Top 5 Ugliest Transformers Toys
Saturday, October 31st, 2015 12:44AM CDT
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Top 5 Ugliest Transformers Toys
While being aesthetically ugly is a big factor, what is important here is that it cannot be overly intentional (like Beast Wars Injector, who revels in his aesthetic). This is a list of toys that would repulse kids and adults from playing with them. Not necessarily the worst Transformers ever (although none of these are great toys, far from it), but definitely the kind that, were they alive Toy Story style, would just hang out in a corner whispering "kill me". It was actually really hard not to simply include all movie designs. The overly alien look does render several of them quite ugly, like this one...
5. Transformers (2007) Arcee
ROTF Arcee might be ugly and look as female as a big bearded guy cosplaying as Princess Leia, but the design was just so odd that it became interesting. Couldn’t say the same about 2007 Arcee. Her face and the addition of the lipstick and alien robot hair done that way makes her step right into the uncanny valley (and don't get me started on the wheel boobs). The reason she isn’t any higher is because she actually has an amazing alt mode and the transformation is pretty great too. It doesn’t take away from the fact that Springer would only date this Arcee if she put a bag over her head.
4. Transformers G1 1984 Ratchet Gallery and Ironhide
These could have been cool toys, and they were once. Back before Transformers existed, you had Diaclone, which dealt with small pilots that rode in vehicles which became mechs. Think Mighty Max, Hotwheels and power rangers all rolled into one !!! Ironhide and Ratchet came from that line and while they might be cool if little figures could pilot their mech bodies, they become pretty darn ugly as official transformer toys. Hasbro removed the small figures, taking away the mech aspect and forcing it down our throats that these headless contraptions were sentient lifeforms with seats for faces. Just to give you an idea that this headless thing is seriously what they were trying to pass off as a sentient being, here is Ironhide's introduction in the comics.
At least your childhood toy was initially comic accurate, not that it's a great consolation prize.
A fellow board member said it best:
Lockdownhunter wrote:Show accuracy:0%
Awesomeness:0%
Ugliness:100%
Conclusion:These toys are garbage.
By...Computron
3. Transformers Revenge of the Fallen Mixmaster and Transformers Revenge of the Fallen Demolishor
More times than needed, you'll get an almost unrecognizable alt mode in order to get a pretty cool robot mode. The reverse has not been seen as much since G1 (see above) but Mixmaster certainly fills that spot in nicely. His truck mode is great and very nicely done but it gives way to a mess of a robot. This design looks far more alien than robotic and while it may work for some people, it looks quite ugly to me. The proportions are all over the place, on purpose, and that makes the robot look like it is made up of a pile of junk (not in a good Wreck-Gar way) and you cant make heads or tails of what you are seeing at certain angles.
The same can be said for Demolishor who's robot mode is beyond bizarre. He looks like a one legged alien just begging for his life to end (a wish Optimus kindly obliged).
2. Transformers Robots In Disguise Bruticus Gallery
Oh man, speak of a face only a mother could love, here is the greatest abomination to the Bruticus name yet. It really looks like Satan and Cerebus had a child and aborted it. Both modes are atrocious and I don't get what the smart thinking was behind using the same head for the beast mode but wrapping it in ... muscle whiskers ?
1. Beast Wars Optimus Minor
Speaking of just wrapping the robot head... urgh. Here is Optimus Minor. While he is insulting to me as a Transformer, where all you have to do is turn him 180 and move his head up, it's even worse with the way you turn him from a robot to a monkey. Here is a question for you, which is which? Look at the pics. Both heads look like robot monkey heads. And the supposed Beast Mode head is worse since it has an alien edge to it both in looks and the fact that it wraps around the "robot head" like an inverse facehugger. It is like an ugly version of those mutant heads of old instead this time, the mutant head is the head of one of the modes.
I would like to thank fellow Seibertronian Cobotron for these awesome pictures.
