Captions by Alphatron

Not a good day to be Bruticus, isn't it?

Flash!

Thundercracker: I wish to make a complaint on my robot.
Auto-Bot (Off-shot): Oh... yes, the Sparkplug. What's wrong with it?
TC: I'll tell you what's wrong with it: it's dead... that's what wrong with it.
A-B: No... it's r

Removing the head of a Perceptor is a difficult task... Rumble learned that the hard way.

Man: Hm... nice ass...
Blast-Off: What?!
Man: Uh.. I said "Need gas"!
Blast-Off: Oh.

Soundwave: ...and that is your mission, 007. By the way, this cassette tape will now self-destruct in 5 seconds.
007: What?!

Optimus Prime: Get off of me, fat-ass!

"Sniarbs! Need sniarbs!" -Zombies

Magnus: Uh, Prime... what the hell is that thing doing to our ship?

Worst... combiner... EVER!!

Starscream: Hey, I think there's something in this caldren!
Astrotrian: Naw, that's just Shockwave.
Starscream: Ah.

Braver: Aww... Crap! We're in the wrong movie! Daniel, I told you we should've taken a left on that last corner!

O.P.: Well apparently, you do have an energon figure.
Scourge: Sweet, what does he look like and what's his name!?
O.P.: Mirage and very crappy.
Scourge: Crap...

This week on Survivor: Transformers; the Decpeticon Starscream goes frenzy when he catches Arcee with Thundercracker and SkyWarp.

Megatron: Primus Christ!! I told you, Starscream to never go into my stash of energon!!
Starscream: {Drunkenly} But I *Hic!* thought you *Hic!* told *Hic!* that to Thunder---*Hic!*Cracker!

Megatron: Swindle said this weapon would be craptacular, but I never knew it was total 'craptacular'! SWINDLE!!

Hot Shot: Hey come here! I'll give 'ya a special pat-on-the-back!
Smokescreen: Stop! That's my special area!

Hey, Look! A movie within a movie!

Rumble: Oh my God! You killed Megatron.
Soundwave: You Bastards.

I like big butts and I can not lie, you pimpies can't den---
Megatron: Shut up, fat-ass!

Soundwave: Soundwave guesses slutty girls aren't the only ones with big booties.
Megatron: Just shut up and destroy the Auto-Bots!

Frenzy: Wait! Don't shoot him!! I love Optimus Prime
Optimus Prime: Oh god... he was coming on to me... Damnit!

Today's top story is the death of a very close friend: Optimus Prime.
Optimus Prime: I'm not dead!

Rumble: I hope this leads to the Auto-Bot base... or maybe a Pizza Pizza.

Springer: Hey, Razorclaw. Did you know that Megatron once a prostitute to Shockwave?
Razorclaw: Yeah. Did you know you'll be in energon, but your name will be Bulkhead?
Springer: Did you know that I hate you now?

Alpha-Q: Hey! Cyclonus! Isn't that G1 Demolisher on the view?
:Demolisher is on the view:
Demolisher: Lookey me! I'm Cyclon-butt! I'm stupid!
Cyclonus: Son-of-a---!!

Soundwave: Soundwave superior--- human inferio---
Guard: Wow! I'm going to give this to my daughter for her birthday!
Soundwave: Crap.

Foreinger: Dear God! What the...?!
Slingshot: We tried to form a Combiner---
Sky Dive: ---but then Devestator thrashed us... saying no one else can be a combiner.

Slingshot: Get off, Fat-ass!!

Galvatron: Soundwave... do you hear anything?

Soundwave: Other than your big Decepti-mouth, no.

BombshellL: Ahh... Crap!! I never realized I had a secret weapon! Now Megatron will have my head for this!!

Arcee: Hey, Magnus... guess what? I had this little meeting with the Energon council and they agreed to make me an Energon figure!

Ultra Magnus: Hey, I did too!

Arcee: WHAT??!!

Rumble: How the heck to we get this back to Megatron??

Starsceam: Whoever said I'M taking this back to Megatron?

Talk about standing out of the crowd...