The Ultimate Caption Contest
Starscream holds Elita One's chin
189 hilarious transmissions have been received from across the galaxy...
RodimusPrimeUkraine1 says:
Starscream: Do you like Dirge's sharp point?
Elita: Excue Me-
Starscream: the one on top of his head
Elia: Oh
Frenchhorngirl says:
"You know, it's no longer in style for us to have a pink paint job."
megatron1322 says:
Elita 1:I wouldnt touch that micro usb of yours if it were the last one on cybertron!
Angelbot says:
Starscream sings to Elita One:
"You're pink! Dance like an enemy!"
Boy George then rushes in, demanding royalty payments for ripping off his hit, "White Boy" and fuming mad over the colour being changed without his permission.
Angelbot says:
Starscream: I understand Angelbot thinks you're the best Transformer ever.
Elita One: Angelbot has excellent taste.
Angelbot says:
Dress rehearsal. One of the dance numbers from the smash hit musical "Evita One". Ramjet is the choreographer.
Angelbot says:
Ramjet: So, Elita, tell us. Is it true fear is not a factor for you? [insert cheap impression of Megatron's evil laugh here]
Angelbot says:
Because of Elita's reputation for knowing no fear, Starscream made her his first contestant on "Fear Factor: Cybertron"!
Angelbot says:
Starscream: Elita, will you marry me?
Optimus Prime: I heard that!
Starscream: I was only joking. She's not my type.
Elita One: (sigh) Will this war ever end?
Angelbot says:
Starscream: Now that you've been reunited with Optimus Prime, don't do anything I wouldn't do.
Elita One: You realize that leaves the door wide open, don't you?
Starscream: Good point.
Angelbot says:
Elita One: I can't wait for the end of this episode because that's when I get to shoot Shockwave!
But that's also when Optimus Prime leaves me again. Oh well, you can't win them all.
Angelbot says:
Starscream: You're beautiful when you're angry.
Elita One: Optimus! Rescue me from this pervebot!
Deceptifemme84 says:
Starscream: "What lovely optics you have, my dear."
Elita One: "Take your hand off me, you jerk! I'm not that kind of femme!"
Starscream: "Oh really. I suppose these photos Reflector took are of no concern to you then."
Lee Austin says:
Starscream: (Singing) We should be lovers
Elita 1: (Singing) We can't do that
Starscream: (Still Singing) We should be lovers and thats a fact
Judynator says:
Starscream: Hello baby! You come me on the bed?
Elita: No! Im not!
Starscream: Pleaseeeeeeee!
Elita: No!
Starscream: Pleeeeeeeeeeaseeeeeeeeee!
Elita: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Starscream: Aww... F*ck!
starscream_the_eternal says:
SS: I told you I'm not marrying you unless you sign the prenup, who do you take me for Megatron. Ha Ha Ha. Groomsmen remove her from my sight.
Roadshadow says:
Starscream: So, since Prime's dead, how about you and me at the Olive Garden tonight?
Dragonoth says:
Starscream: Not so leet now, are you?
E1337a 1: Starscream, j00 n00b! Y0u'r3 /V0 h4x0rz, j0u|2 (0mpu73r i/V73rf4(3 sk1llz a|2e nu11!
Stasrscream: Don't call me a n00b! I only need to point and click and my friend will upload a computer-unf
Dragonoth says:
Starscream: Not so leet now, are you?
E1337a 1: Starscream, j00 n00b! Y0u'r3 /V0 h4x0rz, j0u|2 (0mpu73r i/V73rf4(3 s|
SilentBlaster says:
Elita One: what do you want?
Starscream:To see my face on a dollar bill..oh wrong line.
TFC-Starscream says:
Starscream-I'm more manly then Optimus Prime, Elita One. Why not try and find out for yourself?
Elita One-I rather go and sleep with Megatron then be with you, girly man.
Starscream shouts in high pitch voice-I'M NOT A GIRL!
Thurst-Some
Voyager Prime says:
Starscream: You won't be so smug for long, my dear. Thrust! Ramjet! Take her to... the "Barney Room"!
Thrust: But Starscream, not even Megatron would be that cruel.
Starscream: I'm in command now. Obey me! (The jets take her away
TFC-Starscream says:
Starscream-Your mine Darling.
Elita One-In your dreams creep!