Honourable Metions: People find Omega Supreme ugly, but I don’t get it. He is clunky, sure, but he has a fun 80s robot look to him. You know, the ones that go “beep doop beep doop” and spin their heads, like the robot in Toy Story.
Also, I would have loved to include Animated Voyager Megatron simply for his alt mode and failed cannon, but I can’t say he is uglier than those on the list. He might be a worse toy though.
Here are some other ugly faces that I think actually work in the favor of aesthetic and add rather than take away (hence why they didnt make the cut). The best examples are from beast Wars, like Injector, Iguanus and Transquitto as well as G1's Transformers G1 Repugnus who's name suggests he takes pride in his looks.
Transformers Beast Wars Metals Iguanus Gallery
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Posted by Hellscream9999 on October 31st, 2015 @ 1:04am CDT
I loved the cgi counterpart to demolisher, and I also think that it is a highly efficient robot mode for getting construction work done (and mangling autobots), a pair of giant arms/hands, a head to navigate, and huge wheels to get places using less energy to do it
Although my favorite movie design is the pogo stick bulldozer guy, he looked crazy awesome
Posted by Fires_Of_Inferno on October 31st, 2015 @ 1:12am CDT
Don't judge me.
Posted by Grahf_ on October 31st, 2015 @ 2:14am CDT
Did nobody care about this these past 19 years or so or did nobody really notice that the hips are switched? Oh well.
And I guess I'm weird that I like the look of Demolishor and even Mixmaster in robot mode. Not all alien robots have to have human proportions or shapes for me. I think that's why I like the looks of Ax, Vixer Three and Taxxon from the Animorphs line. Centaurish robot modes needs to be a thing more often. I think the only other ones that can really do that are, coincidentally, RID Bruticus and Beast Machines Blackarachnia. I do also like the look of Bruticus although I don't have one so my opinion might change if I did. Even though I like and want that Arcee, I do agree that the "hair" or whatever that is off putting and weird.
I guess I have a thing for generally ugly Transformers.
Posted by Carnivius_Prime on October 31st, 2015 @ 3:08am CDT
I love Mixmaster too. He's got a very cool monstrous form and is highly articulaed. He's one of my fave Decepticons and I still need to re-buy that one (Another casualty of a mass selling I had to do some years ago for funds). His proportions are fine. I don't think all TFs should have strictly human-ish proportions and even then so many fail more so because they're trying but then have oddly stumpy forearms and stupidly long legs or something which really stand out as bad. Love Mixy.
So yeah those two wouldn't come anywhere near an 'ugliest' list for me. There's plenty more deserving G1, Animated (I hate the faces on those toys and the aesthetic), Unicorn Trilogy and especially Beast Wars/Machines. And then there's all those ugly toys that don't fit any main line such as the Prime & Megs that turn into shoes and stuff. The movie style is generally my fave aesthetic by far (not saying I like ALL the figures but generally most of the designs such as Prime, Bumblebee, Hound and others I find to be the coolest and most impressive incarnations of the characters) and is why I feel a bit stuck in a lull til the next film comes out and brings new toys. Yeah I buy the odd G1 update for nostalgia reasons (and even then I generally pass on most cos they're often bland or uninspired) but the movie stuff is pretty much THE Transformers line I had wanted since childhood (one reason why I never cared for the overly simplified cartoon designs and didn't much like the cartoon itself. Always liked when the earlier comics put a lil bit of the toy detail into them too like Grimlock's dino form ALWAYS looked far better when done like the toy).
I gonna go cuddle my 2007 Arcee now...
Posted by Rainmaker on October 31st, 2015 @ 4:12am CDT
Posted by RhA on October 31st, 2015 @ 6:38am CDT
Posted by ZeroWolf on October 31st, 2015 @ 7:52am CDT
TMII Igranus always screamed to me experienced warrior with that face, especially with the one good eye thing he works and the gladiator ascetic he's got going on.
