Captions by datguy86

"And that's how I simultaneously exposed all 50 states to radioactive pornography and arrested for gross indecency."

Lord Megatron... Duuude... Through ecstasy, crystal meth, and glue no other leader compares to you!

AND NOW FOR THE WEATHER: OMEGA SIZED CHUNKS OF HAIL FOLLOWED BY IMMINENT DESTRUCTION. BACK TO YOU, TOM.

"Remote? This is not a remote, Starscream. This is an electrified proctology spike."

"Megatron, Prowl and I agree - Shut up and take our money."

Weight of chin at time of death... 250 lbs.!? Why that's twice as much as when the subject was alive!

Suicide mission time! Who wants to join a mission to the Hell of Insatiable Sparkeaters?

Jazz! I don't care how big it is, my envy demands you keep that thing covered during missions!

Yes! I finally found three mafuggin Prime Vehicons at retail!

Omega: Behold! My mighty crotch paneling!

Audience: Gasp!

"Thanks, Grimlock! Now that's another Vehicon I won't find on the shelves!"

Trypticon: "Oh yeah... I dunno how you got those minibots all shredded up in there but they are most definitely not coming out!"

Attention Earthlings: This club cannot even handle me at this precise moment!

"Add this pinch of little girl with attitude, bake in a protoform shell for 5 hours, and voila! Instant Deus Ex Machina!"