Starscream-Ahhh, don't be like that, i am more better then Optimus ever will be.
Elita One-Somehow i doubt it.
Kamakaze Thrower says:
Guess what Starscream's about to to do to Elita One.
And no, it isn't about love.
archangel_tears says:
Elita One: oh baby give me more of that stuff i snorted last night. we had the best time rolling around in the hay.
Starscream: you know it baby, megatron and optimus could never please you together, like i can. now i want you to go out to the barn and i
Dragonoth says:
Starscream: "Just one thing I want to know before I use you as bait to trap Optimus Prime: what's the purpose of female Autobots?"
Elita One: "Of course you wouldn't know, being a Decepticon. Female Autobots were created by Primu
Dragonoth says:
Starscream (interrupting): "Don't lecture me! Soon Prime will walk into my trap. After I destroy him, Megatron will be forced to accept me as the new leader!"
Ramjet: "Uh, Starscream, I think there's a problem with this plan.&quo
luevanoalx says:
STARSCREAM: WHAT DO YOU SEE IN THE BIG RED WANNABE LEADER?I AM A BETTER LOVER....
ELITA:WHAT EVER 10 SECOND FREAK....AT LEAST HE PAYS CHILD SUPPORT..
juggaloG says:
SS: After I use you to lure Prime into my trap and destroy that big red fool, you will give birth to a WHOLE ARMY of Decepticons loyal to me who will help me conquer the UNIVERSE! HAHAHAHAHA!
E1: I will NEVER serve you, fiend!
SS: You sound as i
Soda Pop Kurtis says:
Good day everyone. Today we have learned a valuable lesson. It is not wise for female Autobot to cheat on his husband with a Decepticon. Often times this kind of relationship will wind up turning violent in the end and will most likely wind up on my show.
Dark Laserwave says:
Not by the hairs of your chinny-chin-chin, huh? We`ll see about that!
1337W422102 says:
SS: To do or not to do, that is the question...
E1: Wrong play, dumbass.
DestronMatrix says:
Elita 1:"starscream I love you, I would do anything for you, ANYTHING!"
Starscream:"sorry baby, but I don't swing that way"
Ramjet:"uh, starscream she said anything and she is pretty hot."
Starscream:"Ra
DecepticonRedAlert says:
today on pimp my bot
e1:why am i doing this
ss:were better than the fab cons
r:yeah he's got a point
thrust:yeah behind his armor
ss:WHAT!!!!
DecepticonRedAlert says:
ss:mirror mirror on the wall who's the cutest of them all
e1:sure isn't you
ss:oh sure robot females hate me but the human chicks dig me
Operation Ravage says:
Starscream: Like it or not, Elita-1, you ARE going to give me a make-over!
NOBODY LOVES WHEELIE says:
Starscream,"Oh almost done darling. A few highlights,some eyeliner,a snd then a whole new outfit!"
Decepticon Ambush Makeover weekdays at 2:30 after Judge Judy.
snavej says:
Elita-1: The button next to my left eye gives me great pleasure. The button on my left arm sounds my Dukes of Hazzard horn. The button on my left hip gives me terrible pain.
[Starscream presses the hip button.]
Elita-1: No, that's wrong; the
snavej says:
Seymour Skinner and Edna Krabappel indulge in ever more extreme sexual masquerade games.
Groundskeeper Willie never does find out what happened to his tractor.
[Simpsons reference.]
snavej says:
Elita-1: Over the last 4 million years, while you were in stasis, I've done it with approximately 89.5 million mechanoids. I now have 3.8 million kinds of V.D. It's a miracle that I'm still alive. Do you still want to have me, Starscream
snavej says:
Elita-1: Forget Pantene, Revlon and all that dross - I use TURTLE WAX.
Thrust: I hear it's made from real turtles.
Elita-1: I'm not callous like you. My Turtle Wax is made from fake plastic turtles.
snavej says:
Starscream: You are going to help me write beautiful captions for Seibertron.com, whether you like it or not! I'm very keen to satirise my rivals.
Elita-1: Unlikely, Decepticon. My programming only extends to copying out song lyrics.
Starscre
1337W422102 says:
SS: "Oh, come on, Elita, can't you give me a discount?"
E1: "Sorry, it's €19.95 for EVERYONE."
