Captions by Powermaster Jazz

Full Tilt is your son! Deal with it!

Me Grimlock heal you....with the power of.....JEEEEESUS!!

mmm....not as good as that hot red sports car, but you'll have to do.

"Yes, Yes, I know...Look what I can do. I seen it a million times."

Ratchet: "You?? A Wrecker?? HAHAHA"
Wheeljack: "I don't see what's so funny..."
Ratchet: "The only things you've wrecked is your science lab"
Wheeljack: "Don't make me hurt you."

You think Hasbro forgot about us?

I hear that relationships that happen under extreme circ---OOPS wrong movie. Come with me if you want to li---DAMN! Whatever, nice rack!

The Matrix: HEY!! OW!!!

Toy Story 3: Mistransformers

Optimus shows the kids his love for showtunes.

Woah....I think this stuff jus' kicked in.....there's a big dinosaur with a banana on his head.

Behold my army of bootleg Optimus Primes!

The quarterback never passed the ball to Vortex because quote "He's a dork."

I told Prowl to put his Kootie game away. Now it's goin' in the trash.

The new Perseptor toy comes with no accessories, but we here at Hasbro encourage you to use your imagination.

Perseptor: Using this pencil I will write an elaborate and mature Transformers storyline. Armada was just ludicrous!
Bumblebee: Aww. C'mon. I thought Hot Shot was cool.

Spike: That guy looks like a chick.
Carly: Shut up, that's Cher.
Cher: HOW MANY LADIES BEEN HURT BY THEIR MEN?
Carly and other ladies: WOOOOOOOO
Spike: There goes my night...

Hot Rod doesn't believe in all that "Freedom for all sentient beings" nonsense.

Starscream: Sorry, honey, but I prefer male bots!
Ramjet: MMM-HMM They don't call me Ramjet for nothin'!

After peeking at the Female Autobots locker room, Shockwave will never be the same.

"Hey, Prime! Ratchet's been looking at Elita-One's Playbot spread while pluging himself into the console."
"That bastard!"
"But I ain't one to gossip, so you didn't hear it from me."

Thrust: That cloud kinda looks like a t*t.
Starscream: You got cones on the brain!

The Decepticons after watching "The Program."

And they're starving?

Megatron: How did you fit in that Prime disguise?
Starscream: Forget that! Don't you want to know how I was in the disguise while I was also attacking myself? Aye there's the rub!

Blurr, I can see the letters through your face, thanks to the crappy animation.

Blurr's mom: Don't sit so close to the TV, honey, you'll glitch your optics!

Magnus: Can't we settle this amicably?
Divebomb: Wussy Autobot!

Characters from the rejected Disney film entitled: "Monster Dance Party" Reason for rejection: Too original.

SSSSPARRRRRKSSS....

Bram Stoker and Mary Shelly are spinning in their graves.

Wheelie waking up in Daniel's body: What the f*** this really sucks!

Hasbro janitor about to scrap Soundwave prototype that Hasbro doesn't plan to mass produce.

Arcee: Look at the wall! Now everyone'll know what we did in here.
Magnus: I can't de...on second thought let me get my plaster kit.

Arcee: So...what they say about city commanders is true!
Magnus: This isn't the time or place for that!

Kremzeek didn't know the meaning of the term "snowballing."

Dice Clay: I'm ova here now! OHH!
Kremzeek: PTTUUIE!

Andrew Dice Clay vs Kremzeek: the Aftermath

Cyclonus, a Quintesson, and a bunch of humans protest the next caption contest: Hell, no! We won't go! Hell, no! We won't go!

Quint: Think we should tell these organics they're gonna die in a few seconds?
Cyclonus: No let them enjoy N Sync's final concert. It's the honorable thing to do.

Husband: No wonder they're showin' Transformers here. It's a Transformers movie theater.
Wife: Watch where yer goin' you moron!
CRRRAAASSSSHHHH!
Newspaper reads: HARDCORE TRANSFAN AND WIFE KILLED IN CRASH. CAR CO. AND HASBRO FACE LA

Galvatron to Daniel: Beat it kid! Can't you see we're Jazzersizing?
Cyclonus: Maybe we should have left him in the plasma pool...

Arcee: What happened to him?
Magnus: He saw what Hasbro did to him in Armada.
Arcee: Should we tell him his Energon version is badass?
Magnus: Naaaaaaaah! Let him sleep.

Cyclonus: That puny Micromaster Autobot! That human could kick his tailpipe with one arm tied behind his back!
Quint: I'll put $50 on the human!