Posted by Ominous Prime-Evil on October 31st, 2015 @ 8:02am CDT
Posted by Railbomb on October 31st, 2015 @ 10:17am CDT
Posted by william-james88 on October 31st, 2015 @ 11:27am CDT
ZeroWolf wrote:Poor op minor, Will you always give him a bum deal i didn't realise that first movie arced wheels were supposed to represent her boobs...i always thought they were supposed to hang off her shoulders.
TMII Igranus always screamed to me experienced warrior with that face, especially with the one good eye thing he works and the gladiator ascetic he's got going on.
Well Iguanus and the others mentionned in the honourable mentions are more like the flipside to the list where they are purposely grotesque and it works. I like him quite a bit.
As for Arcee, the toy was designed to reflect the CG model below, where the wheels double as boobs. My guess is that closer to the toy's release, they realized it didnt work well and thus the marketing material for this toy had an altered transformation from the original conception.
Transformers (2007) Arcee Gallery
I will also never stop hating Optimus Minor, that toy is an abomination to the TF brand on so many facets.
Posted by Cobotron on October 31st, 2015 @ 12:33pm CDT
The monkey loves the list! He's just psyched to be #1 of something.
Posted by Deadput on October 31st, 2015 @ 1:54pm CDT
william-james88 wrote:
Well Iguanus and the others mentionned in the honourable mentions are more like the flipside to the list where they are purposely grotesque and it works. I like him quite a bit.
As for Arcee, the toy was designed to reflect the CG model below, where the wheels double as boobs. My guess is that closer to the toy's release, they realized it didnt work well and thus the marketing material for this toy had an altered transformation from the original conception.
Transformers (2007) Arcee Gallery
I will also never stop hating Optimus Minor, that toy is an abomination to the TF brand on so many facets.
Those really don't look like boobs to me yeah yeah they are aliens but they really don't.
Looks more like armor or shoulder pads to me.
Posted by Deadput on October 31st, 2015 @ 1:57pm CDT
Demolishor was one of my top 5 transformers toys when I was younger (about 13 years old then) due to how much fun to play around he was.
Posted by Optimutt on October 31st, 2015 @ 3:21pm CDT
Ironhide/Ratchet is a surprise to see on it, but in many ways, yeah, they do belong.
That Arcee... woof! What a mish-mash of crap, refuse, junk, and garbage. Sure, her transformation might be cool, and her vehicle might be beautiful, but that robot mode... Does anyone have a sword that I can use to gouge out my eyes?
I'm also really happy to see Bruticus on this list. He reminds me of a bulldog (which, oddly, my wife has an obsession with), in that he's grotesque, but there's something oddly charming about his horrendous color scheme, terrible execution, and overall ability to make you want to throw up your arms and scream "Run fer dem hills!"
Excellent list!
Posted by Nemesis Destron on October 31st, 2015 @ 3:22pm CDT
Oh yeah lets not forget Toaster-bot.
Posted by Noideaforaname on October 31st, 2015 @ 4:22pm CDT
But a good majority of this list? Ick. Bruticus and Optimus Minor just aren't done very well (which is a shame, since a Dante's Satan/Cerberus and Optimus Primal Jr. had amazing potential), and Arcee's some really weird mix of dominatrix and alien robot.
I have to wonder what everybody's favorite Autobot medic would look like today had the G1 cartoon went with a more toy-like design.
My personal "Top 5 Ugly (but not monstrously so) Transformers" would basically consist of the Beast Machines Maximal cast.
That Iguanus looks rad as hell, though, like a hired mercenary or space pirate or something. Gonna have to track one down one of these days.
Posted by BERSEKAEL on October 31st, 2015 @ 4:22pm CDT
every single beast wars transformers should be in this list.
Mixmaster and scavenger are amazing by the way, love them.
Posted by RK_Striker_JK_5 on October 31st, 2015 @ 5:26pm CDT
Hell,
Nemesis Destron wrote:
Oh yeah lets not forget Toaster-bot.