SS: "Hmm, well can I get a group rate if Ramjet joins?"
RJ: "W007!!"
Acelister says:
*Cheesy 70's pr0n movie music*
Starscream: "Elita One... You know you want to... Wait a second... Soundwave, stop that music!"
Megatron: "I commanded him to play it, Starscream. Keep filming, Reflector! We can get rid of that in
1337W422102 says:
Let me tell you about a girl I know,
had a drink about a hour ago.
Sitting in a corner by herself, in a bar in downtown Hell.
1337W422102 says:
She heard a noise and she looked through the door.
And saw a man she'd never seen before.
Light skin, light blue eyes, a double-chin and a plastic smile.
Well, her heart raced as he walked in the door
And took an empty seat next to her at the bar
1337W422102 says:
And she said."Wait a minute I have to think."
He said, "That's fine. May I please buy you a drink"
One drink turned into 3 or 4 and they left and got into his car
and they drove away someplace real far.
Now babe the time has
1337W422102 says:
That's when things got out of control.
She didn't want to, he had his way.
She said, "Let's Go"
He said, "No Way!"
Come on babe it's your lucky day.
Shut your mouth, were gonna do it my way.
Come on baby don&#
1337W422102 says:
The next day she went to her drawer, look up her local attorney at law,
went to the phone and filed the police report and then she took the guy's ass to court.
Well, the day he stood in front of the judge he screamed, "She lies that little slu
1337W422102 says:
That's when things got out of control.
The moral of the date rape story, it does not pay to be drunk and horny.
But that's the way it had to be.
They locked him up and threw away the key.
Well, I can't take pity on men of his kind,
eve
SeekerInAFakeMoustache says:
Elita-1 found out too late Starscream was a member of the Himuro family and was slated to carry out the Blind Demon ritual that year. MY OPTICS!
snavej says:
Starscream: We've had a fantastic week, haven't we guys? On Monday, we cluster-bombed Calvin & Hobbes. On Tuesday, we hit Beetle Bailey and Marmaduke with cruise missiles. On Wednesday, we started a vicious guerilla war against Hagar the
Death-Ray Charles says:
screamer: tell me the secret plans,or ramjet will ram his head cone up your exaust
ramjet: yyyyyeeeaahhhhh...
snavej says:
Starscream: That's absurd; what makes Optimus Prime a better mech than me?
Elita-1: A seven-foot schlong.
Thrust: Frak! I'll have to change my name to 'Slight Push'.
snavej says:
Starscream: Tomorrow, my team and I will be bombing the crap out of the Rugrats!
Elita-1: And what makes you think that you can possibly succeed?
Starscream: Partly my supreme arrogance but also a rebellious, underpaid animation studio and a TV exec
snavej says:
Starscream: Hey, girly Jewbot, I'm going to defile you by making you eat my Prime Pork Sausage!
Elita-1: *Sigh* Whatever.
Thrust: You'll have to think of a new chat-up line soon, Starscream. That sausage jibe just isn't working!
snavej says:
Starscream: Lean closer and blow into my chest holes, dollface: it tickles my turbines!
Elita-1 (thinks): How I loathe Decepticon perversions.
snavej says:
Starscream: You have a woman's chin, milady.
Elita-1: What a coincidence: you have a woman's hand!
Ramjet: And I have a see-through woman's bra on. No one's noticed it for several months!
Elita-1: I wondered where that got to
snavej says:
Starscream: I went to a lot of trouble for this finger workout, but I think it's been worth it.
Elita-1: [Unprintable cursing.]
Starscream: Well, madam! That kind of language won't get you any closer to heaven!
Elita-1: [Cursing so bad
snavej says:
Elita-1: Why do all Decepticons have red eye?
Starscream: 'Cos we're long distance marauders, baby! I've done 100,000 miles just this week!
snavej says:
Starscream: Are you by any chance related to Alpha Trion? There is a certain resemblance.
Elita-1: No, my mother was Astronaut Barbie and my father was a lecherous waffle oven.
Ramjet: That explains the sweet stickiness I'm feeling here!
snavej says:
Starscream: And when we've finished with you, Elita-1, I'll use Ramjet's head for hoopla practice!
[Ramjet runs off crying.]
