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The Ultimate Caption Contest

Captions by DeltaSeeker

DeltaSeeker has entered the battlefield. Below are their latest captions for your viewing pleasure — or judgment. React accordingly.
Bumblebee at the computer

Where's the "ANY" key?

Blaster with foam on him

Blaster: Hey, that's SNOW fair!
Jazz: Uh, that's my line.
Blaster: Oh, sorry...

Vortex with his hands up in the air

Vortex: Stop. What... is your name?
Optimus Prime: It is 'Optimus Prime', Leader of the Autobots.
Vortex: What... is your quest?
Optimus: To seek the Decepitcon Base.
Vortex: What... is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
Op

Vortex with his hands up in the air

Vortex: "I'm open! Pass the ball here, I'm open!"

Next thing he remembers is waking up back at base after getting tackled by Skylynx.

Optimus pats a Quintesson on the side of its head

Prime: "Ow! Hey! Quit biting my arm!"

Carly, Spike and Blaster at a concert

Spike: Wow, isn't it amazing how high up we are?

Carly: Yeah, it's a case of vertigo just waiting to happen...

Carly, Spike and Blaster at a concert

You know the concert's bad when someone brings their own boombox to drown out the sound.

Devastator is missing an arm!

Oh no! Now I can't count past five!

Devastator is missing an arm!

Don't shoot! I'm unarmed!

Devastator is missing an arm!

I don't think this is how you're supposed to play Strip Poker...

Slingshot wearing a car grill on his chest

I was trying for a complete remold, but all I could afford was a new chest.

Slingshot wearing a car grill on his chest

Do you have any idea how long I had to look to find a car with a grill this big?

Cheetor looks at his reflection

No, I'm serious, Rattrap. I can't see the top of my head; am I going bald?

Cheetor looks at his reflection

Oh no! I have measles!

Perceptor kicks the computer

Perceptor finally defeated King Bowser on Super Mario Bros., so he did a little victory dance.

Longrack sprawls out in living quarters

The Maximals design a character balloon for Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.

Longrack sprawls out in living quarters

Longrack watches the latest Richard Simmons workout video.

Longrack sprawls out in living quarters

Aa-choo!

Longrack sprawls out in living quarters

Sunstreaker: Help me, Sideswipe! I woke up, and looked like THIS!

Longrack sprawls out in living quarters

There's a new Destron out there, and he's THIS big!

Bumblebee plays an Arcade game

Crowd: First you eat all our pizza, and now you hog all our video games. That's it! You're banned from Chuck E Cheese!

Bumblebee plays an Arcade game

Bumblebee: Spike, why are all the humans standing around me?

Spike: They're waiting for their turn to play. This is the only game in here that's still 25 cents!

Bumblebee plays an Arcade game

No one had every seen a robot puke on a video game machine, until now...

Bumblebee plays an Arcade game

Spike: Bumblebee, we really need to go.
Bumblebee: This thing is a Decepticon, I tell you! It stole all my change! Help me figure out how to transform it...

Starscream takes off his Optimus Prime costume

Starscream: Aw, how'd you know it was me?
Wheeljack: Prime doesn't have shoulder vents.

First Aid stands next to an injured Blades

First Aid: We can repair him, we have the technology. We can make him stronger, faster...

Blades: Just no sound effects when I jump, OK?

First Aid stands next to an injured Blades

Blades: Well, my knees are happy to see you...

Rumble holds onto Perceptor's head

Rumble: I've almost got my Perceptor clone finished! Just need to adjust the head.... and done!

Rumble holds onto Perceptor's head

Perceptor tries out his new career as a rapper, while Rumble tries out his new career as a headset.

Rumble holds onto Perceptor's head

He touched me! He touched me! Ewwww! Decepticooties!

Blaster tries to tell Kup something

Blaster: "Are you sure the Hokey Pokey is what it's all about?"

Blaster tries to tell Kup something

Kup: Damn that Daniel kid! He left banana peels all over the floor...

Blaster: Look out Kup! I can't stop!

Blaster tries to tell Kup something

Kup: Red light!

Quintessons in transport vehicle

Quint 1: "You guys know what mccheesehat was saying?"

Quint 2: "No clue."

Quintessons in transport vehicle

The Quintesson's version of the "It's A Small World" ride.

Elderly woman in backyard with flowers and gun

Lady: "I wassss oncccce a man! Hsss..."
Megatron: "Well, that explains a few things..."

Rumble gets a ride on Dragstrip

He followed me home! Can I keep him?

Rumble gets a ride on Dragstrip

After years of suffering abuse from Megatron, Dragstrip and Rumble quit the Decepticons and join the Shriners.

Optimus Primal gets a ride!

Prime: Geez, you're heavy.

Primal: Oh, shutup. You think it's comfortable sitting like this?

Optimus Primal gets a ride!

Primal: Um, how much longer do we have to stay like this?

Prime: Until you frickin' smile, that's how long!

Optimus Primal gets a ride!

"... and every Christmas Eve, Santa Primal drives his big red semi truck, tossing poo at all the bad little children of the world..."

Optimus Primal gets a ride!

Primal: Hurry! The seeds of the future lie buried in the past!
Prime: *sigh* They don't pay me enough for this...
Primal: Megatron must be stopped, not matter the cost!
Prime: Hey! That's my line!

Optimus Primal gets a ride!

Reuters - Today, officials unveiled one of the cars from the bumper car ride at the new Transformers Theme Park near Orlando, Florida.

Optimus Primal gets a ride!

Breaker, breaker. We've got us a convoy! Yee-haw!

Optimus Primal gets a ride!

Optimus Prime: Uh, Primal? I don't think this is how Powerlinxing is supposed to work.

Optimus Primal gets a ride!

When Optimus Primal was a young monkey, all the other kids were jealous of his authentic Optimus Prime ride-on toy.

Optimus Primal gets a ride!

Prime: Get away from me, you damn filthy ape!

Monsters from Daniel Witwicky's nightmares!

Frankenstein: Yo, Gargy, what's the date?
Gargoyle: December 3rd.
Frankenstein: December?! Damn it, I missed Trick or Treat!
Gargoyle: I've had enough of this, let's go.... Hey! I can't move!
Frankenstein: Me either! My joints ha

Monsters from Daniel Witwicky's nightmares!

Gargoyle: I know the set for the monster movie is around here somewhere. Maybe it's over here. Hey.. what's that?!

Frank: Oh no, it's.. it's...

Both: PEOPLE!!!!!! EEEKK!!

Autobots ... ZOMBIFIED!!!

Kup and Springer join the WWE as a new tagteam, accompanied by their personal trainers.

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