Now that is a lot uglier than 2007-Arcee!
Posted by Hellscream9999 on October 31st, 2015 @ 5:29pm CDT
RK_Striker_JK_5 wrote:Sorry, but i gotta disagree on Arcee. her robot mode's sleek and well-proportioned. Her head, eh, I just really don't find it be all that bad, especially compared to other heads I've seen. I just see her wearing a kicky beret. And tire boobs? Not the way I've got her transformed/posed.
Hell,Nemesis Destron wrote:
Oh yeah lets not forget Toaster-bot.
Now that is a lot uglier than 2007-Arcee!
But he's a toaster, the troll value overpowers your well reasoned argument
Posted by RAR on October 31st, 2015 @ 5:42pm CDT
Anyway any list like this should perhaps have the Powermasters (Powered-masters) on it - those pull back and go toys were more than a bit gormless looking especially bullet bike.
Beast Machines Deluxe Optimus Primal is also a toy I always thought was somewhat unpleasant looking too . mainly the use of the clear blue - but any merits the mould might have are really hidden by the poor colour choices.
But in general something that is weird isn't always bad I think Beast Machines Basic class Scavanger is a good example of that yes he's a bit odd but he's also really good fun too.
Oh and I happen to think ROTF Skystalker is kinda Beautiful _ so much so that I own 2 blue (Smokescreen) ones and 4 of the Blackish Xbox green ones and I hope one day to track down Laserbeak too.
If you want to talk about unloved toys though I would say poor ol' 3rd Party TFC Phantom Ray is a good example of an under appreciated toy.
-------
ROTF Mixmaster suffers from the same problem as the Blazemaster mould in that you can never be quite sure when you are finished with him - how the parts are "officially" supposed to go isn't the same as what looks right - and some parts as shown seem to contradict the way the toy is designed even.
That said I do find Mixmasters oddly snail like artilllary mode sort of interesting - not that it's ever really shown or used by anyone especially but it looks like a hermit crab a bit and I find the idea interesting of a Transformer who hunkers down swings out armour plates to cover itself and then a huge cannon to fire back - that the toy can replicate that design so well interests me - even if yes Mixmasters robot mode is often more of a vague approximation than a finished defined effect.
I still find him more fiddly than ROTF Leader Optimus though less so than Leader Sentinel Prime - I can at least Transform him - where as Jetfire I've never once actually been able to get him in jet mode (and store the kibble at the same time)
Posted by D-Maximal_Primal on October 31st, 2015 @ 5:55pm CDT
some more beast machines guys should be in there. Those guys were just ugh in terms of looks.
Posted by RAR on October 31st, 2015 @ 5:58pm CDT
He's likely the only toy mould I can say that about though.
Posted by Burn on October 31st, 2015 @ 6:47pm CDT
Optimus Minor? Not fair. He's a great little figure. Both heads are clearly different. And his transformation isn't THAT much different from Optimus Primal who stands up a little higher and drops his gorilla head down to reveal his robot head.
RiD Bruticus? Again, not very fair. He's a figure that would have fit better in Beast Machines. I liked him as a figure though.
RoTF Mixmaster and Demolishor? In all fairness, ALL movie Decepticons are purposely designed to be hideous ugly aliens. Calling them ugly because the designers tried to do something a little different with their transformations isn't fair.
G1 Ratchet/Ironhide? Just because they don't look very robotic or anything like their cartoon incarnations shouldn't make them ugly.
I just think this is a very unfair list which only seeks to bully and discriminate.
Posted by Evil Eye on October 31st, 2015 @ 6:50pm CDT
Amsuingly, a bit of paint makes poor 2007 Arcee look a lot less like a parrot and a lot more like the sexy atomic-age gynoid she was evidently sculpted to be.
Also, I hope you realize that now Walky and co are going to dogpile you for being "transphobic". Rassafrassa bloody liberals mutter mutter...