Thrust: I'm disgusted with you, Starscream! Once again, you have given away the secret plan prematurely
snavej says:
Starscream: I'm warning you, Elita-1; don't tell anyone about our secret love child!
Elita-1: You can't infringe my civil liberties like this. I'll tell whoever I please all about my sweet little Huffer. You have no idea what I we
buddhaquest says:
To think this is the TF to bring Prime to his knees faster than Megatron!
Acelister says:
Starscream: "And then, we shall destroy you!"
Optimus: "Okay and CUT! That's a wrap people! Elita One, you were brillant... Same time tomorrow people!"
Starscream: "One day, Prime... I will be Director and everyone shal
Acelister says:
Ramjet: "Hey Thundercracker, check out her skidplate, man!"
Thundercracker: "Mmmm yeah, that's one fine skidplate... Hey Rumble, get over here and check this out!"
Ramjet: "... Rumble!"
Rumble: "What? Oh, I wa
Acelister says:
Ramjet: "I'm sure glad nobody's noticed the fact I can't be the hands on the right of this picture..."
Ransom says:
A picture taken just before Elita One shows Starscream and company why you seriously do not want to scratch a femmebot's fresh paint job.
NOBODY LOVES WHEELIE says:
Starscream:You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar
When I met you
I picked you out, I shook you up, and turned you around
Turned you into someone new
Now five years later on you've got the world at your feet
Success has been so easy for
NOBODY LOVES WHEELIE says:
Elita:
I was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar
That much is true
But even then I knew I'd find a much better place
Either with or without you
The five years we have had have been such good times
I still love you
But now I think it's
NOBODY LOVES WHEELIE says:
SS:Don't, don't you want me?
You know I can't believe it when I hear that you won't see me
Don't, don't you want me?
You know I don't believe you when you say that you don't need me
It's much too late to fi
NOBODY LOVES WHEELIE says:
SS:Don't you want me baby? Don't you want me oh
Don't you want me baby? Don't you want me oh
Don't you want me baby? Don't you want me oh
Don't you want me baby? Don't you want me oh
Don't you want me baby?
1337W422102 says:
She didn't want to
She didn't want to
She didn't want to
She didn't want to
TAKE IT!!
(reference to the song "Date Rape" by Sublime, fits this picture perfectly)
Powermaster Jazz says:
Starscream: Sorry, honey, but I prefer male bots!
Ramjet: MMM-HMM They don't call me Ramjet for nothin'!
Stormshadow says:
Elita-1:(thinks) great now I'm going to get a long speach from starscream on how great he is.
Starscream: And now I shall be able to prove to megatron that I am the best decepticon....
Elita-1:>_
NOBODY LOVES WHEELIE says:
Unbeknowst to many Starscream made alot of the top decissions in Hasbro during G1.
Starscream,"Uhmmmmmmmmm NOPE. Boys don't want a pink robot. NEXT!!!!"
snavej says:
Elita-1: Red, white and blue with a yellow centre: you're just like the Americans, British, French or some other lousy Earth nation!
Starscream: So what? You transform into a little girl's bicycle, with stabiliser wheels!
Elita-1: Touche!
snavej says:
Starscream: That box on your forehead: you're Jewish, right? Orthodox kind - you wear the phylactery there, a little box full of scriptures.
Elita-1: Actually, it's a brain extension and right now I'm figuring out how to get out of this
snavej says:
Elita-1: I can get out of this!
Starscream: How?
Elita-1: I have machine guns in my tits!
Vitatech says:
that tickles doesn't it, hehehe, it does doesn't it? don't try to resist me, it tickles damn it!
Castle74 says:
Starscream:This place sucks when you're outta broke.
Ramjet:What place doesn't suck when you're broke?
skull-cruncher says:
see this is what happens to those drink the last of the oil,
mwahaha
Acelister says:
A scene cut from the very first episode.
Ramjet: "We were searching this hanger where the Autobot Shuttle just lifted off from and we found this one in the ladies room."
Elita One: "Sure, they checked the MEN's room before blasting o
Binaltech Bombshell says:
Starscream: I love your new chin tuck! That Dr. Reconstructicon does good work!
D-340 says:
starscream: you know, ramjet, if prime walks in now, this is going to look very awkward.
kennyman says:
starscream: bring your head up elita, i want to see myself in those hideous eyes
Screambug says:
Starscream: Kiss me, fool. You just can't resist handsome ol' me, so it's time for you to join my growing fangirl harem!
