Captions by Swerve

Starscream: Megatron, it appears that this was the last of the remaining Rocklords. They are now all dead.

Megatron: How convenient that they were made up of rock. Their lifeless bodies become their own tombstone.

Starscream: Power of living rock, i

Prime: (In Spike voice) Oh Bumblebee, you're so big and strong and I find you strangely attractive!

Prime: (In Bumblebee voice) That's because you humans are attracted to fast cars and big robots and I'm both and you KNOW it!

Wheeljac

Megatron: What a crap hole! The next Decepticon that complains about our base will be staying with the Insecticons.

Sideswipe: What on Cybertron did I do to ---- the animators off? They keep drawing me in these horribly compromising situations.

Wheeljack: Congratulations Mrs. Teletran-1, it's an Autobot!

Ratchet: What the hell are you talking about Chip? There aren't any monsters under Teletran-1?

Skyfire: Why can't you just learn to eat Energon like everyone else?

Sideswipe:... asked the only Autobot with nipples.

Bumblebee: Zing!

Megatron: You know what, just forget it. It... it just isn't interfacing correctly.

"And so God told Abraham, a Jeep, to make a sacrifice of his human son Issac..."

-passage from the Autobot Bible

I thought Robots in Disguise meant I transformed into an everyday item that people would not suspect being a robot, not hiding under various pieces of debris.

Grimlock: Where did friend go? Me Grimlock hate Jurassic Park! Ever since movie tell people not move and Tyrannosaurus not see them anymore, Grimlock lose all friends!

Blaster: Well, there's a really funny story behind this...

Optimus: Which is... ?

Blaster: Well, Jazz is better at telling it then me... (runs off)

Jazz: Son of a...

Fast Track: The KO's are really getting ridiculous!

Ravage: Okay, you aliens are never going to get over your stereotype of anal probes this way.

Kid: Why's everyone looking at me weird? The big freak show is the 2 women next to me that apparently have never been outside before.

Spike: I've totally lost all respect for Megatron. The dude's a gun, he has a huge fusion cannon, and a ton of followers equally as dangerous. He can even just step on me if he wanted but what does he do? Researches my allergies, finds out that

Unicron: Oh, like you don't have to every now and then. Besides, what did you think happened after I ate all those planets?

Shut up you fools! My mother will only allow me to play sports as long as I where my padded suit.

Grimlock: Me Grimlock somehow understand that Marissa turn from adult into baby, what Grimlock not understand is where did Marissa face go?

Hello, I'm Chris Hanson, a little known alt mode to Trypticon and investigative reporter for Dateline NBC's "To Catch a Predator". Would you mind telling me sir what you are doing with those underage children out here in the middle of

Oh the Irony, finally Hasbro has released a show accurate Alpha Trion, and I'm going to sell you on ebay to a Hong Kong buyer and totally overcharge for shipping!

Skywarp: Yes, we get it. We all saw it nearly 10 years ago and you my friend are no Cameron Diaz.

Megatron: And is that... it is!?! Disgusting!

Starscream: Oh, a true comedian will go to great lengths for a laugh!

...you put your right arm in
and then you shake it all about.
You do the Decepticon Hokey Pokey
and you turn yourself about...

Ironhide: (spying on Decepticons) Jesus, I'm freaking happy Prime talked me into joining up with the Autobots!

Galvatron: I'm sorry Dragstip, I just don't like you like that.

Okay kids, this is the last fart I'm going to light. Besides, I think Sparkplug is starting to get upset that he has to hold the matches.

Bumblebee: So where do the burritos go?

Spike: Bumblebee, that's a computer not a microwave...

Bumblebee: Spike, do I need to remind you which one of us is the technologically advanced lifeform here. (to himself) Any minute now piping hot on th

Prime: So from what I hear there are some figures that get displayed in cases inside the house and on shelves, then there are figures like us that get displayed on the trunk lid of the broken down car out front.

Megatron: Could be worse. Parts of us co

Soooo, none of you jerks saw me choking just now? Why the hell do you think I was beating on my chest?

Sniff, yeah, sniff and then... and then... Waverider hit me in the back of the head and said I was... I was a... WAS A CACA-DOODOO FACE!

I'm sorry Mr. Galvatron, looks like your going to need a size 72 shoe, this style does tend to run a little small.

Starscream: Oh, sucks to be him!

(Looks over and sees megatron with arms folded in disapproval)

Starscream: I... I bet the Constucticons can probably buff that right out...

...And I told you, not until I get a ring on this finger.

Instead of hiring security guards, this small oil refinery thought they could ward off trespassers with their Optimus Prime.

Kup: Every year that Bumblebee checks to see if the toys are anatomically correct. What does he expect, we're freakin' robots!?!

Every year the military found some way to make their full medical check ups worse but none more so than the year they got the new prostate examination machine.

Michael Bay, if you think this one clip will forgive all the damage you've done to this franchise... consider yourself fully pardoned.

Unlike the other Decepticons, Dancitron's source of power was not derived from consuming Energon but rather consuming people dressed badly in circa 1980's clothes.

Don't listen to him! If you need to use a toilet, Shortround is right over there.

In a touching scene, Optimus attempts to pass on the Booger of Leadership, "'till all are flung!"

Even at this imposing size, Prime was still dwarfed by the original G1 release of Fort Max.

Prime... must... -grunt- poop, LEAVE QUICKLY!

No officer, don't listen to that guy, he's with them! The person that tried to put a mouth on me ran that away.

No one knew why Prime was trying to catch a taxi; he could have just as easily transformed and drove to wherever he needed to go.

The Cybertron Hokey-Pokey is what it's all about.

Ratchet narrowly escapes one of Optimus Prime's colorful turds.

Prime: Orrr Cnnnn! ORRR CNNNN!

Man in Yellow: Oh no Toto, Prime went and rusted up on himself again! Run up the yellow brick road and get the Cowardly Lion, we'll need his help with the oil can.

Previously this picture had been tilting slightly downward on the right hand side until Prime stepped in to straighten it out.

Unfortunately for Prime every dance move is the robot.

Sure they were enemies but Prime had taken a Hypocratic Oath and proceeded with Devestator's postate exam all the same.