Posted by RAcast on October 31st, 2015 @ 6:56pm CDT
I don't think I've ever seen Iguanus' robot mode head, that's pretty nice.
Posted by william-james88 on October 31st, 2015 @ 11:18pm CDT
Burn wrote:I just think this is a very unfair list which only seeks to bully and discriminate.
It's hard to be objective on a list dealing with looks, so I tried to be varied in how a toy could be seen as ugly. Though I dog reatly appreciate your input. You bring a silver lining to all TFs. But you can tell this list isn't about bullying, because if it was you can bet Stalker would be number 1
Delta Magnus wrote:I won't hear a word against ROTF Demolishor. He is beautiful.
Amsuingly, a bit of paint makes poor 2007 Arcee look a lot less like a parrot and a lot more like the sexy atomic-age gynoid she was evidently sculpted to be.
Also, I hope you realize that now Walky and co are going to dogpile you for being "transphobic". Rassafrassa bloody liberals mutter mutter...
Thanks for bringing this to my attention, that makes a HUGE difference on the headsculpt and looks pretty great.
Also speaking of Arcee's head, I interpreted the top part to represent a robot hairstyle. Is that wrong or it it more of a hat (beret) as someone mentioned above?
RAcast wrote:As always, thanks for the list!
I don't think I've ever seen Iguanus' robot mode head, that's pretty nice.
That means a lot, thanks! And yeah, Iguanus is great and shouldn't be too costly at the moment. I recommend getting him if you like what you see here, he's a perfectly decent beast former.
Posted by Hellscream9999 on October 31st, 2015 @ 11:21pm CDT
Posted by RhA on November 1st, 2015 @ 4:16am CST
Hellscream9999 wrote:Man, you want ugly, how about that supreme-ly hollow and over-priced rid 'bee? That thing is hideous on so many levels it hurts
That thing offensive and obscene.
Posted by Zeedust on November 1st, 2015 @ 4:41am CST
BERSEKAEL wrote:every single beast wars transformers should be in this list.
I know opinions technically can't be objectively wrong, but if they could, you'd have just provided a great example of it.
Posted by Evil Eye on November 1st, 2015 @ 4:47am CST
I'll give you ugly.
I can assure you this is not a bootleg. This is an actual, officially licensed Transformers product.
Posted by ZeroWolf on November 1st, 2015 @ 6:09am CST
Posted by Prime Riblet on November 1st, 2015 @ 9:24am CST
Posted by RAR on November 1st, 2015 @ 9:40am CST
Oddly some of my "Grails" include fast Food toys such as the Mexican Dumptruck Demolisher toy for example - I've always wanted one of those.
Some of the Jolliebee stuff is a bit peculiar looking too.
Some of the fast food stuff comes under more of the heading of "odd" than ugly though.
OH and huge props for pointing out the Arcee sculpt - that is really interesting - that is one of the best examples of how the right or wrong paint can really make such a huge difference.
I think i have a spare Arcee kicking about somewhere so I may try that - I've already continued here frame lines and added missing detail to the Motorcycle mode so that head fix would be in keeping too. I'll resist the urge to do it to my white & black ones though.
All this Movie Arcee talk has reminded me that I should chase up the blue quality KO of her sometime though - I keep forgetting that exists.
Posted by ScottyP on November 1st, 2015 @ 11:01am CST
Posted by Noideaforaname on November 1st, 2015 @ 3:34pm CST
Posted by Deadput on November 1st, 2015 @ 4:11pm CST
Noideaforaname wrote:I think there's more going on than paint in that Arcee comparison. The shape of the eyes are totally different along with the nose and mouth.
That's what I thought too but after staring at the image for a bit it's paint I can tell.
Posted by Starsaber468 on November 1st, 2015 @ 5:24pm CST
Posted by OptimalOptimus2 on November 1st, 2015 @ 7:29pm CST
See anything you like?