Bartrim says:
Elita One, you should be thankful that you are trapped in the presence of Someone named Starscream. Right now we have Chromia in a dark little room with THRUST. (Starscream gives a suggestive look)
kingmenasore says:
don't worry,tonight wheather you like it or not,all of us decepticons and gestalts are going to run a train on that tight little ------- of yours without lube!hey skywarp,call tripticon and scorpinock!!!!!
snavej says:
Elita-1: I'd leave it like that, if I were you. The urine makes you look better, more colourful.
snavej says:
Starscream: Tomorrow, you and Arcee will be mudwrestling!
Elita-1: If I smash her face in, I can be the loveliest fembot again!
Starscream: That's the spirit!
snavej says:
Starscream: You help me to rule the galaxy and I'll give you access to my vast wealth, for shopping and such like. What do you say?
Elita-1: Vast wealth? Shopping? Why didn't you say so before?! I'll do it! The Autobots can go and p
snavej says:
Elita-1: You think you're so hot, but your interior decor sucks!
Ramjet: A woman's place is in the dome!
Thrust: Less pathetic humour, more malicious violence!
snavej says:
Next week on Desperate Housewives, Gabrielle gets mechanized but has trouble with the neighbours!
snavej says:
Starscream: Morons! I asked for one that looked just like me!
Ramjet: Isn't this one close enough?
Starscream: Gah! Megatron's orders were specific. 'Go frak yourself!' he said!
Elita-1 (thinks): How did they ever get this
snavej says:
Starscream: Elita-1, did you ever see the human film 'A Clockwork Orange'? It's given me certain...ideas.
Elita-1: No, I haven't seen that film, but coincidentally clockwork oranges are my favourite snack.
Starscream: Well anywa
snavej says:
Elita-1: What are ya Ku Klux Klan fellas doin'? Ah'm a purty southern white gal!
Starscream: We have a cunning plan. Mixmaster, the black paint please!
Elita-1: Yellow-bellied Yankee traitors!!!
NOBODY LOVES WHEELIE says:
Starscream,"Once and for all. What in the HELL is that thing on your forehead?"
Elita,"It's a viewmaster!"
Starscream,"Ohhhhh yeah! Now I see it."
snavej says:
Starscream: This is not what it seems. We are about to form a Transformer pyramid. Acrobatics are good for the joints, don't you know!
snavej says:
Starscream: Why haven't the humans made a toy version of you yet?
Elita-1: I refused to give any blow jobs.
Starscream: You should ask again. Policy has changed at Hasbro since Grimlock started to offer blow jobs!
Elita-1: That's gotta
snavej says:
Elita-1: Your cockpit appears to be full of urine.
Starscream: My Diaclone driver hasn't been let out of there for several months.
Ramjet: Every day there's another depth of depravity to be plumbed!
snavej says:
Starscream: This is my last chance to prove that I'm straight.
Elita-1: Swollen-headed idiot! I am a ladyboy!
Starscream: Prove it.
(Large one emerges from Elita-1's front bottom area.)
Starscream: OK, I give up. If anyone wants me
Kevinus Prime says:
"Hey! When you shake her, the little window in her head has answers like a Magic 8-ball! Am I getting lucky tonight?"(shake) "Try again later? DAMMIT!"
Kevinus Prime says:
Elita: "Starcream, they should'a held my foot!"
SS: "Why? OWWWWWW!!!"
Kevinus Prime says:
Starscream: "Elita...why did they stick a Viewfinder on your forehead?"
Ramjet: "To see the female brain? HAHAHA!"
Roadshadow says:
Starscream: So now that Prime's dead, how about you and me at the Olive Garden on Friday, huh?
Starscream. The true badass player.
cdbrown48_288 says:
Starscream: "My dear Elita-One...I know that you would LOVE to fight me on one-on-one but you know that I am too much of a gentlebot for that!! Having two other Decepticons hold you back while I while I kick in your fender in front of Optimus is....
Sheba says:
Starscream: "Hey! UP HERE! Stop looking down there!"
Elita: Geez, he's got a bigger chest than I do...
Stormshadow says:
Starscream:I am your father
Elita-1: No your not
Starcream: What...
