Someone stole my TV!

No I didn't! You're crazy! Now be quite, this crappy TV I stole from you has terrible audio.

I concour and this priceless locust family heirloom isn't worth a dime. Probably because I dropped it in the middle of the highway.