Posted by Starsaber468 on November 1st, 2015 @ 8:18pm CST
OptimalOptimus2 wrote:Wanna know a really ugly Transformer? Look at Wildfy.
See anything you like?
Thats not ugly... thats a beast mode plus this article is toys not characters XD
Posted by RAcast on November 1st, 2015 @ 8:24pm CST
mirageandjazz1197 wrote:Noideaforaname wrote:I think there's more going on than paint in that Arcee comparison. The shape of the eyes are totally different along with the nose and mouth.
That's what I thought too but after staring at the image for a bit it's paint I can tell.
I want that to be the case, but the more I look at it the more skeptical I am. Anybody with one of these handy care to take some high-def closeups?
Posted by Glarryg on November 1st, 2015 @ 10:02pm CST
If you want uncanny valley creepiness, though, look no further than AoE Crosshairs.
Glarryg
Posted by Noideaforaname on November 1st, 2015 @ 10:41pm CST
It's in Japanese(?) though, and Google's translation is lacking ("Woman leg of warlords"... um, ok?)
OptimalOptimus2 wrote:Wanna know a really ugly Transformer? Look at Wildfy.
*snip*
See anything you like?
Is that a trick question?
Posted by UltraMarginal on November 2nd, 2015 @ 12:26am CST
if by Ugly you mean messy there are other movie toys that fill that description better, devastator being one, and the fallen.
I agree with the post highlighting the toaster bot, that thing is hideous, as is pretty much every toy incarnation of frenzy from the movies.
I can see where you're going with ironhide/ratchet, they don't look anything like their screen counterpart and the robot independent of the platform is almost unrecognisable as a sentient form.
having said that, this whole list brings up the question of what is ugly? someone else mentioned that they love the movie aesthetic because of it's alien nature. they are some of the most innovative designs the brand has seen in years. not just in transformation but in the differences between the robot and alt modes. just because something is not humanoid doesn't make it ugly, does it? perhaps the deluxe movie Jazz mould fits in as ugly, horribly arms, munted legs and generally not nice to look at or play with.
interesting, I love these lists, keep up the good work.
Posted by munkimus prime on November 2nd, 2015 @ 7:43am CST
Posted by RAR on November 2nd, 2015 @ 10:53am CST
Posted by Evil Eye on November 2nd, 2015 @ 11:35am CST
RAR wrote:All Transformers have a pretty Spark.
Except Wheelie.
Screw Wheelie.
Posted by D-Maximal_Primal on November 2nd, 2015 @ 12:37pm CST
Delta Magnus wrote:RAR wrote:All Transformers have a pretty Spark.
Except Wheelie.
Screw Wheelie.
Don't go harpin on poor Wheelie. He has a massive spark for such a tiny frame
Posted by Downbeat on November 2nd, 2015 @ 3:51pm CST
Posted by Wheeljack808 on November 2nd, 2015 @ 4:15pm CST
It's basically as he said a bit of an excuse to not just throw an entire list of Movie toys on here because yeah 95% of them are the most hideous designs ever.
As for other ugly TF toys...how about that botcon exclusive pretender..what was his name? Oilmaster or something like that?
Yeah for me he ties with Optimus Minor for just being the most hideous toy ever.
Posted by Evil Eye on November 2nd, 2015 @ 4:22pm CST
Downbeat wrote:Woooooow, opening with transmisogyny, classy.
I'm pretty sure stating the plainly obvious and objective fact that poor ROTF Arcee does not look the slightest bit feminine (and certainly not attractive, even to a mechaphile like me) is not even the teeniest tiniest bit controversial, and is only "offensive" to Tumblrite lunatics who think that something doesn't have to in any way, shape or form resemble or be a female to be a female (yeah, wrap your brain module around that if you can) and anyone who disagrees is a filthy "transphobe". And that's even before we remember that ROTF Arcee is an inanimate object made of plastic with neither sex nor sentience.