Elita-1: you've been watching starwars again haven't you
Starcream: No... what gave you that idea...
Elita-1:nothing absolultly nothing...
Acelister says:
Starscrem: "Look, all I said was that you havn't put enough lipstick on and you went nuts at me!"
Ramjet: "But I thought SHE told you that YOU put on too much lipstick..."
Starscream: "... Skywarp get in here! We have ano
1337W422102 says:
SS: "Meet my loyal minions, Thrust and Ramjet!"
E1: "I don't like the sound of this..."
Dr Buffalo says:
Elita: sweetheart, I don't think I'm comfortable with this whole role-playing thing.
Optimus in Starscream costume: But it was your idea.
SeekerInAFakeMoustache says:
"Nice kitbash, Ramjet! Flawless likeness, great articulation, paint looks good. I'd never have guessed you started with a Galaxy Force Thundercracker."
Zeedust says:
Starscream: "A kitty cat! I always wanted a kitty! Nice kitty, let Starscream scritch you under the chin..."
Ramjet: "You were deprived as a child, weren't you?"
Road Turtle says:
Prime and Elita finally get to go on thier first date after 4 million years, and then something goes horribly awry.
Road Turtle says:
Elita,"Starscream, only you would be so bold! The Cybertronian Senate will not..."
Starscream,"Don't act so surprised Elita, you weren't on any mercy mission this time, several transmissions where beamed to this ship by Autobot s
nexus_rayne says:
Starscream: Now tell me Elita, am I the prettiest decepticon ever
Elita: Yes Starscream, your a very pretty princess
NOBODY LOVES WHEELIE says:
Elita:But Seibertron is peaceful! We have no weapons,you can't possibly..
Starscream:Would you prefer another target,a military target? Then name the system! I grow tired of asking this so it'll be the last time:Where is the Autobot base?
El
A.J. says:
Starscream: Come my beauty, we have many issues to discuss. Military matters of thrust and penetration.
A.J. says:
Elita: Wait, you're a pretender right, so all this abuse is pretended and I can go soon, right?
Starscream: Hahaha... no!
LeafsFan2005 says:
My electrical cord is much bigger than Prime's, y'know. So go ahead and use that time freeze bull of yours so I can reactivate you as the first female Decepticon. Heh, heh, heh! Megatron would never think of this!
Death-Ray Charles says:
soooooo heres your freinds ? the other seekers need a date too...
Unknown says:
Starscream: "Okay, heres the deal: You be Nancy and I'll be the Yellow Bastard."
New Omen says:
Starscream:Optimus is dead and i am the new king of the decepticons. will you be my queen?
Elita: NEVER!!
Starscream:Such a shame, well ill have to leave you with my friend Ramjet. He's planning to test how fast his nosecone can really go....
Dragon Weilder says:
STARSCREAM: I thought u keeplip stick only on ur face but u seem to have kept all over your body Elita 1:u kept red all over ur body didnt you
Jaw Crusher says:
Starscream: "Elita, can't you see I love you?"
Elita: "Bite me!"
Starscream: "You seriously prefer Prime? A guy who let himself get driven from Cybertron four million years ago?"
Elita: "Shut up!"
Starscre
Payner™ says:
"You're gunna need one hell of an animation error to get out of this one, bitch"
Dex Antares says:
::Starscream:: Uh-huh. Yeah, that looks infected. Might wanna get some sorta topical cream or somethin'...
Payner™ says:
Elite 1 was NOT pleased about playing Yorick in the Cypertronian Shakespeare festival.
Acelister says:
Starscream: "I wish I was this pretty..."
Ramjet: "What was that?"
Starscream: "Nothing!"
Elita One: "He wishes he was as pret..."
Starscream: "I SAID NOTHING!"
Acelister says:
Ramjet: "Just think of all the things we could do to her before Prime gets here..."
Starscream: "No, don't do anything to her..."
Ramjet & Elita One: "What?!"
Starscream: "Everytime we're about to do som
Acelister says:
Starscream: "This would look splendid hanging on the wall of my quarters..."
Elita One: "That's my face..."
Starscream: "I know. MWAHAHA!"
Ratbat says:
Don't worry, Elita! Optimus Prime was gonna die a HERO, anyway. He'd sacrifice ANYTHING for you...even his own life!
